Terrified.

Ok so, right now my brain is in panic mode, not sure what triggered it. I’ve been opening up to my mom more and my sister, and i’m starting up ERP and intense therapy again. My mom has a couple ideas on why I am in panic mode right now. I’ve seen the movie “Obsession” 3 times and as much as I loved the movie I think it triggered something. But also i’m not sure and what if I’m just blaming the movie for what i’m feeling. That uncertainty is getting debilitating. For more context I was in a weird like situationship that I got way too attached to and I was just ignoring the fact that she didn’t want something more with me. I have struggles with attachment and relationships and ROCD. Now recently i’ve been talking to this girl and we have so much in common and we’ve only hung out two times and both times we just talk about our problems and life together. And my brain is telling me i’m “trauma dumping” or “love bombing” and I just don’t know. She knows like everything about me i think, i honestly can’t remember everything that i’ve opened up to her about. But my brain is constantly on a loop of what ifs and I just don’t know what to do. I really like her and she understands me and listens to me i’m just terrified of doing too much. Does anyone have any strategies i can use to snap out of my spirals? I try the “maybe, maybe not” but sometimes it just doesn’t work and im honestly just losing hope.

CrappiePappy

Date posted: 17h

Keep going, you’re doing great! When I really started confronting my ocd/fears my anxiety went way up. After a while of consistent work and self graciousness it improved dramatically. A lot of prayer also always helps.

Anonymous

Date posted: 15h

@CrappiePappy Yeah i try to pretend like it doesn’t exist which definitely doesn’t help. Thank you ❤️

Anonymous

Date posted: 18h

Totally relate, my therapist used the “they could not …, it is possible” and told me to just keep replaying that over and over. I would say take it easy on the over sharing and love bombing (I do it on accident)- I think we tend to crave connection but the only way a true connection can be built is through time, trust, and consistency. It’s been extremely hard to keep my daily routine separate from my new crush but have found it to be extremely important to try.

Anonymous

Date posted: 15h

@Anonymous Thank you ❤️

orange_kiwi

Date posted: 15h

Honestly I think the best way to help with your fears is to just ask her next time you see her, "Do you feel like I over share with you? Do our talks make you feel uncomfortable or like I'm doing too much?" because getting an answer from her about how she feels will allow you to either correct your behavior, or continue it without as many worries. I've definitely put myself in this situation before, and it has always helped me to flat out ask, no matter how scary that can be. I also understand why Obsession could be messing you up a bit. I love that movie but watching it so much made me look at my actions and wonder if I'm ever over the top or if I look crazy. I think it's for sure a possibility that it contributed to your worries, but either way my advice is the same.

Anonymous

Date posted: 15h

@orange_kiwi Thank you, I’ll ask her the next time we hang out. Yeah the movie probably is messing with me.

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