need advice

i don’t know what to do anymore i have to wash my hands 30+ times a day and i have panic attacks if i accidentally touch my face during school bc my hands are dirty and i have to pull out a napkin and wet it with my water bottle in the middle of class it’s so embarrassing and my hands hurt so bad they’re so dry and red and im trying to get myself to limit my hand washing to once when i get home and once before i wash my face at night but it’s so hard cause literally while i wash my hands my brain will be like “it’s just three more washes would you rather do that or face the consequences” and it’s so loud in my head that i can’t do anything but listen i hate my ocd so much

Hello anyone reading, I just wanted to vent here because at this point i’m not sure what to do or if i’ll ever be normal and my OCD is causing my mental health to go down the drain badly. It’s so debilitating I can’t do anything daily other than focus on it. I can’t feel comfortable anywhere, not even in my own home. I deal with the type of OCD where i’m convinced things are contaminated with chemicals or feces or any number of things. TMI: For example when I used the bathroom the other day in a public one and it went off on its own so now i’m convinced I had feces all over me so I had to shower and wash my clothes. Now i can’t even sit in my car cause the seat supposedly is covered now too from the drive home. I can’t touch anything on my floor or anywhere for that matter without washing my hands like my phone charger or my feet/shoes/ankles, door knobs, handles, anything cause i don’t even know why anymore. I’m terrified of cleaning products being on me or touching them, people spraying anything. I can’t have my windows down in the car anymore because i’m terrified of someone’s window washer fluid getting all over me. I watched a video about a guy accidentally drinking paint thinner cause he kept it in a water bottle and had to convince myself that my water wasn’t paint thinner and etc These are just some of the examples I have and I don’t know how to get over it or handle it anymore and I feel like I’m literally going crazy. Any suggestions or advice would mean a lot. please

Okay, so, I know it says I have a conqueror badge, which is partially true, but doesn’t tell the whole story. I’m better, NOCD and medication have helped, but I’m not where I want to be yet. There are still things I can’t get past. For context, I have COCD and POCD and they feed into each other. A few things I still struggle with thinking that they contaminated or going to cause harm to someone: • Any kind of bodily fluid, especially my own. (I worry with my male bodily fluids, that I could somehow spread this to people and worry especially that I could spread nastiness to children.) • The floor. For whatever reason I feel that the floor is really gross and that I’ve put bodily fluids on the floor and they are going to be spread to people. (Same type of issue) • Sink handles. • Shoes and socks and my own feet even after a shower. • Trash cans, bags, and dumpsters. • Playing cards. • Other people’s cell phones. • My phone after using it in the bathroom. • Doing laundry. I could use some advice on dealing with these things. A huge thing for me (and here’s where I say only 18 and older should read this,) is a very natural thing that happens to me a lot. Pre-ejaculate. This probably causes me the most stress of anything in my life. I get this often, even when not feeling sexually aroused. I worry that it’ll get on my clothes when I go to the bathroom and then I’ll end up getting in on someone. I worry that it’ll go through my clothes and same result. I worry that when I take my clothes off and some is in my underwear that I’ll get it on the floor and then it’ll end up in my feet, socks, shoes, and/or anything that goes on the floor at all. I worry about getting on the machines or my hands while doing laundry and have to scrub my hands after doing my laundry and/or wipe down the machines or use paper towels to open them/close them/start them/stop them or just touch very specific spots on them. I worry that I’ll get it on me before bed and then my bed will no longer feel clean and safe and I’ll feel like I need to wash my sheets/wipe down everything that comes into contact with my bed. I’m so scared of the possibility of all these things that I avoid doing things like touching my feet or shoes without washing my hands, spraying down the floor with Lysol Disinfectant spray, wiping down anything I think may have had contact with something that may have gotten some on it. I don’t know what to do anymore. I want to be able to just exist and not have to shower before bed or as soon as I wake up or have to wash my hands while I’m doing laundry. I could go into more detail about the other things but they’re relatively self-explanatory. The precum thing is not so I wanted to be v more in depth while describing this issue. I do not have any attraction to children btw, (Back to the POCD) I will protect every child I can. And that’s why this freaks me out so bad because I worry about other peoples wellbeing over my own. Please if anyone has any ideas. Help me. Thank you.