I don’t know how to get over this

On the 4th of July I got very drunk and at one point lost my friends in a crowd. I went back to my friend’s house and while waiting for them all to come back, I started talking to her neighbors and lighting off fireworks with them. I remember all of this event and remember when my boyfriend came back I introduced him to them. If I had done something wrong or cheated on my boyfriend I would’ve known and definitely would’ve felt anxious or a feeling of guilt/shame. A week later I was worried I had either gotten with one of them or one of my boyfriend’s friends. I was able to move past this but recently got a sore throat and now I’ve convinced myself I have an oral STD and it’s because I got with someone on the 4th of July. I told my boyfriend this fear this morning which I know I should not have done and I feel so regretful for it. I am so confident I didn’t get with anyone as I would remember but for some reason I can’t push this idea that I did and I just am suppressing the memory. This false memory is so hard for me to move on from because if it is true, I can’t be with my boyfriend anymore. What do I even do?

TexasOCD41

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zioi_7c3XeY&t=585s First watch this and i encourage you to watch his other videos He has a few on false memories. Ok, so I had false memory about possible cheating hit me out of the blue about a month ago and it FLATTENED ME! and I did exactly what you're doing. I tried to re-play the events (4 years old at this point so not easy) in my memory, I went through phone records, I even reached out to the person to ask ( was NOT a good idea) and guess what??? every answer I had, OCD has a better " but what if" " what if you just repressed the memory" " you know if you really did this then you need to confess and it will break your (now husband, boyfriend at the times) heart" " you don't deserve to be happy". It was AWFUL! i ended up missing work and in a bad place.... SO I reached out to NOCD and I started medication and it took about a month before things started to get better but ERP and meds SAVED ME! you have to STOP engaging in the thought. STOP directing it, STOP replaying it, STOP trying to solve it. Sit with it, accept it might be true ( its not, but by doing this you take away its power over you, its like playing reverse psychology with a toddler to make them do what you want by telling them to do the opposite) OCD Is a toddler haveing a tantrum in your brain. You should show your boyfriend the videos on false memories so he can know what is going on and hopefully can realize you didn't cheat, your just struggling with OCD. The sore throat too? probably caught a bug cuz your so stressed out your immune system is compromised. ( and STD symptoms would have shown up in July, not September) You're going to be alright. Watch the video

smokey32

Date posted: 1y

@TexasOCD41 Thank you so much for this video. I appreciate everything you said, it was very helpful. I’ll try and stop ruminating and thinking to hard about this. Thank you again

stuckonathought

Date posted: 21w

Convinced myself of something bad

Basically when I was drunk I was flirting with this guy I usual flirt with he was telling me that nothing could happen because he’s friends with my cousin, so I got really close to him and said oh resllr so you don’t want me, and I can’t remember what he said but I then kissed his like cheek or near his ear to like flirt with him and I’ve convinced myself because he said he couldn’t that basically I’ve harassed him. I left him alone after we’d finished talking but I’m so worried that me sorta going are you sure to him because he kept saying “maybe one day but right now I can’t” and saying “it’s not that I don’t want to” But I’m really scared that I’ve done something wrong. I keep picturing me kissing his cheek and him going like ugh fuck off when I don’t think that happened? I just have the worst anxiety around it right now

User17annon

Date posted: 20w

Please help 😞

I have false memory real event ocd, I’ve been married 13 years and I used to constantly bring up past mistakes from when we were dating and it RUINED our marriage, but I got medication and therapy and things got better untill a few weeks ago where everything crumbled. I have a memory that is 13 years ago of me being intimate with my husband (than boyfriend) while being intimate I have a memory of sending a text to a male who obviously liked me but I didi not while my husband was under the covers . And I keep thinking over and over how disgusting and inappropriate it was to do that especially doing it in the middle of being intimate 😞. I have confessed this to my husband last year and he didint believe me saying it’s probably a made up memory and would are not a slut and wouldn’t do that. Now i have guilt all over again for weeks and it’s taking such a toll on me it’s all I think about and try to remember every detail I’ve thought about it so much I don’t even know if it’s 100 percent true. But I can vividly see it when I close my eyes. How do I get over this guilt without confessing? Confessing would absolutely destroy my husband.

Chickenwang123

Date posted: 14w

I had a one night stand …

I slept with someone before I met the love of my life .. I slept with this guy and then the next day I met the guy I’m seeing now at a restaurant.. we hit it off from there and been together ever since .. I’ve had major ocd about confessing that I had a one night stand before him .. but I fed so hard into the ocd that I kept saying well what if I did more bad things not only before .. BUT AFTER I MET HIM.. So I’m comming here for some reassurance … my question to yall is .. if I did something wrong RIGHT AFTER I met my boyfriend , wouldn’t I have been stressing about that rather than what happend BEFORE ? Or maybe I just forgot ?? HELP

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I don’t know how to get over this

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