God and ROCD

Recently I’ve been struggling with thinking God is going to take my boyfriend away. I said I wanted to put God first in our relationship and now have been super anxious. All day I’ve thought about what if we aren’t meant to be together and God takes him away. Or if I’m starting to lose feelings because I’ve felt so weird. I don’t want to live life without him but then I start convincing myself that I’m in denial of wanting to leave him and when I try to comfort myself I think I’m in denial. It’s a horrible spiral and I don’t know how to help get myself out of it and love my boyfriend the best I can.

ocdbelowzero

Date posted: Yesterday

hey I can absolutely relate. For me it was hard to give control to God because what if his plan is different than mine? It’s scary because my girl means everything to me and I don’t want to give up control. Had a massive experience while praying some time ago. Imagine this. Maybe you would mess up the relationship on your own. I truly belive that God sees you, and he does see your love for your boyfriend. I think if you put your trust in him completely he will bring you and him even closer and lead the relationship. Fear God, but in the sense he will take your loves ones away. He loves you and loves the fact that you love him. God bless.

Anonymous

Date posted: 12h

I had this same exact problem when I was a young Christian. I married the guy! Remember that God didn't make you a robot, he wants you to learn to use your inner wisdom and judgement to make actual life decisions, which is not a guessing game. It's literally like...do we have the same values? yes then....are we moving in the same life direction...yes then...would he be a good long term partner. I'm sure there are other things you value highly and as long as the answer is yes to those questions, then it's God's will for you to make that good and wise decision yourself! The future doesn't exist yet and you have free will, so just do the best you can with it. You can't think about unknown things that you don't know...like some mysterious reason in the ether as to why God didn't chose him for you...it doesn't exist. God isn't trying to needlessly micromanage us or prevent us from every possible thing that could go wrong. What if this partner changes later? That happens in the most godly marriages. What if we find out we're more different than we think? You'll figure it out together. I do struggle with ROCD still, but oh my goodness, I see my younger self in you. As long as he loves you, he's a good person and your values align...there's nothing in your way except fear of the unknown. God trusts you with the decision and it doesn't sound like you're taking it too lightly at all, so I hope that gives you a little bit of peace <3

Emmba

Date posted: 11h

@Anonymous Thank you so much that really does help. We are also long distance so that doesn’t help. I’ve started to almost convince myself I’m falling out of love because I check my feelings so often. He’s such a good man and I don’t want to lose him. My mind has been so jumbled and filled with negative thoughts. This made me feel more at peace thank you

Anonymous

Date posted: 11h

@Emmba Ah yeah long distance is so hard. We actually were also long distance for a time and that made it so hard to make the jump to moving to his area. I moved and I still had so many doubts 🙈. Just remember all those times you focus on worrying if you're in love it makes thinking about him kind of unpleasant. It spoils things. But just the fact that you feel he a great person and you don't want to lose him...that's love. Feelings are fleeting. When you're married for more than 10 years it's pretty normal to become comfortable and not feel much at all. But you're always happy you chose them and sometimes the feelings come rushing back when you least expect it. One thing that helped me with this fear in my marriage is remembering a time where I REALLY did feel things and just allow myself to exist in those moments again and feel grateful for them. Instead of feeling shame for the lack of it. Feel how special it was. It definitely starts to come back♥️

ellij

Date posted: 22w

Gods voice Vs. OCD thoughts

I have been constantly ruminating about if God wants me to be with my boyfriend. I am so hyper fixated on Gods will for my life that I often overthink every move. I have constant “what if” thoughts or “if God wanted him in your life you wouldn’t be having these thoughts”. I can’t differentiate Gods voice with my thoughts. What if this is God speaking? I also keep seeing TikToks that say if God wanted this person in your life they wouldn’t do blah blah blah. I am just not sure what to think anymore. I want to be with my boyfriend and he wants to be with me. However, as of lately we have been having some issues because we show our love differently. Then I see these TikToks saying that the right person will love you the way you need to be loved naturally, nothing will ever need to be forced, rhat I’m forcing a rib into the wrong man, etc. and then I’m like is this God talking through these videos saying I shouldn’t be with my boyfriend? I am not sure what to think. I just feel like my mind is in a constant spiral and I get so confused.

cmax20

Date posted: 22w

ROCD

for a few days now I’ve been super anxious about my relationship. I’ve been anxious about it before but lately it’s been worse than normal. I’m in a very healthy and loving relationship, I love my boyfriend so much and he treats me so so well. The only thing is that I’ve been having scary thoughts that what if I’m lying to him and don’t actually love him? What if I don’t find him attractive? And like what if the only way to stop being anxious is to break up with him? I don’t want to leave him and I am so scared. I feel like I’m lying to him by not telling him what’s going on because he might think I’m actually going to leave him, which I’m really not going to. I have had anxiety since before we started dating and incestual and sexual ocd, then I got into a point where I started having religious ocd, and now I have ROCD on top of that I think. I’ve never been diagnosed but I’m going to therapy and figuring things out but I’m so scared. Idk what to do and I feel like if I talk to anyone they’re going to say I have to leave him.

Darkgray

Date posted: 12w

Relationship doubts

Hi, I have been experiencing the worst relationship anxiety. I have been with my boyfriend for well over 3 years. He is truly amazing and helps me in almost every way. We are both faithful Christian’s. About 7 months ago is when I began having doubts and intrusive thoughts about the relationship: “Am I attracted to him?” “Do I love him?” “Why am I doubting?” “Does God want me to leave?” And it has taken its toll on me. I am to the point now that my worries have worsened into “Do I actually want to be with him?” “How do I know if I want to be with him?” No matter how many times I tell myself that I DO want to be with him, I still question it. Can someone please help me. I don’t want to break up with him. I just can’t even trust myself anymore. I also have not been officially diagnosed with OCD. But, I relate to everything ROCD and have been diagnosed with anxiety.

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