- Username
- KatieKat
- Date posted
- 6y ago
That’s terrible. I’m really sorry. Are there things he’s deathly afraid of? Next time he pokes fun at you, do the same with his fear. I don’t really like this method but people don’t take OCD seriously and the only way he will understand is if he’s in our shoes. We’re dealing with misfired alert which puts us in fight or flight mode.
First definitely identify when your mentally compulsions. Then read statements that will trigger your anxiety. You can also record yourself saying “i am not real. No one is real”. Keep listening so you can’t reassure yourself. Try it for five to fifteen minutes (depending on how much you can do). The important thing is to do the exposures and not compulse. So if you can do fifteen minutes one day but only five minutes next day without ritualize get then do what you can. If you ritualized then “spoil” yourself by exposing to your fears. I hope that helps.
I deal with this constantly! My husband thinks it’s funny and will try to make me think that he’s not real. Then I start crying and he feels bad.
I understand. But he still shouldn’t make you cry just because he doesn’t understand it. You’re already crying from the OCD bully. Have you tried showing him videos about what OCD is about? Maybe if he sees or reads it might help and open up his mind? I’m not trying to attack anyone here but it upsets me when other sufferers aren’t taken seriously. The last thing we need is mocked and ridiculed.
Oh okay. I’m sorry about that. But definitely sit down with him or just send him links so he can look at it when he can. I’m sorry for making assumptions.
I’m so sorry @katieKAT. When you feel you’re about to have a panic attack try the breathing exercise. It will help. Focus on your breathing. In through your nose and count to five. Then slowly release out of your mouth and count to seven. The exhaling should be longer than when you inhale oxygen. Also let your diaphragm expand, not your chest. You can also try ginger candy. It helps me with nausea from anxiety.
We have the same type of OCD :) I have existential OCD that was triggered by a chronic episode of DP/DR after constant stress and illness over other OCD themes. Its hard. But I’m getting better. My ERP looks like this, I say these phrases over and over: - maybe I’m not real - maybe my family isnt real - maybe my friends aren’t real - maybe im in a coma Etc, etc. I start at 30 seconds of doing this, then a minute. Then two, then four, then eight, it gets easier I swear. DP/DR is probably the worst of it. I like to think of it as severe mental exhaustion due to insular thinking and self monitoring. I mean, that’s basically what it is after all. Start thinking of it as a big scary disorder and you’re probably gonna get even more panicked. Hang in there :)
@KatieKAT I’m preparing to see a new therapist soon, but I’ve done a lot of ERP on my own, after getting clearance from a therapist that I’m doing it right :)
The struggle is so real guys. ? I don’t have existential OCD but that sounds intense. Glad there are others on here too who can support you. One of my obsessions lately has been, “What if you don’t really have OCD and this is all a lie?” Sigh..this disorder is so stupid and insidious, trying to get me to doubt a professional expert OCD diagnosis.
Do you have any compulsions? Or is this pure-O? Or do you do a mental compulsion?
Mental compulsions, trying to reassure myself that I’m real, that I can trust this is reality, etc.
Existential OCD. Definitely not the kind of OCD the public has much awareness of. Maybe we will change that in the future. :) What is DP/DR?
When you’re mentally compulsing *
I think it is just hard for him to understand that I will actually believe these things. I’m starting to open up more with him about my ocd, and I think he’s starting to understand better.
I think I may have worded that wrong- he’s only done it like two times. In his defense I laugh when I’m telling him about it (i laugh when I’m nervous) so he probably thinks I’m joking... ya know, until the tears start.
Im honestly scared for him to know what it’s really like
May I ask why?
@MeMeMe, and CrazyCatLady, thanks for sharing! This has been so horrible. I’ve been spiking so bad. I freak out, because I worry I might just stop believing I am real, and completely waste my life. Also, I have company coming tomorrow, and I’ve had such bad derealization, I worry about panic attacks.
@TabbyKitty, thank you so much!! I can’t tell you how much it means to know I’m not the only one struggling with this theme. I’ve had so many different ones, but this has seemed like the worst with all the DP/DR feelings, and questioning if I exist. Ugh. I’m a Christian, and this has made it so hard to feel my faith or anything else that I’ve felt like I’ve known for sure before OCD. You’re right, we don’t need to be scared of DP/DR. It really does come form total mental exhaustion and stress. Back when I felt normal and didn’t deal with this, if something extremely embarrassing happened, I’d have DP/DR for a few minutes only, like everyone else. It doesn’t help that I haven’t been sleeping the last 2 nights because of my sensitive stomach. Tell me, do you see a therapist, or do you know enough now to just do ERP aim your own? Hugs, and thanks again! :)
*sorry for the typos. ;)
@TabbyKitty, do you feel like the existential OCD has made you question literally everything, like even your own logic? I feel like I’m always questioning how I can know anything, especially when the DP/DR is bad.
@KatieKAT absolutely. Its the first OCD theme I’ve had that made me feel genuinely insane
@TabbyKitty, Thank you for getting back to me. I’ve been obsessing big time today, and trying to show myself these thoughts are irrational. I’m really struggling with that aspect of it. Did you ever feel like there were real reasons to worry about if you didn’t exist? I understand that the very act of worrying is evidence you do exist. I know it will sound dumb to you, but even though I’m a Christian, and God wouldn’t trick us, I’ve worried even our thinking could be an illusion, like we just “think we’re thinking”, even though that’s a contradictory statement. Did you deal with any of these things?
What are some ERP exercises I can do about meaning/worth/reality? For example these last couple of weeks I’ve been struggling with intrusive thoughts about if this life/what I’m experiencing is real, intrusive thoughts such as “this doesn’t mean anything” or “what’s the point” Etc when I’m just trying to live, etc. I feel like if I’m thinking about it and searching for an answer too much I’ll go into a panic :(
I can’t tell if this is existential OCD or if something else is going on, but I’ve been having a serious existential crisis-type episode for the past week. Starting with the realization of my own mortality and an impending sense of doom, hopelessness, pointlessness, and despair, which led me down a path of spirituality (mix of Buddhist and Hindu beliefs). That’s in the realm of “normal” for me, and I was feeling amazing afterwards, I felt like everything finally made sense, like I was at peace with the world, nature, and my soul. But then the intrusive thoughts started(about when I realized technically anything is possible in this seemingly endless universe). At first they were about this whole world being fake, that everyone was in on it except for me, that I was being tested to see if I had learned enough/been a good enough person in this life. Soon realized that this wasn’t logical, since I was going off the idea that nothing was real, but if no one was real they wouldn’t be able to lie to me. Then it transitioned into pure solipsism, which terrified me to the very depths of my soul, at which point I felt suicidal (basically “if nothing is real what’s the point?” Kind of thinking) but after a couple of days of ruminating, I realized the flaws in this logic, as well, and was comfortable in the idea that this was false. Which brings me to now. It’s sort of a mixture of the two, I now have an intrusive thought that there’s some force that created this world to test me, but that no one is “real”, that they have the appearance of being conscious like me, but are being controlled by an outside force, that they’re like robots with the appearance of having a soul, but are just programmed to seem that way, that I’ll not be able to see them again when I die and return to the pool of consciousness since they never existed in the first place. I know in my rational mind this isn’t true, but it just keeps pounding in my head that it’s possible, so I can never assume it isn’t the truth, and it’s making me feel so hopeless. What’s the point if everything is a lie? I feel like my world is crumbling beneath my feet, like I’m drowning. The worst part was that I was fine this morning, but was triggered by an existential question I saw posed online, and wound up back here. I’m terrified that I’m going insane.
Please comment from or advise me from personal experience if you’re currently seeing a therapist and undergoing ERP to treat existential thought OCD. I don’t understand how ERP could work on thoughts like ‘what if my own family or kids aren’t real’ I know with contamination ocd they expose you to your fears by making touch objects or things and with harm ocd they might get you to hold a knife but low does the same principle apply to Existential thought OCD? I’ve been on the ocdf website and couldn’t get any answers …. Please comment
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