overwhelmed by morals

tw just in case. don’t know what to put but just proceed with caution. I’ve been obsessed with brands/companies to boycott for palestine and have been using two sources for when I shop. I am in the BDS subreddit and every time there’s a new thing and it just limits what I can buy. I’ve successfully avoided products/restaurants but I have so many questions. for example, I know coca cola is being boycotted. I have this question: what if local restaurants (which is encouraged over big names) offer coke products? do u boycott the entire restaurant, especially when they say they proudly serve it? or when u want a drink with ur combo and anything except water has a product that’s being boycotted or is from a company that’s boycotted. do u just drink water all the time? maybe these are stupid questions but I wonder all the time. I feel like it can get hard especially living in the US with many products having to be boycotted. anyway, I read posts on the BDS subreddit and I have wondered about snacks and a lot of the snacks come from boycotted companies that are all over the stores. sometimes I just want a snack especially after a long day & mental exhaustion. but then 90% of the products in store are not safe to buy. I saw comments on these types of posts of companies/snacks to avoid and people usually go “who figured giving up z!0n!$t products would make me healthier/lose weight” or “the products aren’t healthy to consume anyway. you’re better off without those products in your diet” and while they’re right, wouldn’t the same be said for safe snack products? they’re not healthy either. but yeah, finding snacks can be a hassle sometimes. and then worrying which grocery store to boycott because it’s on the list. I have donated to victims in gaza and have been trying to boycott what I can. I don’t know why but I feel bad for feeling frustrated when I find out a restaurant/company/product is on the boycott list. it’s a constant thing. now I wonder about people who buy these products? should I assume anyone who buys from these companies to be evil? for example, the company I work for has had a history of controversies with the lgbtq+ community. we get a bunch of customers everyday and I wonder if these people know? do they even care? won’t be surprised since the company is christian owned. I feel like a fraud for having spent money buying stuff at my job. all of the times were because I was just hungry. while the company stopped making donations that harmed lgbtq+, I then found out that the owner donated to something that harms the community that made me feel disgusted. ever since then, I haven’t spent a penny at work. I have been budgeting my meal allowance and that is all. I’m just so preoccupied with the what ifs and everything I buy. I’m overwhelmed and I feel like by saying this, people will say something like “u feel like this is a chore? well imagine the many kids and innocent people dying from choices like yours. you aren’t dying for boycotting this product/company.” I feel overstimulated from this. it just feels a lot with other things I have on my mind. dealing with undiagnosed mental illness and fatigue while trying my best to make ethical choices is exhausting. I don’t know if this is a case of “you need to get off the internet” or just take a break. I’m always worried about being a bad person nowadays. I feel like I over fixate on actions I feel like should’ve been avoided. ughhhhh my brain is overloaded.

Rinneyfinny

Date posted: 19d

No I feel this deep in my bones. I am overwhelmed and all I want to do is good and be good. And I feel like no matter what I do im set up to fail. And by failing, im failing every person who needs me to do better. Im sure my friends are tired of me ruining everything. Obviously this is nothing on the scale of what people experience in terms of cruelty. But still it is very hard to live like this. A prisoner to your own thoughts. Always stuck behind a constantly revolving door.

julianofnorwich

Date posted: 11w

Does anyone have this moral ocd?

Where it's like "help the poor, oppressed, marginalized or youre a bad person" but also "don't help them too much cause that's saviorism" but also "don't talk about how you help because that's virtue signaling ," but also "silence is complicit speak out!" Like how do we know if we are doing the morally right thing?

Gmoki

Date posted: 9w

I feel off - need advice

I feel like my life is shifting for the better possibly because I’m finally taking myself seriously. However, I simultaneously feel like im so far behind compared to my peers. It’s like i have to fail multiple times in order for me to understand the importance of my future. Everything I do needs to be perfect and if it’s not I am never satisfied - whether it’s school work, appearance, or even everyday tasks. Then I keep reflecting on old memories and it’s very difficult. An old ocd tic is coming back where whenever I get a “cringey” or “unwanted” thought about myself I have to say a phrase out loud to get rid of it. Lately lot of my compulsions are old and new ones. For example, I compulsed and confessed to everyone in my extended family about my ocd because I thought it’d make them understand me more but it doesn’t. I overshared and over explained far too much to them as I usually do to anyone I talk to. I’m constantly over apologizing. Ill be driving, hit a bump, and think I ran someone over or a family or a pregnant woman and I’ll be pulled over. I keep getting detailed imagery of me getting crushed in my car. If I kill a bug I’m convinced I will pay for it in some way or another and karma will get to me even if I feel bad. I delete and redownload the same 3 social media apps every day. I’m pretty sure I have an addiction to pornography and I want it to stop. No other girl deals with this. Someone on here said on one of my posts reguarding relationship ocd before that I might have bpd and now this is really weighing on me. I can’t stop googling abt it. I feel stupid because I could have it so much worse like other people on this planet do and yet here I am. I have the privilege to log onto this app and complain about my troubles while someone else is worried about if they’re going to eat tonight. I feel incredibly selfish and small when I express myself because people usually think I’m too much it seems. I don’t like people in my generation (gen z) because social media has triggered my lcd and it feeds this idea to people that other people are easily accessible or disposable at any given point - you give someone a follow/unfollow button and now they feel entitled to you. I want to be left alone and not perceived by anyone because no one will ever fully understand me. All I want is to be a peaceful person, an amazing psychiatrist, an educated and healthy woman, who people will take seriously. I just feel like my goals are impossible because I keep messing up and struggling with staying consistent. I sometimes wish I could be someone else so I could take this pressure off me. I’m sorry for how scattered this is, I’m probably just overtired and burnt out from life

AnAnxiousPerson

Date posted: 8w

does anyone else get stressed about people lacking nuance?

I love my generation (I'n Gen Z), but I feel like we lack so much nuance. I find it really stressful. I feel like on social media, I just see black and white thinking. It's really odd too because I see a lot of people make hypocritical statements too. For example, someone will say that ChatGBT should never be used because of its environmental harm but they also use TikTok that causes a LOT of environmental harm too. I don't use ChatGBT, but I wanted more insight into this anyway and I found that both users release a lot of carbon. So, I think its weird for people on TikTok to judge a user who might be asking a few questions when they spend hours scrolling which easily causes significant environmental harm. (Note: one ChatGBT question is 0.3-4 grams of CO2 and one minute on Tik Tok is 2 grams of CO2; meaning 10 ChatGBT questions is at most 40 grams of CO2 but thirty minutes of TikTok is 60 grams of CO2-- the average teen spends 4.5 hours on TikTok) Also, just people saying if you do "XYZ you're bad!" or videos "exposing" another person, but then also claim to care a lot about being open-minded, understanding, or internet safety. I think its really stressful because it feels confusing to hear someone say "This is bad!" but then they also do the exact same thing in another way. It makes me feel confused about what I do in my day to day life. Is anyone else also stressed about this and feel like its making them sick or their OCD flare up?

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overwhelmed by morals

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