OCD

What would I do for ERP if my OCD says because I didn’t do something correctly or remember something I will have panic attacks that don’t end?

I’m thinking about doing erp but my ocd is so severe the thought of accepting my fears happening to me makes me sick to my stomach. I also believe in the power of my words and saying I accept this Bad thing will attract it into my life. I’m not sure what I should do🥲

One of my primary themes is “just right” OCD, paired with magical thinking. I don’t actually believe something bad will happen, but I feel like I deliberately make up scary, catastrophic thoughts like “xyz person will die” just to pressure myself into doing the just-right compulsion and relieve the anxiety. It’s like I use magical thinking as a tool, even though I know it’s irrational. Does this still count as magical thinking? Can anyone else relate?