- Date posted
- 1y
Pocd and real events ocd
If I was 13 years old, and I made a severely horrible childhood POCD mistake that I was told about earlier in the day, but had forgotten about it because I had never heard of that mistake or done it before, should I be punished for it as a 23 year old?Does it make the intrusive thoughts true? I'm getting anxious from my POCD and real event OCD based on real events (3 times) from when I was 13ā¦ā¦ I don't ever want to ever be a P at all⦠I don't ever want to ever be a Chomo at all... i donāt ever want to ever be a rapist at all⦠I was 13 when these real events happened and now I'm 22... I've asked my mom about this so many times and every time she tells me that it's not serious anymore, that she doesnt remember it, that the person is okay, and that I'm not a rapist or a P or a chomo...Ā I was told what this word was, but I had forgotten it... I did not have full knowledge or full understanding on how horrible this mistake was... I was 13 at the time⦠now Iām 20⦠my POCD and real event OCD call me a P or a chomo because of the real events⦠while my mom reassures me all the time that itās all over, that itās not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that Iām not a P or a rapist or a chomo, but when I was doing compulsive research, I remember when I saw a post on a non OCD forum about someoneās similar situation to mine and two people said to the person that they mlested and that they neededĀ to turn themselves in⦠I donāt ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form⦠i didnāt know how horrible the real events were when I was 13⦠I really didnāt⦠and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids⦠I was 13 and didnāt realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again⦠I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event⦠I don't ever want to ever harm a child in any way shape or form... I seriously don't ever want to do that to any child in any way shape or form and I seriously don't ever want to do anything like that to any kid now or in the future⦠I never have had any fantasies about kids and I don't ever want to... I don't ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form... I was 13ā¦.. and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kidsā¦Ā I was 13 and didnāt realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again⦠I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event⦠And itās comparing me to actual Pās and chomoās who did stuff from 12-15⦠and making me think Iām a P and a Chomo because of it⦠I donāt ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any wayā¦Ā šššĀ and I get intrusive thoughts of people calling me a P and a chomo and me getting arrested⦠I donāt ever want to ever be a P or a chomo⦠the real events happened only 3 times and I really didnāt know how horrible it was⦠I donāt ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way⦠I donāt want to ever be attracted to or harm kids in any wayā¦Ā šššĀ Itās making me feel like I know Iām a P or a chomo when I don't ever want to ever be those things⦠I perform avoidance compulsions all the time and I donāt want to be anywhere around kids⦠even accidentally standing next to one makes me feel incredibly uncomfortable and anxious⦠itās making me feel like that I know Iām what my POCD and real events OCD are telling me even when a former ocd psychiatrist has told me that the real events donāt make me a P or a chomo⦠In addition itās making me feel like Iām what my ocd tells me that I am⦠I didnāt know how horrible the real events were at the time when I was 13⦠I really didnāt⦠my POCD and real events OCD keeps calling me a P and a Chomo for what happened when I was 13 when I didnāt know what any of that stuff was⦠I truly didnāt know how horrible the real events were when I was 13⦠I really didnātā¦Ā Itās making me think I am a rapist because of the real events too⦠my POCD just keeps telling me that Iām a P or a chomo or in worst case a child rpist when I donāt ever want to ever be those things in any wayĀ ššš