I’m very depressed

I’ve been struggling with intrusive thoughts and OCD triggered by my younger brother. He keeps saying things about our childhood that make me feel guilty, scared, and anxious, even though I know logically I didn’t do anything wrong. For example: • He accused me of being inappropriate when I gave him a kiss on the cheek as a kid. He said he thought I might touch him or do something bad, even though it was innocent and in front of our parents. • He brings up times I accidentally walked in on him in the bathroom to get my phone and uses it against me, exaggerating it as if I intended something bad. • He sometimes changes his story, which makes me question my own memory and feel unsure of what actually happened. • He often smirks or laughs when saying these things, which makes it even harder for me to cope. • Some adults have said his behavior is manipulative. He’s 11, and I’m 17 with severe OCD, so being accused of things I didn’t do really triggers my anxiety. • I’m terrified he might tell my mom or friends and make it sound worse than it is, even though my mom knows I wouldn’t hurt him. • I also worry about sharing personal things online, like on YouTube, because I’m afraid he might hear or see something and use it against me. • These situations trigger my OCD because I care about being a good sister and fear that I might have done something bad I can’t remember. • I struggle with the urge to repeatedly ask him for reassurance about what he remembers, even though I know I shouldn’t, because it makes my anxiety worse

Anonymous

Date posted: 15h

So kids sometimes get a kick out of making false accusations especially if they get a reaction out of you. Sounds like a very dishonest immature child that is still growing up. To protect you don’t be alone with him if you can help it. I’ve worked with foster kids who would threaten staff with false accusations all the time, so we had to have a “witness” another adult there at all times for our own protection. As far as your OCD don’t feed it by checking or ruminating. You need to say maybe maybe not to yourself, but to your brother limit interaction to what can be seen by others purely to give him less ability to lie

Anonymous

Date posted: 15h

Don’t ask him for reassurance. He’s a child and doesn’t have the maturity anyway to reassure you. To him your fears are funny. Everytime the urge to ask him comes up laugh internally and say maybe maybe not to whatever the fear is. If OCD says you hurt him or did something inappropriate your response should be maybe you did and there is no answer that will ever be good enough. You don’t need to figure this out right now.

andrea_sam730

Date posted: 15h

@Anonymous Thank you so much because it’s so frustrating because literally anyone can tell me right now. I murdered someone I would believe them because like I feel like what if I just have really bad memory and I can’t remember and that’s my fear with my little brother like I just worried that he may make up something one day and I have a fear of like it being true so I’m gonna try my best to refrain from asking him for reassurance. It’s just extremely painful when he says stuff like this and he doesn’t realize how Badly or hurts me like I’ve been extremely depressed because of it. :( Ty for believing in me

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond