Need to vent :(

I'm 20, but I feel so behind my peers. My mental health has caused many roadblocks, and sometimes, I'm afraid of never getting to a point where I actually feel content with where I am. For the past couple of years, life has been stagnant. I don't have a job (due to high anxiety and possibly procrastination), I haven't pursued higher education, even though I do want to, and I don't have a single friend I'm in active communication with. My best friend and I grew apart in high school (I switched to online), and although we keep in touch, we're not as close as we once were. She's across the country in another state attending college, so I only see her in-person once in a blue moon when she returns during breaks. Besides that, we respond to each other's stories, send happy birthdays and such, etc... Realistically, I know I haven't "failed" in life. I try to remind myself that there isn't just one path in life to take and that things are going to be okay, but... I don't think I fully believe it. I want to, but I often feel hopeless. OCD is one of the worst things that has ever happened to me. I'm constantly stuck in the past while trying to live in the present. I feel like I'll never be able to TRULY move on from anything. It will always find some way to reel me back into obsessing. I miss the peace and quiet when my brain wasn't constantly harassing me with horrible intrusive thoughts. I miss it so much. There's so much I want to do in life, but I feel like I'm nerfed or something lmao 💔 I genuinely experience a lot of embarrassment due to everything I talked about above... Any advice or just support would be very much appreciated. I'm just having a rough day.

IHopeWeWin

Date posted: 12h

I really feel the same way you do at 19. Something that helps me is reminding myself how debilitating of a disorder OCD can be and not necessarily using it as an excuse but as a way to help better understand why my situation looks so different in comparison to my peers. I wish I had better advice but truthfully I need some myself as I’m in a similar situation as you. With that being said I wish you the best and hope you know that we’re all here to support you on this app if you need it and I’m sure your friend would be happy to support you too despite how distant you two may have grown. I hope you’re able to get through this and know that you aren’t alone. Like my username says, I hope we win. Sorry if this is too yappy btw. I feel like I talk a bit too much in my replies sometimes.

worryywart

Date posted: 10h

this is literally *exactly* what i’m going through and it’s so frustrating and upsetting :(( i don’t have any advice but you’re not alone. i try to remind myself i’m too young to really have everything figured out i guess

grace321

Date posted: 10h

I’m sorry you’re going through this. Expectations about where we are supposed to be a different milestones can feel really debilitating, but in reality, there is no perfect timeline and we’re all doing the best we can. I’m 30 and don’t have a ton of savings, don’t have kids yet, still renting, and am still working through a lot of mental health challenges. I’ve found that one of the best things is to be kind to yourself and where you’re at. And as for the things you are wanting to do, it’s really really hard, but a small step can sometimes make a huge change. Starting is always the hardest thing and you never have to do it all at once, but it can make a huge difference. Picking one thing and trying it is a great place to start. ❤️and trying new things can lead to community and connections too.

BigGyro09

Date posted: 4h

It can be really hard to navigate life when you're given these expectations from society. Whether it's from school, friends, family, etc. I think it would help to just think about what you want out of your life and not what other people say you should have. 20 years old is extremely young and this is usually the part of life where you're figuring a lot of things out for yourself in adulthood. I'm 24 and it's more or less the same. I have ideas of what I want in life but it can be daunting and tiresome to navigate day to day because of comparisons and expectations. It can really help to just focus deeply on what it is you value in life, what you care about, and transforming that into a purpose. You're definitely not alone on this:)

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