Been a while

Haiii! I’m baaackkk!!! I saw you had no replies so I decided to write you this: I’m really glad to hear you’re doing better after everything you’ve been through. And honestly, I can understand why this would feel especially frustrating after having SO-OCD quiet for so long. One thing that really stood out to me is how OCD seems to be taking your new friendship and turning it into a question you feel like you have to solve: “What if I like him?”“What if I’m gay?” “What does this reaction mean?” Then the anxiety itself becomes something OCD analyzes as evidence, which creates even more anxiety. • Here’s my advice: I think the hardest but most helpful part is trying not to use your feelings, anxiety, physical reactions, or ability to respond in a certain way as tests. You don't have to prove to OCD that you are or aren't attracted to anyone. Every time you test yourself, analyze your reaction, compare how you feel around men versus women, or repeatedly check whether you can respond physically, OCD can just come back with another “what if?” And then became a compulsion that feeds the cycle. Instead, when the thought comes up, you could try something like: “Maybe, maybe not. I’m not going to figure this out right now,” and then continue talking to your friend or doing whatever you were doing. I know this feels uncomfortable but Its a better approach than feeding the loop. • Reminder: And please remember that anxiety can affect your body and that physical responses aren't a perfect measurement of attraction anyway. You don't need to turn them into evidence for or against anything. The fact that you're anxious about losing your friendship or that OCD is interfering with something you enjoy doesn't mean you need to solve the question. You deserve to be able to have friends without OCD putting every interaction under a microscope. • Recommendations: Since you've already been through such a difficult period with OCD, I'd really recommend bringing this specific relapse back to your OCD therapist/mental-health professional too, especially since you've dealt with the psychosis fears before. You don't have to handle the whole thing alone, I’m here too! <3 And seriously, congratulations on making a new friend after such a rough period. Don't let OCD convince you that you have to analyze the friendship instead of actually enjoying it. ❤️ Oh and I relate to this a lot too… I mean, I don’t have H-OCD but when I try to have a friendship with a male (me as a woman) I always geta anxious about me catching feelings. I have attachment issues so it’s probably not because of OCD itself only, but I wanted to let you know that you’re not alone! <3 Take care. ❤️ - @starlight.seeker.stellaria