How has ocd negatively impacted your life? Has it interfered with having a job?

Does anyone have OCD regarding always feeling like you are not good enough at your job? I'm 58 years old now I've had OCD since childhood. Every job I've been at I never felt as good as my colleagues. I am a nurse but I worked at that for 15 years I had a breakdown of sorts in 2017 and went on disability. I now work part time as a a swim instructor for kids. I always was afraid of killing someone when I was a nurse. Then I tried dog grooming but I was afraid I would do it wrong and hurt the dogs. At least now the stakes are lower. But my OCD is the same. I work with colleagues who are about 40 years younger than I am . I am afraid of teaching certain classes bc I feel like I wouldn't do as good a job as someone else. I know I can do it but it's like I have a fear of not giving them their money's worth. I've been at my current job for 2 years . I've gotten very positive comments from my managers but I can't seem to believe them. I feel a lot of shame bc I lost a lot of my life to OCD and I am at an age where people are starting to retire after long and successful careers and here I am working at an entry level job. I'm planning on trying to get out of my comfort zone and teaching some of the classes I'm afraid of .it's really hard. I'm always scared what if I lose my benefits and had to work again as a nurse how would I do it.

One of my best coping mechanisms somedays is to remember that while my OCD causes a lot of mental distress, it also can be a strength of mine. OCD has allowed me to thrive in my job, I tend to pay attention to small details and be in very good control of my work. I know exactly what is going on and often think before I say or jump to anger. I tend to apologize when something is truly wrong and be more genuine. I just know we all get in the habit of OCD being this absolutely terrible thing,,; and often it is,, but it also can be a strength in some. It shows I have empathy, am loyal, and a hard worker based on my attention to detail and want for control (even with my thoughts) ♥️♥️

Hi Everyone - has anyone else had problems with executive functioning - forgetting things, multitasking, attention, not following directions closely, etc. ? If so, what do you do to help? I brought this up to my therapist and she mentioned that I wouldn’t need a therapist Or specialist/coach to work on it - as it would be skills we know to do (take notes, put on reminders, etc). However, I’ve been struggling with OCD for years and none of these “tips” have helped enough. I have had trouble multitasking/ remembering details/forgetting things with jobs and had to quit. It even applies when I am at home - one thing goes in one ear and out the other. I also do not have or been diagnosed with ADHD or any other disorders (just depression from OCD). Does anybody have suggestions? Is it just to manage my OCD better and these things will get better with that? I don’t recall how I was when my OCD was “good” or in better shape (Up until age 18) to gauge this as I didn’t have a job or other life responsibilities. Only thing I can think of is maybe I am so caught up in my head that is causing these issues, aka the severe OCD. Thanks!