I’m worried I don’t actually have OCD
I’ve been diagnosed with ocd but sometimes I think I’m faking or I don’t actually, but idk if that’s the ocd tricking me or if it’s true
Don't want to give you reassurance but, meta ocd is a common theme
@Hopeful29 What’s that
@lexiiiiiiii - I think its where you have OCD about having OCD and if you're doing ERP you have OCD about if your doing your ERP correctly.
Rule #1 of OCD- it will ALWAYS try to convince you its not OCD. Its almost a hack you can use to KNOW its OCD. When I was early In my recovery I would say that phrase in therapy EVERY WEEK " what if I don't even have OCD and this is all actually real" and my therapist would point out " what if=OCD" and once I was more along the road with recovery I realized why its called " the doubting disease". Dont take the bait, just let that idea pass, its brain junk mail, no need to open it.
It also honestly doesn't matter. OCD isn't a disease and it's not a black and white diagnosis. Intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and compulsive behavior are experienced by pretty much everyone to some degree. OCD is just a label used when someone experiences those things often and intensely enough that it's debilitating to them. Even if you don't fall into the OCD diagnosis, the tools used to treat it are useful. It's kind of like GAD (generalized anxiety disorder), which is basically just a label for people who experience anxiety often enough to "qualify" them for the disorder. For whatever reason, their nervous system is just more easily triggered than others. If you often feel really anxious, it would be kind of silly to worry whether or not you're "faking" having GAD.
I do agree with this, i would add tho that OCD does present with modified brain scan images. For reasons yet to really be nailed down, people with OCDs brain diverts blood flow away from the frontal cortex ( logic brain) to the amegdayla ( reptile brain) and it causes and unnecessary shift into a false need for fight or flight. So I wouldn't call OCD a disease but I would defiantly classify it as a disorder with both physical and behavioral components.
@TexasOCD41 - Yeah I've read into that a bit as well. I personally wonder if it's a chicken-or-the-egg scenario though. Are the differences in brain scans the CAUSE of OCD symptoms, or are they the result of years of falling into that cyclical thought pattern? I think it's debatable, but then again I'm no neuroscientist.
my biggest fear is what if i don't actually have ocd and get exposed as a fraud. im afraid i might have been living a lie the whole time. i keep thinking that im not as ill as others here. i feel like i don't deserve attention, it's like im unconsciously invalidating myself all the time and j can't help but think that im an impostor in disguise. that im just doing this for attention. that i just want to be mentally ill to feel like i fit in somewhere. when i show a new ocd symptom im afraid that oh im probably just copying something that i saw off this app here because i want to feel like i truly do have ocd. i know i most likely have it but im so stuck in this loop of doubt. my ocd isn't as severe as it was in the beginning so that makes me feel even more invalid and i have developed impostor syndrome over the years.
So I was recently diagnosed with ocd and I have always been told since I was little that I have ocd tendencies but I worry that I am not ocd enough. Like what if I don’t have enough like things to address. Sometimes I worry that I’m faking it but I can’t tell the difference between what’s fake and what real
So sometimes I feel fake and evil, like everything I do or say is fake and that I’m gonna do something evil or apparently already done (false memories). Like I know it’s ocd cuz I got the symptoms, but i can’t get diagnosed yet, which then makes me doubt if I’m faking that as well. I’m kinda scared tbh and saying this makes feel like I’m lying and then lying about not lying and yeh
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