Ella___
- Date posted
- 4y ago
figuringitalloutfiguringital...
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I am, struggling a lot tonight ❤️
Ella___Ella___
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I know exactly how you feel I had been having an entire month where my pocd wasnt bugging me but it decided to come back twice as hard during the weekend and usually I’m able to bounce out of it but recently it’s been hard
Fin1234!Fin1234!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I was just properly diagnosed with POCD and I’m very scared and feeling very alone. I tried to talk to my parent’s about it tonight but couldn’t tell them the theme. They didn’t really understand the torture it is causing me. I’m really struggling with believing I can ever have a normal relationship this has been so hard and effected every aspect of my life.
Ella___Ella___
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Honestly just know you’re not alone and sadly parents won’t understand mine never understood and although it did hurt knowing they didn’t understand I don’t blame them because sadly people without ocd never understand. Just know you’re not alone and if you’d like yo talk about what your pocd bugs you with I’m always here
Fin1234!Fin1234!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
For sure im seeing that now. how long have you suffered from this? I have a hard time because this is my only theme and I’m still struggling to believe it’s actually OCD because I know a lot of people have many themes and it starts when their children where mine started in my early 20s.
Ella___Ella___
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Ocd starts either when youre young or in your 20s and I’ve had ocd since I was 7 but it went away and came back extremely hard in my 20s
Ella___Ella___
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Whats your ocd theme if you dont mind me asking
Fin1234!Fin1234!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I just started with an OCC specialist afew weeks ago
Fin1234!Fin1234!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
OCD*
Fin1234!Fin1234!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
POCD and I don’t remember it when I was a child but I do remember obsessing over death and doing afew things that I would say now we’re compulsions. I was diagnosed with depression and aniexty at 16 aswell.
Ella___Ella___
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Ive had POCD for about a year and I know it’s scary have you gotten any intrusive thoughts those are the worst
Fin1234!Fin1234!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
It’s just very scary
Fin1234!Fin1234!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Yes now that im working with an OCD specialist and stuck at home it’s all day long it’s just sits with you telling you to figure out what’s going on and do mental checks or tells me I’m a bad person for my thoughts and I need to be locked away.
Ella___Ella___
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Yeah just make sure you dont over analyze these intrusives theyll turn into false memories its the worst literally makes you believe you’ve done something bad when you haven’t
Strawberree Strawberree
- Date posted
- 4y ago
*trigger warning*I have a question..And I'm sorry if this sounds like reassurance seeking but its bothering me too much..I had an awful intrusive thought not too long ago.. it was like an uncomfortable scenario in my head that was triggered all of the sudden. And then a voice in my head said "would you even be able to resist?" (Acting out my fear it means) I felt horrible. It felt like I was letting my guard down and my "true feelings" were coming out.. thinking about it now makes me feel sick. Can ocd really do this to me?? Make me feel like I want to act out these fears even though I really want to think that I dont? That feeling lasted for a split second then I fell into panic.
Ella___Ella___
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Honestly ocd will make you feel that way because remember ocd feeds on fear ive had moments like those but it’s important to understand its an intrusive not real the fact that you feel disgusted by it goes to show its not real
Strawberree Strawberree
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@Ella_O Sometimes I fear that I'm not disgusted enough, or that the disgust is just a front to hide my desires.. but that is also ocd isnt it? It seems like it never ends..
Strawberree Strawberree
- Date posted
- 4y ago
But I cant tell you how many years I spend combating this, looking for proof that I'm not a bad person. Looking back into my childhood remembering that I was always interested in men. how much time I spent in bed praying to god and crying repeating "I wanna be good" over and over.. well I can tell you. I'd say 7 or 8 years I've spent on and off struggling. I'm tired of this and wanna live my life..
figuringitalloutfiguringital...
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Are you referring to POCD? If so, I have a very similar story. I also was into men at that age and struggled. Now I have pocd and it’s brutal.
Strawberree Strawberree
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@figuringitallout Yes.. it really is brutal isnt it..sometimes I wake up and say "really?! Of all things in the world you're worried about THAT?! That's dumb!" and some days I wake up and am constantly worried about it. And there were also times when I went months without intrusive thoughts. I was definately a more content person during those times. Even up till recently I was ok. Then boom, here it is again. I hate it so much
figuringitalloutfiguringital...
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Yesss! I was doing great but then I relapsed in this coronavirus sfuff. do you ever feel like being gay makes you pocd worse?
Strawberree Strawberree
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I'm a straight female, so i guess no matter what it's always hard
Ella___Ella___
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@em1997 I personally have a false memory that bugs me to my core to the point where sometimes I just don’t wana live anymore
Related posts
malolin_21
- Date posted
- 16w ago
Hey:) I just want to vent
I’m feeling kind of sad cause today was not a really good day in terms of my ocd. I was feeling kind of foggy/numb and that send me to spiraling. I’m 21 years old currently studying but my family has been having trouble with money for the last couple years(we’re just me and my mom) and I kinda want to get a job but everything is far from my home and I wouldn’t be able to return back at night, also it’s either way more expensive to move or the schedule wouldn’t let me take my classes. The point is that because of that every time my mom is stress tends to treat me bad, she speaks to me like I’m stupid or she just screams to nothing cursing all life and everything and that actually makes me feel soo bad and guilty for not doing anything, I know it’s hard for me to get a job that actually helps us without quitting school but that doesn’t stop me from feeling like I’m a burden. I want to help, I want to maybe hug her or something but I know she will be angrier and probably will reject it. So that’s it, I just feel like she punishes me for the stress she’s carrying and I get it but one day is happy and it feels like all love and the next is treating me like that, Idk it’s hard (also I feel like I shouldn’t be saying this cause it’s all my fault) 🫤
Christy Str...
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 7w ago
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OCD can be an incredibly lonely experience, especially when people around you don’t understand the thoughts and fears you’re facing. But you’re not alone—others have been there too. What’s something about OCD that makes you feel isolated or alone?
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justtrynamakeit
- Date posted
- 6w ago
POCD - Week of Hell
So I was doing good for about 5 months. I was going to therapy, practicing the skills, and for about the past month, I fell into a depression funk. The last week, however, has been a week of really loud OCD. I am in a constant state of anxiety and find myself doing compulsions. I'm wondering if anyone has experienced what I'm about to describe. I'm considering taking myself to the hospital, but my little boy's birthday party is this weekend and I don't want to miss it: I keep having this bad feeling like I actually want to do the bad things in my mind. I know OCD intrusive thoughts can tell you "I want to" but this just seems different - maybe it's OCD trying to come at me a new way. It's not like thoughts telling me "I want" it's like even when I tell myself I don't want to do the bad stuff, there's this nagging feeling telling me I really want to. I'm scared.
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