Is it normal feeling no connection towards your boyfriend if you think you're dealing with ROCD. I was talking with my therapist last Wednesday and she asked me if I can picture a future with them for the longest time I did but now I feel like my head is trying to tell me no is that common?
You need to continue living your life despite ROCD. I have had thoughts and feelings like that many times. OCD will cloud your mind and distort your feelings. You just kind of have to accept that you don't know right now. I had those feelings about my partner, and I just decided I'm going to savor each day with her that I am allowed to have, and maybe we will break up eventually but I'm not going to spend our relationship worrying about the end. It's hard, but it did help.
@MintyMLP I have been feeling this way for a year now, but I don't wanna see him go
I would suggest ERP to break the OCD cycle. I believe that will then allow you to explore your true feelings. Here is an informative video on ROCD. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UK3PCMRsn8I
@Monica Jordan Hey monica, i am thinking if taking therapy but idk if this is rocd or who i am as a person and if so what do i even do? So i have had a past with seeking reassurance from men and i am in my first relationship ever so my bf has had issues with my validation seeking from other men and he is scared i will cheat like today he told me that when we sit to talk i look around a lot and am not constantly just in our conversation and i realised that i do and maybe i look at men a little more to see if they are looking or to see if i will look and get eye contact and also like get validation and that means its in action and not ocd so its true and i am just this person who seeks validation and not fear of cheating and i also just came back from a girls trip and i also on the second night of it when we went clubbing looked at this guy who was there and cute and stuff and kept looking and one why would i do that and saw him also looking so felt good with validation wise and also saw him looking and then was like oh if he came to talk would i entertain and maybe would and why even think and again okay thought could be ocd but like thinking and action of mine seemed very real and not ocd and like yes he didnt come and i was not in the situation but if he had and why did i even want to and second if he had could be yes a what if ocd thought but i would talk to him and found him good looking take validation is not ocd its me as a person and also like make eye contact see if he is looking actually be relieved he didnt come after that cause one like thought would have allowed to come and talk and why even take that validation and most importantly i was not put in the situation but if it was for so i would right so not ocd and also thought why didnt come and also relieved cause scared would cheat and actions and thoughts say would and told me bf not to worry and i am past this but knew was lying and didnt tell about this incident cause could cheat and future it can happen so i am one a liar and not ocd but a person like this and maybe yes a little ocd but why even think and action wise do if i am not this person i am so the thoughts and actions and fear like telling bf nothing would happen but not convinced myself so doctor is this not ocd right? I would cheat and i should leave cause it doesnt feel ocd at all but truth and reality and i did these and would so pls help me ig… not even anxious and yes i look around so still this person and thats not okay and say u dont want validation to keep my bf and all the above says liar and i know so and is so?? Pls help….
I would start with a free consulation and get linked with a specialist who can provide some clarity on how OCD works and how it might relate to your experience. ROCD makes you belive you have to be 100% certain about your relationship but ERP helps you to accept uncertainty because it exists everywhere else in our lives.
This can be tough to navigate, I'm sorry! ROCD can make us think many things, many of which are not grounded in reality. Thoughts quite literally can be just thoughts. However, it is worth spending time thinking about your values and what is important to you in a relationship. Write those down. Talk with family/friends. If your relationship is healthy and in line with your values and what is important to you then these thoughts may be rooted in doubt that ROCD can plant. If you are truly not happy in the relationship then this may be another thing to look at. ROCD thoughts often are intrusive, distressing, and beg for an answer right away convincing us that these thoughts are urgent and need to be solved. These are some of the hallmarks to check when comparing is this an OCD thought or a regular thought. I hope this helps!
Having a really bad day with my ocd. Just had a massive meltdown. I’ve had 3 sessions with an ocd therapist and I feel worse. This is very confusing to me. I’ve read online that it’s normal to feel worse at the start of therapy, but i don’t know. I’m asking for a lot of reassurance from people, way more than I have ever done. My doubts and thoughts seem to be getting worse. My mum said if the relationship is making you so unhappy why are you doing it? This was sooo triggering for me but maybe she’s right? She said if I didn’t have the relationship in my life, I wouldn’t be having meltdowns or have an ocd spike, so she thinks I should consider whether to be in the relationship or not! Omg it’s so awful to hear those words. But maybe she is kind of right? If somethings making you anxious or unhappy, you stop don’t you? So why haven’t I broken up with him? That would be the logical step. Im so worried to make myself even more ill so im very scared to carry on with the relationship, because right now, my mind is telling me its the cause of my unhappiness and i would be better without it. But is that my ocd speaking? How do I know?! My life without him would be so bleak, or is it my life without the idea of someone in it? I have so many questions, it’s overwhelming. What if I’m not listening to my gut? Maybe I’m not. That makes me feel sick if I’m ignoring myself again. This is torture. What can I do to stop all these doubts and feel better about things!!! I would love some advice 🙏🏻🙏🏻 (this is my ocd talking, but comments that agree with my ocd are very triggering like ‘yes if you feel like that that is a major red flag’. Just comments that maybe give some hope, thank you 🙏🏻)
I’ve been struggling with relationship OCD and differentiating between what is an intrusive thought and what is a real doubt. I was really happy with my partner then I got one aggressive thought that I didn’t love him and this spiralled into noticing all his flaws. I struggle being around him because I feel a huge sense of guilt that these thoughts even come into my head and I cannot figure out if this is my brain lying to me or this is how I feel. It’s really impacting a relationship that is so important to me.
I’m really frustrated with myself. I got diagnosed with ROCD about 2 and a half weeks ago and now it’s taken over my life. I was just with my boyfriend who is absolutely amazing and I was obsessed with 2 and a half weeks ago and then a switch flipped and I started questioning everything and have gone numb. I noticed immediately something was wrong and booked an appt with my therapist who sent me to an OCD therapist who I meet with on Wednesday for the first time. I’m frustrated because when I’m with him I know what I should be feeling and can acknowledge how great he is and how good looking he is but I feel this block in my chest keeping me from feeling things. Anyone have any advice or has ever felt this way? I know I’m new to this and haven’t started therapy yet but my god it is so draining and the guilt I feel is insane. Let me know please🙏
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