shonti
- Date posted
- 5y
FathomableFathomable
- Date posted
- 5y
Sounds like you imagine that stuff as a compulsion designed to reassure you about your feelings and relationship. And it looks like you then do another common compulsion which is to analyse how you feel about it in order to look for evidence relating to your obsessive worry. My recommendation is to stop imagining scenarios and to stop using thoughts and fantasies as a way of "testing" and investigating how you feel. When you get the urge to do those compulsions, do something else instead or tell your brain "I promise to do that later". Let yourself get anxious without doing these compulsions.
shontishonti
- Date posted
- 5y
But I wasn’t reassured. I became more anxious
FathomableFathomable
- Date posted
- 5y
@shawniecakes Yep, compulsions don't always give us the result we want. It's best not to do them. Currently your compulsion is to analyse whether the anxiety you felt during the first compulsion means something about your relationship. Try to stop doing this compulsion. You don't need to know the answer.
shontishonti
- Date posted
- 5y
@Louw Why do the thoights feel true
FathomableFathomable
- Date posted
- 5y
@shawniecakes Asking that question is a reassurance-seeking compulsion, which is you trying to get comfort that it's not real. You don't need to know. Trying to reassure yourself that it's OCD anxiety and therefore definitely not true and your relationship is definitely perfectly happy and wonderful etc, is not the way to get rid of OCD. You have to approach every single worry with an attitude of "maybe it's this way, maybe it's the other way, I don't know and I don't need to know and I can't find out by obsessing and compulsing". Sometimes worries are true or have part of a basis in reality. It's not always black and white. Having ROCD is certainly no guarantee that your relationship is perfect. It just means that you have OCD about it. You don't need to know whether your specific worries are legitimate or just OCD. Trying to find out is a compulsion. If you treat your OCD by not doing compulsions and just letting yourself feel anxious instead of always trying to get rid of it and feel better, the OCD will go away. Then you will have your answers.
shontishonti
- Date posted
- 5y
@Louw Whenever I make myself anxious and dont perform compulsions, I always get scared because my mind tells me that if I don’t comfort myself, I will continue to be anxious and forget about my feelings for my man which is I’m scared to happen.
FathomableFathomable
- Date posted
- 5y
@shawniecakes Yep, you get scared. Continue to not do compulsions anyway.
Jayy0101Jayy0101
- Date posted
- 5y
Yeah I get that sometimes. It sucks.
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