- Date posted
- 5y ago
- Date posted
- 5y ago
My dog is Australian Shepherd about 12 and developed a heart murmur so I can relate to the fear. Have you thought about getting a dog portrait painted to help remember? There’s lots of artists on Etsy that do it. I remember seeing a story on the news about how when a guy’s dog got cancer he quit his job and did a cross country road trip and hiked all over the country with his dog to make sure he lived his last days to the fullest. Maybe you can re-focus on how to make sure your dog just has the best time possible while still around? Cook human food safe for dog, walks if able, car trips etc - whatever your dog likes to do ! Stay strong! Your dog would want you to be safe and happy too.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Beautiful words I appreciate so much. He always just loved time with me being pet. I hope when I get home he's still here and maybe bring him in to shower and brush him out. These emotions are hard but I appreciate the kind words and thoughts. I pray your dog lives a full life as well.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’m so sorry. My guinea pig actually had the same thing happen in 2009 - she lost control of her back legs because her kidneys were failing. Guinea pigs’ immune systems are very fragile and she passed away a few days after that happened. Gosh when there’s multiple losses at once ? that makes everything so much more intense.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Back in 2009 my guinea pig (which I’d only had for about two years at that point) got sick and very shortly after that passed away. I was only nine then and I think it shocked me more than anything else. I learned very early in life how hard it would be for me to cope with the loss of a pet, and I was never comfortable with getting too emotionally attached to an animal ever again. I’ve loved them at a distance and learned about species and such, but I don’t name animals anymore and I haven’t had a pet in my home since 2009 (mainly because of allergies in the house, but it’s also due to my struggling to cope with that loss). It’s one of those things where having a pet and then losing said pet makes me very sad, and I don’t know if I’d get stronger by facing that fear and having a pet every couple of years, OR if I should avoid pets and focus on overcoming other thought patterns that are more prevalent in my life.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
On Tuesday morning my dogs back legs stopped working, he couldn’t move or anything, I thought he would have to be put down, but he has to be on painkillers for the rest of his life, I’ve had several pets die and in 2016 I lost two family members within a month and then another on New Year’s Day 2019
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I am sorry for your losses. That must have been very difficult. You got through it though and that's the key. I dont know how I'd handle a death in the family. I'm the youngest of seven and have around 20 nieces/nephews. I have been blessed but I fear the loss. Trying to shift my mindset to appreciate what I have and even what I had. Like appreciating the years I've had with my pup. JS0406 how are you doing with the losses to this day?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’m getting there, there’s times that I still struggle a lot like Christmas birthdays etc but that’s too be expected, that’s where my fear of the death of my parents/siblings came from, that’s what I’m doing as well being thankful for the time and memories I’ve had with my dog
Related posts
- Date posted
- 11w ago
It’s been 4 years. 4 years since I spiralled into a world controlled by rituals of 4, it started as 2, then 3, then 4 - my safe number. The amount of times I wash my hands after touching something dirty and how many repeats it takes until I feel ‘clean’, the amount of taps I make when closing doors to make sure I don’t ‘die’, the amount of times I rinse cutlery and plates before eating off them, the amount of times I disinfect things. My OCD subtype is contamination and I know 2020 lockdowns and the pandemic caused it to spiral but what started as a small ritual quickly became bigger until I no longer remembered what my life was like without the obsessive thoughts of germs and contamination. Could that person be ill? What if I go outside to the shops and someone makes me sick? You can’t answer the door to get that package from the delivery driver because he might make you sick, oh you can’t put the shopping away without disinfecting it first - what if someone has coughed on it? ‘I’ve got to wear gloves to do that’ I can’t, I can’t, I can’t. For 4 years I’ve lived like this, the ‘I don’t want to touch that’ or ‘I can’t go to this place because I don’t want to get ill and die’ ‘can you go do that for me as I don’t think I can right now’ - I know my OCD is irrational, I know the likelihood of those things actually happening are slim to none and I know my OCD stems from a need of control in my life because for so many years I felt like everything in my life was out of my control. But no matter how much I know of how many books I read, how many mindful practices I do the panic I feel after being ‘exposed’ or before exposing myself to a trigger is horrible. I’ve avoided and avoided and avoided to the point where something small now seems and feels like an impossible mountain to climb. It often feels like there isn’t light at the end of the tunnel on the dark days, when I know there is, it’s just going to take some time. Despite this on the outside to those not in my circle my life is a whole picture perfect painting. I run my own business, have a nice car, a nice house, a happy relationship and the of best friends and I’m so grateful for all those things but the reality is much different - behind closed doors and hidden in the closest is the OCD monster. I’ve decided now, after 4 years it’s time to change. I’m breaking the cycle and starting anew. The irony that 4 is my safe number too and it’s been 4 years since things started to get dark. I’m ready to lose control and find myself again. Why am I writing this? Honestly, I really don’t know. I found this app recently and hope it can be a help for my ERP practices I’ve been practicing on my own and it’s actually the first time I’ve ever openly posted or spoken about my OCD to date. For years I have lived with a huge amount of shame and embarrassment, hiding my issues from everyone - even my closest friends have no idea how much it impacts my day to day. I’ve felt shame as I can’t control my own mind despite knowing the thoughts are irrational and the rituals only provide temporary relief but each day again and again the safety blanket of the rituals wraps me up and takes over. The only person who truly knows how much it affects me is my partner, who has been by my side through it all, he’s burnt out and has seen first hand the impact it has had on me, my life and my happiness. I’ve sheltered him as much as I can, but I’m sure those who are in relationships with OCD can relate to the burnout their partner feels day in day out. So that’s my story, I hope those going through similar can take comfort in this and know they aren’t alone in it all as my OCD has made me feel so incredibly lonely, isolated and empty for 4 years too long. It feels freeing to finally share my monster and I hope I can connect with others who are on a similar journey to me. The biggest thing I want to be able to do again? I want to be able to hug my loved ones without feeling triggered, I want to go outside and enjoy life without worry, I want to live again. This app has made me feel seen for the first time in a long time and reading your stories, your experiences and how you’re coping is comforting, encouraging and makes me feel less alone ❤️ thank you for reading x
- Date posted
- 11w ago
So, I know my capacity to get fixated on things. And it's normally something that's relatively remote but, my latest issue is really getting to me and I was wondering if people have any advice. I'm avoiding getting too into specifics, as I don't want this to get reassurance-y but, in essence.. I came to the realisation recently that people who I'd been "friends" (feels like the wrong term now) when I was younger were not very nice people, and normalized a lot of very unpleasant behaviour towards other members of the group. They really normalized it, sold themselves as figures of authority, as older and more responsible and grown-up than others, and looking back, they acted horribly. And coming to this realisation, that I'd been manipulated into just accepting their behaviour has just... broken me. My OCD has latched onto it and I can't stop feeling irreversibly tainted by it. I've talked to others about it, and they've reassured me, told me it's not a big deal and that I hold myself to too high a standard, but none of that sticks. I feel better for a bit, then think 'Maybe when you told them you were skewing it to make yourself look better' or 'Did you leave out a crucial detail'. I keep ruminating over and over, trying to remember exactly how everything played out, trying to figure out if I fed into the behaviour, if I did something bad myself (because y'know, I feel like I was accepting of it at the time, so what does it say about my own values?). I know I need to stop doing all this if I want to improve, but then some part of me keeps saying 'So, you're just going to let yourself off the hook then?' Normally, I can rationalize my own fears to some degree, assure myself something won't happen, but the realness of the situation, and the fact I only came to understand the reality of it because the thought had been bothering me means it feels so much more all-encompassing. I know confessing in itself is a compulsion, but I keep feeling that if I'm not I'm somehow concealing what I 'really am' from others around me, and any positive interactions are me deceiving them in some way. I feel like I can't enjoy anything in life right now, and a good part of me feels I should not enjoy it ever again. If anybody has any advice on it, I'm all ears. Or even hearing if you relate to these feelings, I might appreciate the solidarity at least.
- Date posted
- 11w ago
I don’t know why but today I feel so incredibly angry right now and I was so frustrated with everything including my two dogs. I didn’t hurt them or hit them or anything but I was particularly annoyed and angry when they were trying to get presumably a bunny or a raccoon from underneath the shed, so I had to pull my small dog away when he wouldn’t budge away from the shed and i couldn’t pick him up because I was not close enough. I feel bad because I know I love my dogs but oh my god I just get so annoyed with them and on top of them everything else I have to just shut down all day and the things I don’t understand. I feel like I’m going insane. I don’t want my dogs to think I don’t love them because i was angry and annoyed at them. I know they’re just animals and they love me and I love them. I want them to know I’m sorry for even getting mad. I wish I didn’t feel so angry and yet so disconnected at the same time. I’m terrified I’m an evil person or that I don’t love my pets or something. I started to hit myself and punch myself because I do that when I get over the edge angry. I don’t know why I feel angry. It’s a mix of anger and emptiness and I don’t want either of them especially towards my dogs.
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