Can someone help?

16+ only !!! :( Sorry that I’m posting a lot, I’m gonna try to make an effort to stop posting as much as I can after I make this. —- Basically, what happened, is that I went in my living room to throw my trash away, since I’m cleaning my room, and I saw my dad, and immediately I got thoughts saying “ oh what if he’s watching this inappropriate thing “ and I got a groinal, but I didn’t freak out because this happens like incredibly often, so I ignored it. But then the disgusting thought of me and my dad doing horrible things came to my mind, and i was like “ yeah I’d do that and cry after” ,, and I immediately started panicking because I said that, because I’m scared that it means I want to do that, or I meant that I want to do it, but that’s not what I meant??? I was trying to say yeah if I ever did that, I would cry after, but a part of me feels like that I felt like I would do something like that while saying it, but I don’t wanna do something like that. But why did I feel like I would do it??? as I was saying it? I mean this happens all the time. I don’t know why this is the time it decides to make me freak out. Sometimes I have thoughts about doing bad and I’ll be like “yeah, I will do that and then feel like shit after, so why would I ever do that?” Idk, please help :(

TexasOCD41

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 45w

you came SO CLOSE to doing an ERP exercise by saying " yea I would do that and cry after" because you were briefly no arguing with the thoughts and just going along. BUT you slipped and started analyzing and started allowing yourself to use emotional reasoning again AND you started giving power to your OCD by believing the false feelings and false attractions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6f3hxkdB4xA&t=166s Have you ever watched this guys content? he is VERY good at explaining OCD and ERP and how to get yourself better.

King silly

Date posted: 45w

@TexasOCD41 I had no idea I was so close to doing it right :( thanks for letting me know and I know this for next time!!!! I’ll watch the video you sent

TexasOCD41

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 44w

@King silly - indeed you were lol. Treating OCD is uncomfortable because you stop fighting the fears, and you have to sit with them and in the beginning it feels like your admitting they are real, it feels like you are acknowledging your worst fears, it feels awful ( notice how many times I said feel instead of know) BUT as you slowly starve the OCD creature, it will loose power and strength and you will start to emerge as the true person who is buried beneath the OCD. the POCD will decrease and you will still have the thoughts ( I do) but you will have no emotional response to them because you will be aware that its not you, its your OCD. not real. fake news, move along. be GONE SATAAAANNNN!. jk jk. but for real. the separating of yourself from the OCD creature is important. ( I picture it as a ugly little jumble of parts, like a creature from that old tv show " ahh real monsters" that use to come on nickaloodean lol. It takes some power away from it just by visualizing it as something stupid ( because it is)

tayanominous

Date posted: 25w

I’m scared does anyone else have these thoughts?

TW!!!! TW! Not talking abt SOCD in talking abt those really gross intrusive thoughts about sexual things with family ,friends, animals, random people. Mine is with family specifically my mom and I am so scared and my OCD is saying I actually want these thoughts to happen irl. I’m scared and these thoughts aren’t just the average incest thoughts there are sooo messed up it crazy, a few weeks ago I gas a thought that I was pregnant with that family member I mentioned before and I know ewwwwww wtf it’s sooo bad and I’m scared ppl will judge me for it in here or my therapist I’m so scared and it keeps adding to this thought like what it would be like if that were true and it’s sounds so crazy and gross and f****d up I feel so guilty and scared and I don’t wanna do ERP cuz I’m scared worse thoughts will come and your probably think well I can’t get worse then that but unfortunately it probably could anyways I’m sorry for ranting and pls pls reply cuz I feel rlly alone cuz I feel like no one gets THESE thoughts aghhh 😖

tayanominous

Date posted: 24w

Did I act on the thoughts?

I worry people might get the wrong idea when I share this but I must post it because I’m scared so basically this is gonna sound weird but I have always sorta been a violent kid but in a normal way if that makes sense like if someone tris over I would find the ridiculously funny but what kinda confuses me is when loved ones hurt themselves I laugh it’s not like I’m putting it on idk I just randomly laugh and i find funny please don’t think I’m a bad person because I’m really not and I’m scared abt this but that’s not the point of this story so I will get to the pint now so basically I was walking upstairs and I hit my head on the door and my mum laughed at me and I said “its not funny I hit my head” and she said something else that made me angry I can’t remember and then I started to charge at her like I was gonna hit her or something and it scared me cuz I wanted to push her or something ( not harmful just like as a back off kinda thing) which I know it’s horrible writing it out but then while I had that urge to push it her or something I also got a groinal so then OCD was like ”you were gonna s3xualy attack just then and you liked it” and now I’m to scared to go near her just in case it happens again cuz I’ve been in a spiral for days now, again please don’t tell me I’m a bad person cuz I already feel like that cuz writing it out it sounds worse then it is irl im sorry if this was triggering and please reply and tell me your thoughts on this.

Anonymousssssss

Date posted: 22w

Help

I deal pretty heavily with this. The last couple days, I’ve had what I think are urges. Something pops into my head intrusively and then what stems from that is me WANTING to just indulge in it even though it’s gross. I get worried bc I used to struggle w thoughts about my dad for a long time until eventually I just purposely thought of him while self pleasuring and got off to it. While that’s something I did, it is NOT me. It all stemmed from my mental health declining a couple years back, I was never this way before. So I get worried that it almost happened or might happen with my pocd cuz I could never live with myself if it did.

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