I was just wondering if this is normal. I’ve had OCD for a year and 4 months now. When I get a thought, like what if someone does something to me (to do with my obsession) then I think if they did it to me what if I went along with that, then I will start to analyse myself and my body and think well if you move your head or body a certain way that means you want it now, then I’ll actually do it? And I feel terrible. I don’t know if this is just me or if I’m crazy. Then I’ll feel the need to confess it. For some reason my mind just thinks it should analyse my action in that moment as soon as I’ve had the thought, even though it has nothing to do with it. Sorry this may be a bit confusing ?

Yes very relatable :) can I ask you what obsession it's about maybe I can give you some insight. Its okay if you want to keep it for yourself ofcourse

Hmmm I don't have ROCD myself (not yet at least pfff), so I can't help you with that unfortunately. Thanks for sharing though. Try to keep reminding you it's not you but your OCD who shapes you in a certain way. And I know this is really hard, I'm having trouble with it myself. But stay strong :)

It gets rid of the guilt temporarily but then the next thing comes up and I have to tell him that :(

Ugh it’s horrible isn’t it, how does it happen for you? It’s likely I’ve dealt with it myself, it’s good to finally relate to someone on this, this is the biggest killer in my ocd. Like I’ll think about doing that thing then if I actually think they’re attractive it’s as if my mind is telling me to do that ‘semi act’ like move my head or whatever, because I should and I get thoughts telling me that I’m attracted to that person then another thought saying ‘are you really gonna be with your boyfriend forever?’ And try to convince me to do something ‘semi’. I feel I have no self control. I mean I’m sure it’s anxiety and just general thoughts of thinking someone is attractive but like my mind then jumps to the whole what if you cheat? And then it’ll say ‘what are you never going to kiss anyone else again?’ And all that stuff and pushing me towards that. It really sucks. I just try to convince myself that if it were on the very odd chance someone did lunge at me I would then think wait wait wtf no. But it’s hard to convince myself that when I keep doing these small things. It feels like it’s me. And telling my boyfriend I feel I need to tell him every detail and my morals behind it so he knows me for what I really am/want. It completely sucks. I can confess and just say it won’t happen again but then when the moment comes it happens again. It’s like I can’t keep a promise. Any thoughts or advice on this ^? Thanks so much for replying and reading this !

^ sorry that’s so long it’s just good to know there’s someone who is finally like me! Haven’t spoke to someone about this before and they’ve understood.

Ofc, basically I have relationship OCD, my biggest fear is cheating on my boyfriend. I think what set it off was when I was younger I had a lot to drink when I was also with him 3 years ago and did make out with someone else (before my onset of OCD). I decided at the time after talking to friends and family to not mention it as I was very drunk. I kind of went on and forgot about it, anyway a year and a half later I suddenly had a big argument with my boyfriend about something and I thought he broke up with me and would never talk to me again, from that moment onwards I started to fear about this thing I did in the past and couldn’t get the thought out of my head to tell him, I had to confess, we are over it now, but now I’m worried I could do that again, and constantly analysing myself to not cheat and believing all the time that someone will ‘lunge’ at me or touch me inappropriately and I’ll ‘go along with it’, also I analyse my intentions all the time about most of what I say and do.

It’s even more annoying when someone is actually attractive, because I’ll think I’m more likely to cheat if I think they are attractive, I also doubt my relationship so I worry about my boyfriend not being good enough for me and he seems to bug me a lot, I will have thoughts like ‘was that too boring’ ‘was that too uptight’ etc etc. It seems to play on things that always annoyed me before I had OCD but I just sort of saw them as his funny ways and got on with it, now I’m like under pressure to hurry up and figure out if this relationship is right for me otherwise I’m leading him on

Sorry it’s so much to read

No problem, does he know you suffer frofrom OCD?

Yeah he’s aware, when I confess things to him I do feel really bad like why is he still with me lol