- Date posted
- 5y
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- 5y
Yes, it's common :(. But we know what we like and want deep inside and we'll eventually figure it out :)
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- 5y
There’s a boy ive been seeing since the summer and I’ve liked him a lot since then. And normally when I’m with him it can make my HOCD a little less just because I knew I liked Him. But every so often I get anxiety around him. Like we had a great weekend together this past weekend and I was so happy about it, then yesterday I was with him and i started getting anxiety wondering like do I really like him? And then it started feeling like I didn’t meanwhile I’ve been head over heels for this boy for a while now
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- 5y
Hi Becca, I can totally relate to you! I feel the same. When I talk to my boyfriend, it’s usually a little less. When I am not with him or by myself, anxiety spikes. Idk if you experience this but sometimes when I care a little too much about my friends or give other people attention, I start worrying if I am falling out of love with him. I feel like since I like him, I should be thinking of him 24/7 and he should be that one person I prioritize. Due to that, I think I am getting tired of him a lil sometimes lately...
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- 5y
I can really like relate to you, I really like this guy at my school and I've had a crush on him for almost 2 years and HOCD spiked only a year ago. I sonetimes doubt if I'm forcing it, but I'm somehow head over heels for him. Him and I don't speak a lot and only know each other through mutual friends but the gestures he makes at me just kinda like him. I also like liked him completely out of the blue so I always feel like I'm having compulsory heterosexuality :(
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- 5y
I feel this. I’m also terrified because I’ve hooked up with other guys and while I desired to have contact with them and make out, i wasn’t always into it and it wasn’t always great. Especially if it was a guy I wasn’t into. Now my brain is certain I’m gay. But we are stronger than this
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- 5y
Yes queen we are but I really hope to get my attraction back it was so natural and now has become so foreign :(
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- 5y
Yesss. Currently going through it :/
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- 5y
So me and him have been talking since the summer and have been hooking up ever since. I feel like me being the girl my crush on him was a little stronger than his crush on me. Like I always couldn’t wait for him to text me and stuff and I’ve been wanting to be serious with him but we decided to take things slow cause he didn’t want us to rush and I agreed. And now he’s showing more interest in me and treating me more like his girlfriend and I’m like not use to it but I liked it this whole weekend ofc. So then last night we were hanging out and there was one thing that turned me off about him and then I started having anxiety like wait do I not like him anymore now that he’s showing more interest in me or something, but the days before when he was I was loving it. And then I start thinking well what if this is a sign in actually a lesbian. Like I like a boy but then when he actually starts showing interest in my I start to not like him or something and it’s because I’m sub consciously a lesbian. Meanwhile I’ve had boyfriends in the past before I had HOCD and I was In love with them and none of this was ever a problem
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- 5y
But the funny thing is that I have friends that have told me that once a guy starts showing interest in them more they start not liking them as much. But I don’t honestly think that’s my case because he’s showed a lot of interest in me before and I’ve loved it
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- 5y
Ugh idk what to think
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- 5y
Sorry for the novel I’m just scared that I’m losing my strong feelings for him. Like I’ve literally liked this boy so much and have even told my friends how I feel like he might be the one I marry bc we have so much in common and get along so well
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- 5y
I feel you but at this point, I think best thing to do is not fight with your thoughts and tell yourself, “if it happens, it does. If not, there is someone better.” For me because I keep doubting my love for him & fight with thoughts, I feel like I push him away or start feeling numb. I think best is not to engage in thoughts.
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- 5y
I have this intuition that my crush and I our gonna meet someday again and like have something more. I can really relate to you. I've always liked guys but hocd makes me doubt if those feelings were really true :(
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- 5y
@chamomil& We are in this together. It sucks and it’s hard but glad to know we are not alone.
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- 5y
@Jennnn Yep, my crush and I had studied language together and it was all great but I feel like I only imagines it :(. I feel like my real memories or events were false
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- 5y
This just doesn’t make sense to me Sunday (I was so happy being with him and cuddling) and the yesterday (Monday) I was having anxiety if I actually like him or do I suddenly feel my feelings are going away. Maybe it’s just the fact that we are starting to get more serious that’s just scaring me
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- 5y
But we’ve gotten serious in the past and I was happy about it
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- 5y
Oof I can feel you :(. We are all going to get through this, I promise!!!
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- 5y
The sad part is I have felt like I could love this boy and I would hate to see these feelings for him vanish bc I know that I have liked him so much. I’m full of so much anxiety right now
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- 5y
Same as you, our OCD is literally such a bitch when it comes to our sexual and romantic feelings. Things so abstract and vulnerable to doubts. But I hope we all can get through and be with our favourite guys :)
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- 5y
I just hate this I went from absolutely loving the thought of being with this boy and getting all happy and giddy about it to now being scared and having anxiety
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- 5y
Same :(. I've always had attraction specifically only to guys since I was a kid, now I feel like I'm turning bi/gay and Im gonna fall in love with a girl instead of my crush (I honestly can't bear to think of a girl)
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 22w
no clue if this is compulsive, but I’m interested to hear any obsessions others have that aren’t the “common” ones you see online about what ROCD is? a few for me: - thoughts about their partner being with someone else instead (sometimes a specific person) and then trying to analyze your reaction to it? e.g. does it *feel* more right than us, do I actually feel happy for them, etc. - trying to imagine your partner in your current situation or maybe a specific future situation (when they’re not around) and trying to decide if they “fit” in it? - being super scared of losing them, then suddenly feeling like you don’t care much for them at all, and just constantly cycling? - I almost never fully enjoyed sex because I was constantly obsessing about whether or not I was turned on, turned on “enough,” if I was just having groinal responses and wasn’t actually turned on, looking at his face just to decide if I find him attractive enough, comparing my experience with how I feel watching content alone, etc.
- Date posted
- 17w
Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please
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- 16w
Anyone else with HOCD get thoughts of like "people in denial try to distract themselves" or anything along those lines when just trying to move on from the thoughts. Having a pretty bad episode this morning at least anxiety wise.
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