I tried breaking up

This is my experience everyone's experience is different and no one can tell you what to do, only you can make the decsion thats best. I tried breaking up I said I can't keep doing this and going on. The plan was to do it today. As I decided, my boyfriend told me if you do this there's no coming back if you do this we have to be done. And I felt sure then I sat at the door for 10 minutes deciding. I felt anxious and afraid of what would happen if I did, and I thought if I did I'm gonna wanna come back probably. I realized that being with him IS what I wanted, and that whdther I break up or not I'm going to face doubts and second thoughts. I will keep with my decisin its just the fear of not making the right one but no one can tell you that. Doubr will happen either way and I cried looking at him i just said I cant do it. I cannot make the permanent decision and say no. So I have not as strong sexual and physical attraction it depends on what he wears smells hormones my day etc. I love him and thats my commitment and I have to stick to it regardless of feelings. You cannot let your feelings lead you in life. My decision is to work on this and not give up

Cat-Mom

Date posted: 2d

I was where you were. Bringing myself to try to do it made me realize how much him not being in my life would break me. I’m proud of you. You’ll get through this!

sharky 🦈

Date posted: 2d

I needed to see this right now. I'm currently feeling very similar and have been having the feeling to leave him. It's not urgent anymore and it's kinda just heavy and weighing on me. To the point that it makes me feel like it's no longer a compulsion and actually how I feel. Our situations aren't entirely the same, but rocd is difficult no matter the case. I hope things get better for you 🦈✨

Cat-Mom

Date posted: Yesterday

@sharky 🦈 You’ve likely exhausted your brain! I’ve gotten the same way. It’s common as we habituate to the thoughts

North_Char

Date posted: Yesterday

I’ve been reading your posts, and I’m so sorry your struggling with this. It must be so exhausting. I know you mentioned once that you can’t afford therapy - so here are some options: . Community mental health centers . University training clinics . Open Path Psychotherapy Collective . EAP’s . Call 211 I really hope any of those things I listed help, they are cheap or free therapy/similar options. I really think the best think you should do right now is seek a relationship counselor for you and your partner. That way you can work it through together and decide what it best. I’m sure you have talked about it with your partner, so I would do that. Also, I noticed in your bio it says Christian, you can always pray about it, I’m sure you have but, I like to pray personally for Gods will to be done and for Him to guide me through my decisions. Im gonna be brutally honest here; I was in a relationship, where I kinda had similar thoughts and doubts, it ended for the better, and after I prayed for Gods will to be done. And I came to realize, I think, I LOVED him but was not necessarily IN love with him. Maybe that could be the same for you. But then again maybe not (just thought I should share that) :) Im not you, but I feel for you, just remember OCD is a liar, and it’s completely normal to have doubts. What’s meant to be will work out. I hope you find peace with your relationship, and I hope this was helpful lol. I wish the best for both of you. :)

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