Is there anyone here like me?

I can't seem to get rid of the feeling that I have to look at a picture of a person (my sister) whenever I see her and that I automatically imagine taboo acts, because I have a feeling as soon as I see a trigger, or hear a specific voice (sound) And of course I get cramps or a feeling of false attraction..or whatever it's called..why is this happening? why can't I stop... why do I imagine it even if I know it seems real to me...☹️

@sophiaevidal

Date posted: 15h

Just a reminder that ocd also includes intrusive images it just another curveball it tries to throw at you. Try to sit through it and ride the wave the distress will lower eventually

Anonimus ME 🦋

Date posted: 14h

@@sophiaevidal I don't know if they're intrusive when I imagine them myself. I can't resist..and every time it's the same outcome, I feel like a real attraction to it..and despair.

@sophiaevidal

Date posted: 14h

@Anonimus ME 🦋 Well i can't reassure you if it is intrusive or not but I can say that it seems that this causes a lot of distress for you so I think it looks like a classic case of the subtype POCD which I experienced and it is awful to deal with but you can manage it by letting the distress be there and letting those thoughts, images, feelings come automatically and not stop them. I know it os hard to do that but that lead to long term relief even though it might take time to habituate

Anonimus ME 🦋

Date posted: 13h

@@sophiaevidal that part, where I'm supposed to sit with it and not watch anything. That's where I fall! I always look, then some feeling starts, then I imagine the images more and more deeply. Like a drug addict sitting next to drugs... I'm either weak or stupid

Anonymous

Date posted: 14h

It’s an intrusive thought. You don’t wanna think about it and you’re so worried about thinking about it that your mind grabs on any thread of emotion and considers it real. The point is you haven’t done anything wrong to her and if it causes you this much distress you clearly wouldn’t in the future. Remember that.

Anonimus ME 🦋

Date posted: 13h

@Anonymous thanks, but it's very hard for me to understand when I go into a spiral, everything gets mixed up...

identikit

Date posted: 13h

Coming from someone who has taboo thoughts in their pure obsessive OCD, this sounds very familiar. I'd remind you that what you're likely interpreting as *wanting* to have these feelings is instead the rising obsession. Things like the horrifying pure O is a cycle of "mind supplies horrifying idea" -> "you are horrified and believe you're a bad person for the horrifying thought" -> "you participate in a compulsion to get the thought away" -> "the obsession does not actually go away and can become a habit" I've been there. All that's ever worked for me is self-practiced ERP. Just tolerating obsessive thoughts is hard. The thing is, it's not real. Quietly conceding that and trying to do anything else at all is the only way I'm able to make it.

Anonimus ME 🦋

Date posted: 12h

@identikit it's hard for me. I have an urge to look at a trigger face, for example, and associate images with taboos and thoughts. I won't, tell myself, but the uncertainty of what that feeling in me means is killing me. It's probably panic disguised as what you say, but my brain identifies it as sexual attraction, and then I fall into despair.. I really used to think that I'm stubborn like an idiot when I won't and can't believe what doctors and people tell me! I think that what's happening to me, I can't even convey well when I'm talking, that I'm the only one

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