Anyone else who also has jealousy rocd?

loola

Date posted: 5y

Me too, what is yours about exactly?

Ocd_istheworst

Date posted: 5y

welllll my most recent spike is that my bf watches a certain youtuber that he always says he loves and on all his vlogs, there’s always the same trashy girls being slutty in clips and it’s been eating me alive if he finds them attractive (they are) and or if he gets turned on by how slutty they are And I can’t get past why he wAtches stupid shit like that when it doesn’t even seem to be his personality in the least bit and I keep thinking how opposite I am of both the stupid vlogs and the girls in it?

loola

Date posted: 5y

Oh I can super relate. My boyfriend watches lots of ASMR if you know what that is? And he always watches the same girls doing it, and they’re very slutty types. Sometimes it doesn’t bother me but when I’m in a bad headspace it really pisses me off

loola

Date posted: 5y

I think that fact they are open about it is good though. My boyfriend never hides his videos and I know what he watches so he isn’t weird about it but I know it’s just an insecurity thing with me

Ocd_istheworst

Date posted: 5y

I’m so glad I’m not alone even though it’s tortuous to feel this way. I always feel like not many people have this subtype on here. And you’re right it is good they aren’t hiding things from us at least! my bf doesn’t see wtf I’m so upset about they are just funny vlogs and he used to rave about this channel for years and just this quarantine I decided “hm he really enjoys them. let’s see if I would like them too.” Which was the worst decision of my life.. lmao ? and apparently he’s one of the most famous youtubers out there and I just don’t get it. Sorry I’m rambling ? I’m trying to do ERP for it bc it got me to relapse so bad I needed to see an NOCD Therpist on here.

loola

Date posted: 5y

Could you maybe tell me who the YouTuber is? I watch a lot so might be someone I’ve heard of! Yeah it is good to find someone with the same issue, I find all my anxieties are centred around social media

Ocd_istheworst

Date posted: 5y

David Bobrick. He even has the same name as my boyfriend so it’s like even when I say his name it triggers me now? It’s so ridiculous. I feel like social media in general is so triggering and toxic and my anxieties tend to latch onto a lot too...

loola

Date posted: 5y

ah yes, I thought it could be. I am the absolute same, social media is so bad for the psyche, I think we both need to work on our insecurities and then this stuff won’t matter, our boyfriends aren’t doing anything inately bad but we are feeling it because of how insecure we feel right?

Ocd_istheworst

Date posted: 5y

Ugh yes for sure!!!.... that’s the hardest thing for me. I have had such a bad self esteem since I was like 7 and was always bullied for my looks? so I feel this excessively intertwines.. do u also compare yourself a lot?

loola

Date posted: 5y

@Ocdaim Oh yes all the time, it’s the worst feeling, it makes me feel even worse. Ultimately I’m happy with who I am but as soon as I’m comparing myself to someone else I forget that

Ocd_istheworst

Date posted: 5y

@loola Omg yes. I totally get that and Me too! Like all in all Im really happy with who I am as a person at this point in my life. but.. I then compare myself to people who I don’t even like, or people I don’t even WANT to be like, just because maybe someone else is comparing me to them bc in this world said-person are still concidered “better” or “more attractive” in society because of reasons or features I don’t hAve, but I still don’t want to be them? But it still bothers me? Like it’s like I hVe to protect myself in some way from getting hurt but it doesn’t protect me at all .. it doesn’t really make sense you know?

loola

Date posted: 5y

I completely agree and I’m the same. I hate how I get jealous of girls who post model like pics on their instagrams constantly when that sorta thing is something I’ve always hated and never wanted to do anyway because i don’t like that vain aspect of it, and the self obsession of social media. But then when I see these girls on my boyfriends feed I feel like I need to also post all these photos and I hate that my morals just change in the second I feel belittled

Ocd_istheworst

Date posted: 5y

Omg yeah it’s like this “false threat” alert goes off in us like

Ocd_istheworst

Date posted: 5y

Sry got cut off **like oh I have to be this way or that way or this is what society likes so this is prob what my bf likes too and then suddenly your down a rabbit hole of comparisons or feeling like we “should” be or do a certain thing >.<

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