- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
My boyfriend is extremely sensitive and insecure which is why I did not tell him about my (r)OCD when we first started dating. Now I am quite thankful I kept it as a secret for over two years because otherwise I would have probably used him to get some reassurance. Because he is so fragile mentally, I did not want to ask him questions about our relationship etc. Eventually, I had to tell him because my OCD (different theme) got out of hand at some point and it had started to really have an effect on our relationship in that sense that I had to give a proper reason for my strange behaviour. I also felt quite guilty and untrustworthy but on the other hand I think that it was my own private problem. OCD is so difficult to explain to someone who has not experienced it. My boyfriend knew that I was both depressed and anxious though and of course tried to support me. At the time I thought it was enough.
- Date posted
- 5y
Yeah that’s why I’m also afraid to tell my boyfriend... he’s not so much insecure but he does analyze things as well and if I were to tell him I know he would get hurt, and that’s the last thing I want. I told him I have anxiety and that I feel depressed from time to time, so when saying I have anxiety I kind of included my ocd along with that, I’m not sure if I should tell him anything more yet.. I’m gonna speak with a psychologist that’s gonna give me a mental health evaluation soon and I he knows that, he’s very supportive as well, so I just think until then I shouldn’t tell him.. I’m not sure?
- Date posted
- 5y
@Kea Remember, there is no urgency (in my opinion) to "confess" your partner that you have OCD. If you feel a sense of urgency, it can be something that is caused by feeling anxious. I am sure you can figure this out! ?
- Date posted
- 5y
@emkala Yeah, I’ve realized when I do feel more anxious and my rocd kicks in I feel like a horrible girlfriend for not confessing to him what goes on in my head? I’ll tell him when I’m ready & get evaluated, thank you so much!☺️
- Date posted
- 5y
i haven’t told him the content of my thoughts but i have told him that i deal wit ocd and he’s very understanding about it. u should bring it up to him if ur comfortable with it, but ur not obligated to tell him anything! and if u do end up telling him the content of ur thoughts make sure u let him know that’s it’s ocd and not ur true desires. that’s very important, because he’s gonna end up taking it personally which is not his fault bc ocd is hard to understand
- Date posted
- 5y
I wanted to add that just like @ocdsvcks, I have not told my boyfriend the content of my thoughts. I have given him some general examples what can happen when someone is experiencing OCD but after that I got a feeling that he might end up taking some of my thoughts really personally. Mainly because he loves to analyze.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
I’m a good man and I know that. My OCD revolves around relationships. While dating someone a truly enjoy, I find myself needing to compulse everything on my mind or else I feel like I’m being a liar or keeping secrets. I also am pretty confident I suffer from false memory ocd. I don’t like to put a label on things but I’m 99.9% sure I do. My compulsions a lot of times come from things I’m not even sure are real. The more thought I put into them, the more I start to believe they are real. One of the worst compulsions I had in my relationship was I had a thought “what if I find my ex more attractive” and “what if I thought the sex with them was better”. I ended up compulsing these things to my gf. After lots of time to think and get a ahold of myself I was able to remind myself that these things weren’t true and I was just in a downward spiral. There was a 2-3 month period where every time I was relieved of something then I would instantly think of something else. These compulsions have caused insecurity in my gf and I feel like a terrible person. Never meant to hurt her at all and was just trying to find a sense of relief. While I know it is not true, I can’t fix things with words and I feel terrible. I would love to hear from people with tricks and strategies that can help. I love my gf and want to fix things and understand this is not a relationship fixer app but I would like to know what are some ways you are able to deal with these kind of things.
- Date posted
- 19w
For those of you in relationships with ROCD, do your partners know of your diagnosis. I am new to treatment and new to this avenue of mental health. I am generally pretty open and honest with my partner about things but the dark side of my mind I keep hidden. I’m scared to tell him about this if I’m diagnosed. And I’m scared that if I’m diagnosed and something real does go south in the relationship then my diagnosis will be used against me.
- Date posted
- 8w
I can’t help but feel so anxious because of guilt. I feel guilty about not sharing everything about my OCD to my partner, but because I understand that confession itself is a compulsion and would not help anyone. I feel so anxious too that if all my fears come true and she finds out, then it would be so devastating for everyone especially her. Does anyone feel the same thing? How could I change my perspective on this?
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