WeCanDoThis
- Date posted
- 5y
AnonymousAnonymous
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- 5y
I fear the same but at a point I think we all have to face out fears either one way or another. But please don't be alarmed. This takes time probably and we'll get through hopefully
WeCanDoThisWeCanDoThis
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- 5y
Yeah. You’re right. I just feel so lost. It makes me realize why it was so easy to accept uncertainty the first time around. That’s easier than the idea of taking responsibility for being attracted to kids...
AnonymousAnonymous
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- 5y
@WeCanDoThis Yes same. At first I was able to accept uncertainty like a pro but I relapsed after a guy called me gay (I have HOCD). That day was horrible honestly. I feel lost too and my life's breaking apart almost :(
Ginger77Ginger77
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- 5y
@WeCanDoThis that's not a good feeling but look outside your ocd and say hey would I actually ever do this
AnonymousAnonymous
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@Ginger77 I know I wouldn't when I really see it that way but my brains like "you sure" "what if you do" and it's distressing becsuse I don't want to act on my fears at all ?
WeCanDoThisWeCanDoThis
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- 5y
@chamomile Same
AnonymousAnonymous
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@WeCanDoThis I know!! I hate my HOCD and every OCD on the existence with a burning passion
WeCanDoThisWeCanDoThis
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- 5y
Like I get scared trying to accept that I’m a pedophile, and go back to the “oh, well I’ll just accept uncertainty” because that’s easier and hurts less to admit. This could be avoidance of the inevitable.
kleigh21kleigh21
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- 5y
That’s really triggering ^
AnonymousAnonymous
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- 5y
That above comment really is triggering. I really hope the the girl didn't see that above comment :(
kleigh21kleigh21
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@chamomile It really makes me mad when someone comments triggering posts, like do they think we want this? No this is hell everyday for sufferers.
AnonymousAnonymous
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@kleigh21 Yes!! But they wouldn't know since they aren't in OUR shoes. If they were they'd know what kind of perpetual hell this damn thing is :(
kleigh21kleigh21
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- 5y
@chamomile It even makes you question if you do want this sometimes. But in reality this is hell. Everyday.
AnonymousAnonymous
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- 5y
@kleigh21 Yes!!! There have been so many people that told me "what's wrong being gay?" (I have HOCD) and that triggers me like my Identity is being questioned, such a basic thing about me and you say what's WRONG??
kleigh21kleigh21
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- 5y
@chamomile Exactly ! People don’t understand. That’s not what you truly want but you always question that, and everything else you think!
AnonymousAnonymous
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@kleigh21 I had never questioned myself but I've done so many things that make me anxious and I worry till I'm eating myself away and then someone says something triggering like "it's ok if you're gay!! It's 2020!!" Like I understand they're somehow "trying" to help but it just isn't working instead it's doing the opposite ?
WeCanDoThisWeCanDoThis
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- 5y
@chamomile I did see it, but I tried to work it into my ERP and acceptance practice. It made me scared, but it’s okay.
AnonymousAnonymous
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@WeCanDoThis What did you see?
WeCanDoThisWeCanDoThis
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@chamomile Oh, the triggering comment, probably should have clarified lol
AnonymousAnonymous
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- 5y
Oh ok, but yeah those don't work for me. You won't the amount of times I've cried seeing those types of comments and really felt like I was gay and biologically bound to be with a woman
AnonymousAnonymous
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- 5y
That's was meant for the above reply oops
WeCanDoThisWeCanDoThis
- Date posted
- 5y
Please don’t reassure me though
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