Kids & OCD

Has anyone had kids while dealing with this theme? Right before my big flare up, and my SOOCD/ROCD was triggered this summer, my husband and I were in the process of talking about trying for kids. We have both been very “will we, won’t we” when it comes to kids, but this past winter I felt a big urge to have children now that I am 30. Every part of me was excited for this journey with my husband and our future, until my OCD latched on and now it’s all gone. I am so terrified to have children now because what if something happens or I change and I ruin not only my husband’s life, but now I ruin my (unborn) child’s life? I wish I didn’t have this guilt. If this OCD wasn’t there I would just be living my life like I had been, but now I just doubt everything.

🙃

Date posted: 48w

Hey! I'm a mom with OCD. I have a three years old son. And my ocd show up for me after having my baby. I'm now learning to accept uncertainty and learning to be more confident, compassionate and patient with myself. Sadly my theme latched onto my son and I went deep in depression. This started a year ago. Now I'm much better and learning that I can't be the perfect mom, I'm just trying my best and learning to deal with uncertainty (is something we all need to learn as humans, but us with OCD think we have to know everything and know how to deal with everything and that's just not realistic) So, the point is, we can learn to deal with uncertainty while we take this huge life changing decisions. A huge tip I'm using lately when is overthinking is asking myself "how would a person without OCD deal with this thought/feeling/anxiety"

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 47w

@Anonymous Thank you for your reply!

Midwestmother

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w

Hi - mom of 3 here. I've had OCD since childhood but was not diagnosed until my youngest was 2. I definitely worry about ruining their childhood especially when I'm really struggling. That said, My children bring me more joy and meaning than anything else in my life, and they help me live well in spite of OCD. Side note, I think OCD has made it challenging for me to decide if we wanted another/should be done. Definitely harder for me than my husband. It sounds like you want to be a mother. Don't let OCD stop you from living the life you want.

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 47w

@Midwestmother Thank you for your reply! Did you have these types of intrusive thoughts before/when you got married/started having kids?

Midwestmother

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 47w

@Anonymous Definitely. I probably have had OCD my whole life - fears around being alone in the world, eating disorder/body dysmorphia. I also have been dealing SO-OCD over the last 15 years - 3 major episodes, 1 before meeting my husband and 2 after kids. Oddly enough, I had wonderful pregnancies and postpartum experiences with no OCD flairs. Hope that answers your question!

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 47w

@Midwestmother Yes! Thank you! I think I‘ve seen your comments before. I have a very similar story. Mine has been about 10 years. My first episode was right when I met my husband, and then I was second episode was this summer, but I was just diagnosed after this one. I also have dealt with this my whole life and had no idea it was OCD until recently! It’s hard to work through, especially when it comes to people you love so much, but it comforting to know you’re not the only one going through it.

🙃

Date posted: 47w

Hi!! I'm struggling with the same debate in my head. Wether I can deal another postpartum and lack of sleep with OCD

Holl1

Date posted: 20w

OCD

So I’ve just found out I’m pregnant and I’m freaking out rn I’ve been getting thoughts like “I’ll be a bad mum” and overthinking everything & my OCD is convincing me that I’ll act on my thoughts because of my hormones and stuff. I’ve also got a fear of being sick & I’m stressing over that too. Anyone else who has harm OCD pregnant or a Mum can give me some advice pls😭

Harm OCD

Anonymous

Date posted: 19w

Moms with HOCD

I have HOCD and my biggest dream is becoming a mother. However, with my intrusive thoughts/images I’ve stopped trying to conceive. Is there any other people that has been going through this same fear?

2000

Date posted: 10w

motherhood & ocd🤍

I just wanted to ask any mothers their experience with having children & the positive experiences they’ve had despite their diagnosis (even the small moments of joy)? I have always yearned to have children & grow a family however recently OCD has made me question this desire (though when I’m back to thinking rationally my heart knows I’m meant for motherhood). though I’m not oblivious to how difficult it must be, I thought it would be nice to see the good amongst the bad, not just for me but for anyone else feeling a similar way 🫶🏼

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