had a disgusting dream

17+ PLS!! I had such a disgusting dream of doing something so so disgusting like so disgusting that i can’t even believe it was something i dreamed about. then when i woke up ï couldnt stop thinking about that specific thing that happened in my dream and now i’m feeling guilty that i was picturing it in my mind, now my minds telling me i pleasured myself to that dream when i woke up and it’s really getting to me, how could i have such an awful disgusting dream like that. the dream was actually super specific and disgusting and i’m so worried because people say dreams are unconscious desires even though i can’t see myself liking what happened in the dream :(

StayCalm

Date posted: 6d

I never heard that dreams are unconscious desires. So many people have told me they had weird dreams of like hooking up with family members and weird stuff. I don’t believe it has anything to do with anyone’s true desires I think it’s just pieces of saved thoughts in your mind over your lifespan that just get thrown together randomly and there’s no meaning to it and it’s out of your control. Your OCD is telling you that you’re weird for it but it’s tricking you. It’s normal and has nothing to do with who you are and anything you’re interested in.

dwestiny

Date posted: 6d

@StayCalm Thank you so much, seriously! I think whats getting to me so much is the dream was actually something so specific and gross about POCD and it’s something i never experienced before today. It makes me feel so guilty and upset even though it was just a dream and then my mind makes it worse by making up that i liked it and stuff. It’s like i can say right now that dream was not something i desired but then it’s like a fear in my head that maybe i don’t realise it’s what i want. the dream was something ive been having intrusive and obsessive thoughts about recently and i guess it truly makes me realise how much i think these things

StayCalm

Date posted: 6d

When I first started getting OCD intrusive thoughts like that I had ones about that theme when I saw a child sometimes also and it was scary and now I don’t have that anymore, but I have harm OCD all the time which is also very scary. I consider those to be two of the worst themes. OCD will play every trick on you possible to make you believe that it’s you and you’re a bad person like no matter what you come up with to defend yourself will be some way or some loophole that will lead back to you being a weird or bad that’s just how horrible it is and it makes no sense whatsoever literally irrational. I once woke up from a nap and didn’t expect my daughter to be sleeping and I kept watching her just to make sure she was breathing because those are other OCD things I do and I could see that she was breathing, but I had to keep watching her and watching her and watching her and make sure she was breathing and at one point in my mind, I said well what if I did something to her and I don’t remember it and she’s not alive. I mean that’s just insanity and I can sit here now saying that’s insanity but by tonight I’ll probably do something like that again in my mind it doesn’t make any sense how you could be such a normal person who is fully aware that that’s really crazy and still get caught up in the behaviors or thoughts that are so out there.

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