I’m having a bad episode right now and I’m feeling so depressed and I’m crying like a baby because I’m thinking that if my mom knew the reasons I’m like this she would hate me and what would I ever do without my mom. I’m feeling so alone. I just need my mom but I know I can’t open up to her. Like even if I’m this horrible person my mom would despise me too? I can’t handle that someone please help.
You are not a bad person and if she thinks that then she must be one. It's normal to have a bit of anxiety before opening up to somebody but you have to remember at the end of the day she gave birth to you and she's loved you all these years. Remind her that you're still the same person and nothing will change that. She won't despise you at all. Lmk how it goes!
@Ella_c She knows I have ocd but the thing is what if I’m actually this bad person. That’s what makes me sad, the possibility that she will hate me. Thank you for your comment❤️🩹
Firstly, you are not a bad person. Im sorry you are going through this right now. But its the truth. I understand the feeling. Almost as if your a lost cause that the way you see yourself is how everybody will. But the truth is that its not actually you its your head messing with you and i promise you opening up to someone can help with that idea. What we think and what actually is tend to be very different when dealing with ocd especially as a young adult. Im 17 and found it difficult to open up to my girlfriend about this. Once i did she let me know that im not a monster im not a terrible person and although i dont quite believe it yet i know she doesnt think im a horrible person. Your loved ones only want to help. Start with someone who you trust very much it could be your mom or someone else, but remember that telling someone and confinding in someone about it can open the closet your stuck in right now. I hope this helps i apologize if not. All i can say is i promise you, you got this.
@Lake7 Thank you for this. I guess everyday that goes by I’m believing more and more Im this horrible person and that’s why I can’t imagine anyone that would want to do anything with me. If only I knew this was all my ocd, I would feel different but I don’t know If what I’m feeling is common or not in the ocd community. That’s why I’m so discouraged. But thank you for your comment, it made me feel better.
You're not alone I'm here for you ♥️
I’m scared. I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel so anxious and depressed. I feel so guilty and ashamed. I can’t do this anymore...I need help but I’m scared to get help in fear of being misunderstood. I’ve been misunderstood for so long by my mom she doesn’t get it. She screams at me and makes me feel worse. She talks to me like I’m a disappointment which I know I am. My dad was the only person I could talk to about everything and he passed away a month ago. I wish I could just talk to him about what’s going on and I can’t and it’s driving me crazy. I know it’s the confession that’s a big no no but he could help me through it. I’m scared. I’m absolutely terrified by my intrusive thoughts and so on. I don’t know what to do anymore. I give up. I feel so alone. I don’t know how to move forward. I feel like an evil part of myself is trying to take over. I’m so sorry for ranting I just really need help
I really need help. This isn’t ocd related but I don’t know what to do and I have no one to go to. I think my mom is verbally abusive and I don’t know if I’m overthinking because I’m told all the time I overthink things but I can’t calm down. My mom has treated me horrible my whole life she doesn’t pay attention when I tell her things I’m excited about, she dismisses my feelings or when I’m upset and makes me feel like I’m a problem or that I don’t matter and that her problems are always worse than mine. She has threatened to hit me many times throughout my life but never has except for once when I was little I had a horrible headache and was crying from the pain in my room and we had company and she came in and hit me and told me to shut up that I’m worrying the company. She’s called me so many horrible names and just did today. We were playing cards and listening to music with my grandma and when I made a music suggestion she had a strong opinion about a singer that she has also listened to and when I got irritated about it she stopped playing and said I was a “little bitc*” said “another holiday ruined” and made a comment about my friends at work and that I treat them some way is why I lost them or whatever and she’s always called me much worse. I don’t know what to do. I’m scared and I want to escape so badly but I can’t I have no where to go. I’m 23 and live with my mom and grandma. I can’t afford to move out and if I did I would have to live in my car. I’m so scared and upset. I hate myself. I wish I could just give up and I’m scared if I do that than it’s going to get much worse for me but at this point I don’t care. I have no one who loves me or cares about me and I definitely don’t have my mom because if it were any one else she would be so kind to them and treat them so nice if they were going through a hard time because I’ve heard her do that for many people but in real life when no one is listening and I tell her what is going on and why I’m upset she yells and screams at me saying I’m a ungrateful bitc* and that there’s nothing I could possibly be stressed about and many other things. I can’t do this anymore. I wish I could be free
I feel disgusting and ashamed!!!! My mom texted my sibling and got mad at them because she thought they don’t know to take care of themself and then she said “I’m so exhausted between you and Ishil”. I can’t. I can’t do this. My mom keeps making me believe things SHE thinks about! What if I don’t know how to care of myself?! I try so hard! But then what if I’m not?! I already feel self doubt and she’s triggering me to an extent that I might do self harm and start bleeding!!
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