Narcissistic mom

Hi How to deal with a fucked up narcissistic mom that caused me to have ocd ?????? I have so much anger towards her and idk how to let it out.

hanysm@gmail...

Date posted: 24w ago

First, what happened? Why you mad at her? Maybe she is not narcissistic, maybe you just see it this way. I am not saying you are wrong or right, but try to cool down before jumping to conclusions.

noneed1

Date posted: 24w ago

@hanysm@gmail.com I've been mistreated my whole life bro, my mom HATES ME she even admitted it several times, one time she said that my little sisters shoes are more valuable than me infront of my siblings 😂😂😂 she thrives off provoking me what are u talking about bro, today i told her that i got an A and all she said was "okay!" istg ive never done something horrible even tho sometimes she gaslights me into thinking that i'm a bad person and I deserved all of that, but ik myself.

hanysm@gmail...

Date posted: 24w ago

@noneed1 First congratulations on the A. That's an achievement and you should be proud of yourself. 🎉 Second, reflect on your relationship with your mother by considering specific behaviors and patterns that make you feel mistreated. Are there recurring themes? It can also be helpful to talk to a trusted adult or counselor about your experiences to gain an outside perspective. When it comes to communication, using "I" statements can be effective. This allows you to express your feelings without blaming, such as saying, "I feel hurt when..." This approach can reduce defensiveness. Choosing the right time to discuss sensitive topics is essential; try to have these conversations when both of you are calm and not in the heat of an argument. Listening actively is also crucial—show that you are willing to understand her perspective, which can encourage more open communication. In terms of conflict resolution, focus on solutions rather than dwelling on past issues. Work together to find practical ways to move forward. It’s also important to accept that some disagreements may not be resolved, and that’s okay. Respecting each other's differences can help maintain peace. Lastly, prioritize self-care by engaging in activities that help you relax and recharge, such as hobbies or spending time with friends. Building a support network is vital; connect with friends, family members, or counselors who can offer guidance and emotional support. By approaching the situation thoughtfully and seeking constructive ways to communicate, you can improve your relationship with your mother while also taking care of your own emotional needs.

noneed1

Date posted: 24w ago

@hanysm@gmail.com Beautifully said, Thank u SO MUCH, i really appreciate the time and effort you put into this, i can see that helping me in the future, thank u again❤️❤️❤️

Estrid

Date posted: 24w ago

Talk to a therapist or someone you trust.

I’m Batman

Date posted: 24w ago

Why do you have to deal with her? You have ocd. That’s not going to change. Maybe she caused it maybe not. But it’s not going anywhere. You can recover though. As far as your mom, if she’s truly a narcissist then your anger does not matter to her. Your feelings do not matter to her. So again why do you need to deal with her? Set boundaries, limit the access she has to you and work on your self. As far as the anger , it’s only hurting you . Again she won’t care. You accept it , process it and move on. It sucks I get it. My wife has a narcissistic father. Hits all the requirements in the DSM or what ever for the diagnosis, just missing a professional diagnosis 😁. Once my wife realized he was not going to change and her hurt and anger only affected her… she set boundaries and only allows the access she chooses to allow to her father. Seems to be working for her. Good luck !

noneed1

Date posted: 24w ago

@I’m Batman She is, I'm trying, thank you🙏🏻

I’m Batman

Date posted: 24w ago

@noneed1 Look up Tim fletcher on YouTube. He has a lot of good videos on recovering from narcissistic abuse and complex trauma. At least it’s a place to start. Finding a therapist you click with helps as well. Good luck !

Zoë_84

Date posted: 24w ago

I also think my mother caused my sister and me to suffer from mental health issues. We did ask her to go to family therapy with us, once in our early 20, then again in our late 30s, she refused. Apparently, she had been an awesome mother and we are just ungrateful brats. Needless to say, both my sister and me have cut contact with her and the first Christmas I didn't force myself to visit her, had been the best Christmas in my life, even though I spent it alone.

hopefulxmess

Date posted: 24w ago

Struggling mom seeking support

Since I developed ocd as postpartum my ocd has mostly always targeted my kids. It started as harm and then switched to pocd. Both are equally very painful. For years I was mostly able to keep my ocd at bay but when it comes back it’s so bad. I have a son and a daughter and my ocd switches back and forth from kid to kid with horrible intrusive thoughts and now even intrusive ocd dreams. With each thought I get past and start to feel relief another one pops right up. The thoughts feel so real and true even though I know it’s just the ocd and not how I think or feel, the ocd always makes me doubt myself and question everything I think or do. I know other moms/dads go through this too. Please anyone who has or is going through this please tell me how you deal with this. 😪

TrustGod24

Date posted: 21w ago

Resentment

I’m turning 30 in a few months and all I can think about how my Parents never took the initiative to actually help me when it came to my mental illness. Now my OCD is probably the worst it’s ever been and I feel like I can’t do anything. Like I’m trapped in a tunnel and there’s no way out. I’ve gone from job to job, never fully finished my degree due to severe OCD/depression never making enough money for professional help and being gaslighted all these years about my illness. I resent my family and myself for not trying hard enough to get better. If anyone can relate feel free to share. Anyways I pray this year will be the year I find my out.

malolin_21

Date posted: 19w ago

Hey:) I just want to vent

I’m feeling kind of sad cause today was not a really good day in terms of my ocd. I was feeling kind of foggy/numb and that send me to spiraling. I’m 21 years old currently studying but my family has been having trouble with money for the last couple years(we’re just me and my mom) and I kinda want to get a job but everything is far from my home and I wouldn’t be able to return back at night, also it’s either way more expensive to move or the schedule wouldn’t let me take my classes. The point is that because of that every time my mom is stress tends to treat me bad, she speaks to me like I’m stupid or she just screams to nothing cursing all life and everything and that actually makes me feel soo bad and guilty for not doing anything, I know it’s hard for me to get a job that actually helps us without quitting school but that doesn’t stop me from feeling like I’m a burden. I want to help, I want to maybe hug her or something but I know she will be angrier and probably will reject it. So that’s it, I just feel like she punishes me for the stress she’s carrying and I get it but one day is happy and it feels like all love and the next is treating me like that, Idk it’s hard (also I feel like I shouldn’t be saying this cause it’s all my fault) 🫤

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