A coach told me I don’t have ROCD because my doubts are “real” — feeling even more confused now

@OneDayAtATimee Thank you for your reply! You mean that u were in harmful relationship and you had rocd about this relationship and at the end you realised it was really harmful and your thoughts and feelings were true?

@polish_german_girl You’re so welcome! :) In that scenario yes my relationship was wrong for me but not all my thoughts and feelings about it were true. Something that would bother the average person as a 5, was turned up to an anxiety level of 10 more me. I felt an extraordinary level of distress that Ocd brought me and I was fixated on thoughts that weren’t as huge of a deal as they should have been in reality. Say more example- my partners looks aren’t super compatible for me. Okay fine! I could stay or I could leave based on that- that’s a normal relationship question. But OCD made their looks consume my every waking thought 😅 Endless rumination, questioning, reassurance seeking, etc. I couldn’t let it go. That’s where the OCD problem lies I also get doubts and intrusive thoughts about friendships that are healthy for me though. Ocd will make something small into such a huge disturbing issue for me that I can’t stop trying to solve. Ocd will attack BOTH healthy & unhealthy relationships- Ocd doesn’t only go after the unhealthy ones ‼️🙏 I’ve seen a lot of ppl with relationship Ocd that went on to marry their partners when they started to recover from their illness 😄 The future of your relationship can go either way!

@OneDayAtATimee This is what scares me :-( I am scared that I could have both like ocd and real issues. I am scared that I have real problems in my relationship and I really have to leave. And ocd makes everything harder :-(. I have also sexual orientation OCD, so if it’s possible to have ocd and that your doubts are true it would mean for me that I am scared of being lesbian and I have ocd about it and I can realise that I am really a lesbian :-(

@polish_german_girl Ocd is very scary and you’re 100% valid in how you’re feeling ❤️ Uncertainty feels horrible for us 😅 the best advice I can give it to work on your OCD recovery first- then a lot of your anxiety will start to go down and your confidence will slowly start to come back. Get connected with a real Ocd specialist haha 😄 And they will get you started with ERP therapy. Check for a therapist here at NOCD that’s licensed in your state. When the Ocd fog as lifted a lot and you gain more clarity and you’re not compulsing much, you could try to re-engage with some of these questions, but in a non-compulsive way‼️Be careful as that is a slippery slope sometimes In the meantime, act according to your values and try to live in the present moment

@Ezorabi I am scared, cuz I have also another ocd topics like sexual orientation ocd so it means I can have ocd about being a lesbian and really be a lesbian? :-(