- Date posted
- 4y ago
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I know you don’t want reassurance but maybe all this means is right now you’re supposed to focus on you. Not some random guy who’s probably not even worthy of you. Just don’t try to convince yourself you like someone when actually all you want is to feel something. I don’t know how serious you were about wanting to die and I’m sure you know that that would be terrible but honestly don’t even put you’re energy into those thoughts. Everything is temporary. Nothing really lasts forever.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Thanks for hearing me out ! :) yes I been trying to see the positive of this whole thing, and maybe it’s suppose to happen like this for self improvement. After all, I’ve always been so self conscious since I was a child maybe it’s time to change that now and stop putting myself down. Thanks again <333
- Date posted
- 4y ago
life sucks and it's hard, but i've really started to savour and hold on to really small things that make me happy. like the colour of the sky, or when im running late but the bus is as well so i still make it, or the taste of coffee, and shit like that. it used to be hard to look at the small stuff but i think that over time it just gets easier.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Yes! your right, I usually am a positive person who appreciates the little things. Like getting up early in the morning w a cup of coffee to start the day but it’s just lately the ocd thoughts have gotten stronger but I’m hoping my mental state goes back to normal because life really is great when there’s no ocd :)
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@Anon yeah the dips are the hardest. stay strong, i know you can get through this!!❤️❤️
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Idk man, I often want to be dead but it would be awful for my family so I don't do anything about it. I mean, I can probably struggle a lot, to end up with a moderately happy life. Acceptance of whatever happens, even if it's bad, would have to be key, which takes bravery, and the bravery is exhausting when you've not been raised to be resilient. I agree with the other poster- these lows happen, but they do pass. Fill your life with things you enjoy and minimise your time spent worrying. Seize the day and all that. I go back on forth a lot on whether I want or could cope with having a partner or children, so I prefer to not think about it and try to trust that I'll have clarity about that at some point in the future.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w ago
I haven't been officially diagnosed with OCD but when I learned more about it, I never related to anything more. A little back story: when I was younger, there were a couple of youth suicides in my area and the schools felt the need to have someone come in and talk about suicide. Well the person they had come in did a horrible job teaching it and basically made it seem like the smallest negative emotion or feeling or change in behavior made you suicidal. This ended up scaring me so much that I got horrid anxiety. Fast forward to now, Everytime I feel anxiety and panic, I fear I'm going to kill myself. Everytime I feel down and depressed, I fear I'll end it all. I'm scared to be around anything sharp because the "What if" I hurt myself comes into my mind. There are always intrusive thoughts at almost every point of the day. And it's not only for me. Everytime I hear someone being negative, I fear they will be suicidal. I know in my heart that none of this is true but it's terrifying me that it's stuck around so much that it makes me scared that maybe it is true. I've had a lot of death in my family in the past year and a half and a lot of other family drama that I'd never had before that is now also bringing up existential intrusive thoughts. And I'd never questioned anything about life before but now I get the "why is life like this?" and "does anything we do matter?" and I hate it. I don't want to think like that. I just want to go through life being able to handle things normally again. It terrifies me even right now going "what if you give up?"
- Date posted
- 19w ago
I feel like there’s no way out of this. everyday i’m anxious and depressed from these thoughts. i feel like i have to constantly question if it’s OCD or not. the panic attacks are insane and i freak out. and a compulsion i have is looking eveything up on the internet when im stressing to know that it’s just my OCD and im not in danger. but looking things up add on to my thoughts and i start thinking “what if” actual suidcal people think. do others with this theme whenever they do something like if im taking a picture it’ll be like “yeah you look happy people will wonder what happened when your gone” LIKE i DO NOT want to end my life. or even as simple as cleaning my room, “yup keep it clean so when your family goes through your stuff” then i panic and can’t even do anything. those thoughts distress me so bad. i’ll sit there and think how good my life is or when im having a good day my thoughts will be like “NOPEEE what if your just saying that to convince yourself” it never shuts up and genuinely makes me think i have SI or something. i hope this reaches the right people just to know im not alone. Even when i do get better in the back of my mind it’s always “people who want to are the same a day before too” im genuinely scared and im scared one day im going to just snap and do it because its “too much” do i need to go to a mental hospital! i feel insane.
- Date posted
- 18w ago
Like I'm not even scared I feel numb and ever since that night I've completely went down hill Idk what to do the feeling i felt this time genuily felt like i liked it and i didnt even have anxiety at that moment and now I'm panicking I really hope this is still OCD like I'm sorry if I'm still asking for reassurance but im really worried like it felt good in that moment I don't understand what's going on like I hope it was a false feeling and not something real.....like this has happened before but Idk 😭😭😭😭 I really don't know what to I don't want to turn into a p word I don't this I've been sleeping all day I still do compulsions a little to get rid of the thoughts but I've been getting sexual thoughts too and I don't want them but I feel like I do I don't understand I though I was getting better but I guess every time I get better everything gets worse..
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