Here’s how I’ve been feeling

This document summarizes my ongoing symptoms and current challenges for my healthcare provider. Duration: About 5 months, starting before medication and persisting despite treatment. Medications: - Previously on Sertraline (Zoloft) daily - Currently on Citalopram 20mg (Celexa) daily - Sleep aids (NyQuil, etc.) do not help; still restless and anxious 1. Constant Anxiety and Fear I feel like I’m in a constant state of panic — convinced something bad or fatal will happen. My body stays tense (jaw clenched, spine tight, back aching), and I can’t relax. I have racing thoughts and nonstop internal conversations, especially at night. Time feels distorted — minutes feel like hours. I stay on my phone constantly, but it doesn’t calm me. 2. Physical & Sensory Symptoms I experience severe muscle tension, twitching, and numbness (especially in my legs and feet). My heart races, and I often feel hot or sweaty even when inactive. I have frequent diarrhea, gas, burping, nausea, and sometimes vomit mostly liquid. I feel an urgent need to urinate but only pass small amounts. My skin and body feel dry even after showering or using lotion. My throat feels tight, like something is stuck. My back and spine are constantly tense. Temperature and sensory regulation have changed drastically — I can’t feel temperature accurately. Cold weather doesn’t feel cold anymore, and showers feel scalding even when mild. I barely feel air from a fan or breeze. Sometimes my feet are cold, and other times they suddenly become very warm or sweaty. My sensitivity to sound fluctuates — sometimes noises are painfully loud, other times muted. My taste and smell are dulled; food and hygiene products don’t smell or taste normal. I also feel like I smell bad all the time, especially in my armpits, even after showering and using deodorant. It feels like my body odor doesn’t go away, even though I stay clean. Sometimes food tastes too hot or doesn’t taste right even when it’s not. Other times I can’t feel how hot the food actually is after heating it up. Water or soda also don’t feel cold, even when they’ve been in the fridge for days. It feels like my body and senses aren’t interpreting temperature or taste normally. Please evaluate whether sensory changes could be related to medication effects, anxiety-related hypersensitivity, or nervous system dysregulation. 3. Appetite and Eating Changes I sometimes feel a sudden urge of hunger, but when I look at food, I lose interest or appetite. Preparing food feels overwhelming or takes forever. I often end up buying food instead, eat it quickly, and it doesn’t taste good or satisfying. I rarely feel full after eating. 4. Emotional and Cognitive Changes I have no motivation or enjoyment in things I used to love (music, sports, games, movies). I don’t laugh or cry. My thoughts feel foggy, and speech feels slowed or off. Driving, watching TV, or listening to music feels unreal or unnatural. Time feels like it moves extremely slow. 5. Sexual Symptoms I have very low or no sexual desire and difficulty getting or staying hard. This started before beginning medication. I have little to no interest in sex or sexual activity and don’t experience the same physical or emotional response I used to. 6. Avoidance and Functioning I get extremely anxious before job interviews or appointments and often cancel or reschedule them. I also struggle to attend therapy sessions. Even though my family is supportive, I feel detached and alone. 7. Nicotine Use I vape regularly to try to manage stress, but it no longer helps. It feels more like a compulsion than something that calms me. I rarely drink alcohol, and when I do, it doesn’t help me relax. 8. Existential and Emotional Fears I often experience overwhelming fears about death and the possibility of not seeing my family and friends again. I feel sadness and guilt about missing out on important moments in life, such as seeing my sister and little cousins grow up, because of my current mental health struggles. 9. Dry Mouth and Digestive Discomfort I constantly have a dry mouth, even when I drink water, soda, or eat food. Drinking or eating often makes me feel bloated, nauseous, or sick afterward, even if I don’t eat much. It feels like my body isn’t processing food or hydration normally. I vape regularly, which might be making the dry mouth worse. I’ve also noticed that eating or drinking after brushing my teeth makes the dryness and nausea even more noticeable. I’ve been trying to stay hydrated and clean, but the dry mouth doesn’t go away, and it makes me feel uncomfortable all day. Please review whether this could be related to medication side effects, nicotine use, or other underlying issues. 10. Balance and Digestive Sensations Sometimes when I’m laying still in bed, it feels like the bed or my body is moving slightly, even though I’m not. It feels like an internal vibration or swaying. I also burp frequently, even when I’m sipping water slowly. It feels like my body is reacting to normal things in exaggerated ways. Please review whether these sensations could be related to anxiety, vagus nerve sensitivity, or inner ear/vestibular imbalance. 11. Compulsive Behaviors and Emotional Numbness I find myself constantly watching porn even though it doesn’t arouse or interest me anymore. The same goes for sexual activity — I don’t feel desire or connection. It feels more like a compulsive habit than something I enjoy. I also tend to stay on my phone a lot, even though it doesn’t help me feel better. Please review whether these behaviors could be linked to emotional detachment, anxiety, or a coping response related to nervous system dysregulation or medication side effects. 12. Involuntary Physical Reactions I constantly yawn throughout the day even when I’m not tired or sleepy. It happens repeatedly, and I can’t control it. It feels like my body is trying to release tension or catch its breath. It might be connected to my anxiety, medication, or body stress levels. Please review whether this could be related to nervous system overactivation, anxiety, or medication Summary This document summarizes my ongoing symptoms and current challenges for my healthcare provider. 13. Breathing Irregularities Sometimes I feel like I’m not breathing right, especially when I’m lying down trying to sleep. I often have to take a big deep breath before I can relax again or go back to sleep. It feels like my breathing rhythm gets interrupted, even when I’m not anxious at the moment. My breathing tests have come back normal, so it may be more related to anxiety or body tension. Please review whether this could be related to anxiety, diaphragm tension, sleep-related breathing irregularities, or medication effects

Cole Greene

Date posted: 25w

Advice on somatic OCD

So I’m 16 years old, currently going through my sophomore year of highschool. I’ve recently quit nicotine and weed after chronic use for about 4 years (has affected my development extremely). I quit because I wanted a better life for myself because I knew that I was using nicotine and weed for short term happiness and long term made me very depressed about this life. I was also experiencing trouble concentrating on simple tasks and what I wanted to do currently in my life. Which was learning about life and having more knowledge about life in general so i could feel more comfortable and happy in the future. So I quit nicotine I thought I was going to be able to overcome it and be more comfortable with myself knowing that I’m not in a constant loop of short term happiness, long term making me less happy overall. Although I have quit nicotine and haven’t touched it in about 3 weeks I expected to have some major withdrawals because I’m still in adolescence and used nicotine about everyday for 4 years. Sorry I’m rambling about this but through those years of always suppressing my anxiety with nicotine when anything came up that triggered it. I started noticing that on vacation in very stressful moments like at the airport and there were people around me when using the bathroom I felt as though it was nearly impossible to go but after sometime I eventually went and shrugged it off. Now that I’ve quit though I’m my 4th week it’s almost like my brain really latched onto that fear of not being able to go around people publicly (paruresis shy bladder syndrome) and that’s also what addiction does to you I’ve acknowledged. But when I started coming home from school I started thinking about not being able to pee more and more to the point i haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since which now every time i feel a slight trigger of having to use the bathroom i start obsessing over it like everything I would try and do that i usually do my brain would draw me away from it and go back to the fear of not being able to go which created a lot of anxiety and thoughts like “would if im not able to stop going” which made me think about it more and more I would just wake up with that thought in my head each day to the point where i was really thinking about killing my self because I thought i would have such a better life without nicotine and weed but ultimately made me feel like i was going crazy and I really wanted to go back to vaping and weed but i knew that this was the cycle of addiction and that i may have a more underlying problem here i need to overcome somatic ocd. I haven’t been diagnosed with it yet and I know a lot of people go through a cycle of self diagnosing. But as I’ve slowly started to mentally figure out ways to get through this obsession over peeing and fight it, it’s like my brain is now trying to look for a new bodily sensation to obsess over. My breathing. I noticed this as well while using that sometimes I would think about my breathing a little bit to much for example saying to myself am I breathing right should I breath this certain way would if I can’t stop thinking about it. But as I was thinking about that I just hit my vape talked to my brother about it and just slept it off. Now that I don’t have a vape I’ve had to go through these expierences but with it feeling more real and not really having something to run to, to suppress like my vape. I’m writing this today as I feel better to myself talking about it and opening up about it as I’m trying to not respond to this fear with anxiety and go throughout my days ignoring these obsessive thoughts leading to extreme anxiety that I don’t have anything to suppress it with anymore besides my own mental. Maybe someone here will have some more knowledge about it than I do and can give me some advice to try to keep me more motivated to deal with this ocd I feel as though I’m having so I don’t end up in a dark place. Thank you.

stacythesquid

Date posted: 19w

Health OCD flare up after quitting weed

For the past three years I've smoked marijuana nearly everyday. It helped with my anxiety and quieting my brain and helped me sleep. Recently, it began to make me feel more anxious, i would wake up nauseous and even threw up a couple of times which really triggered some health anxiety. I decided to quit because of this and i'm almost 2 weeks out from the last time I smoked. My body is slowly recovering but my brain just doesn't seem to quit it. I went to my GP a couple of weeks ago for a routine checkup and everything came back normal in my blood work and exam, yet that hasn't stopped me from completely obsessing over my health and feeling like (in my mind, not my body) i'm seriously ill- which is giving me extreme anxiety. Because of my reoccurring stomach issues my GP referred me to a GI who I had an appointment with yesterday. He was very unimpressed by everything I said and seemed like everything is pointing to IBS-which is not serious and something my mother also deals with. He ordered some extra tests to make sure I wasn't dealing with inflammation and he said he was very confident that my internal vital organs were a completely fine. I'm still waiting on those test results and his confidence should I have made me feel better but i'm still freaking out. Everybody in my life is tired of hearing about it and I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel like i'm pushing people away. I feel good and like myself when I'm distracted and doing something fun, but mornings and nights and when i'm doing something mundane it's the worst. I feel like I can feel all of these pains and sensations but I have no idea if it's real. I've even started asking Chatgpt for constant reassurance and constantly googling my symptoms. I'm in a horrible loop. I should mention that on top of quitting weed, I also just graduated college, moved back home and my boyfriend and I started the longest period of long distance we've ever had to do so i'm just not feeling like myself at all. My psychiatrist just put me on Zoloft (my vomiting and intense anxiety coincided with when i began taking Prozac again so she wanted me to try something else) I'm only on day 3 of the meds but nausea and insomnia are the two side effects im dealing with right now which is just making my anxiety so much worse before the meds have even kicked in. Does anyone have advice on how to break this cycle of constant checking-i feel like taking a deep breath has even turned into a compulsion.

Anonymous

Date posted: 7w

chest tightness with meds?

Has anyone taken sertaline/Zoloft and experienced chest tightness? wanting to throw up a bit, muscle twitches or just a weird feeling in muscles. sleeping issues, loss of appetite, sweating, headaches. I've been to my psychiatrist yesterday but I felt I didn't provide enough details about how the meds actually went and it's really bothering me that I didn't so I'm not sure what to do now and I'm nervous about some of these side effects. I have a feeling I don't want to continue on the meds but he told me to continue and prescribed me something else to increase my focus as well (I have adhd) any help? Are these side effects normal like should I wait and it'll be fine or not?

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