- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Thanks everyone!! All your posts helped a ton. The anxiety did go down a lot. It helped for me to acknowkledge that I have done what I can and disgust is not going to harm me. It’s hard but I’m trying to move on. Thanks again for all the tips
- Date posted
- 5y
Disgust is a harder emotion to habituate to than anxiety. Be patient with yourself. It's going to take a longer time without doing rituals for the feeling to fade
- Date posted
- 5y
I know this feeling so well, not with blood anymore but other things like toxic chemicals etc. I know how it is to feel like something is “on you” and feels disgusting even if it isn’t a danger. I can say that with blood, germs etc I had to start sitting with it and exposing myself to it intentionally without washing afterwards. The exposure is so hard but after a couple months I would go to clean a bathroom and forget to even wear gloves until after I was done... or feelings of anxiety would sometimes come up when I was around blood and I would almost instantly let it go and forget about my OCD. ERP if consistently practiced really does help ! When I’m unsure if it’s my “OCD brain” talking or my “rational brain” I simply ask myself “how would someone else react ?”
- Date posted
- 5y
This is my absolute worst ocd fear as well, Lark, so I get how you feel. Focus on that you've taken a shower w/soap, which means that you are clean, fact! (even if it feels like you're not). Most people probably wouldn't even notice, they would have just gone on with their day (and maybe not have taken a shower until the next morning). I understand how disgusting it must have been (not only ocd people would think that). But try telling yourself that "yes, that was gross, but I took a shower and I'm clean now, so I'm moving on from this." :)
- Date posted
- 5y
God I fucking hate people. Dirty bastards!!!!!!!!! No fucking need for that howling behaviour, why don’t they clean after themselves it’s grotesque I’m sorry you’re feeling this way I would too if it’s any consolation. I’m not sure if any other techniques but people always say the anxiety decreases eventually so hang in there ?
- Date posted
- 5y
Thanks guys. As an update, yes my anxiety has come down a lot. BUT. I’m still feeling dirty and I’m sure when I shower tonight I’m going to be long again. Even washing the clothes I wore, it may take me many times. I’m definitely frustrated that I didn’t check or notice it since I typically do and I’m frustrated that people are so rude to not clean up but trying not to focus on that. It’s so hard as even now I feel like I can still feel it in my hand which I know is not true. It’s almost like I was forced into a high exposure.
- Date posted
- 5y
Sometimes that happens, no matter what our fears are. If possible, redireyrhe anger at the person to be anger at the OCD and use it to fuel doing the opposite of what OCD wants
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w
I'm keeping it light hearted but I really desperately need some help. Just to preface this is very tmi. I thought it was just gonna be a quick bathroom stuff. No! That would be silly of course, so number two decided to screw things up ROYALLY. And please bear with me because I am coping with humour 😭😭. So I went, but sometimes, tmi, I struggle to.... Get it all. Out. If you know what I mean. Which is pretty awful to the point I'm like genuinely praying. Because you can't clean up properly if you're not done. So I'm in the bathroom, trying, for over half an hour. And I finally give up pretty much and try and clean up. Oh no, that was a huge mistake. But what else could I do? It was so messy that I wanted to just get in the shower and be done with it. Onto the things I'm worrying about I guess. On the tp (tmi, I'm WARNING 😭😭) it was.... Messy, and there were very loose specks on the tp. Which is an issue, because I used wet wipes which needs to be binned and not flushed, so I have to carry the tp-wipe combo over to the bin, which means carrying it over where my legs are, and thus where my clothes also are. I hate it. I'm now paranoid specks fell into my underwear! Great! Love it. I'm also paranoid specks or just #2 in general went on my hand. And, believe me, with the state of things, it was POSSIBLE. So when I'm finally done and wash my hands, of course that isn't going to feel like enough. I have really short nails, so short they're painful, and I'm always terrified stuff gets under them. So, I use a nail brush while washing my hands. I also filed them down (which HURT) because I'm convinced that could get rid of anything underneath them. But it still doesn't feel enough. Because I have loose skin and hangnails around my nails, and I'm paranoid as well that stuff gets under dry skin. Not to mention my hands are so dry from washing that they're cracked and flaky and they peel, so I am worried that #2 or dirt gets under the flakes of skin. I know it sounds stupid, but I am so scared. Usually it feels irrational but it was such a state that I'm convinced there must be a speck of it on me somewhere. On my hands. And I'm terrified. I know I need to accept uncertainty but I'm struggling right now.
- Date posted
- 18w
This is a repost, only because the last post had no responses lol. Please if you have any advice share. I’ve been trying hard to sit with the feeling of anxiety. Actually that’s the problem, recently I’ve been trying to sit with the thought (and I’m able to for a few hours or until the next morning) and then my anxiety comes back so strong and it’s like I need to clean everything off. I see images of gross laundry getting on everything or my hand and then I need to clean everything off to un contaminate it. Sometimes the thought happens later at night so I just sleep through and the next morning I will wake up with intense anxiety about contamination. That happened yesterday and I had to clean everything off and since then I’ve been traumatized so I’ve been doing compulsions like avoiding the bathroom and being around people so I know I couldn’t have done anything wrong. Actually recently my biggest compulsion has been recording every time I get up to go eat, etc so that I know I couldn’t have done anything. Any advice or help???
- Date posted
- 15w
This is a long one lol but basically, a couple of weeks ago I went to the toilet (#2, sorry for the tmi). Let's just say it was messy. I remember that a speck of.. #2.. Fell off the piece of toilet paper. This was probably the worst thing that could ever happen. I can't remember clearly but I'm pretty sure my jeans were on the floor underneath near where the speck could have fallen. There was also a towel. I don't know exactly where it fell as it was so small, but I made sure both the towel and the jeans went in the laundry basket and I cleaned the floor near there. Fast forward to like the next day. My mum does most of the laundry, so she will have picked up all the towels and clothes from the laundry basket and taken them to the wash. The problem is the speck. I don't know where it went but if it was on the towel and she picked it up.... Thus, contaminated mum. And she also puts clothes away that are dry. I remember that day she put my hoodie in my wardrobe, and I haven't worn it since because I feel it is contaminated. I haven't worn the clothes that have touched the hoodie. This leaves me with not a lot of clothes. And today I finally snapped and picked up a sweatshirt that had maybe touched the hoodie. And now I'm just sat here spiralling, wearing it. What if it touched the speck? What if the speck touched my mum and then touched the hoodie which then touched the sweatshirt I'm wearing? Please I'm so scared.
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