here’s my story. (i’ve sent this to someone just thought i’d copy and paste it) I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for about four months and the first two months were like a honeymoon phase. It was great I didn’t have any intrusive thoughts or anything. About two months down the road, I had this intrusive thought about liking this girl and it really stressed me out. It was this girl that I wasn’t even friends with anymore and it really stressed me out like a lot. That lasted for about two weeks. Another intrusive thought came after that and it was saying that I was gay and that I should break up with my boyfriend. That’s been going on for about two months now. It’s been really stressful because at times my mind will just be like “come out to him” and it just feels so real. And will be doing intimate things in my mind will just be like “you don’t like this” “this is not what you need to do you don’t like d word“ LOL. When my boyfriend and I first started dating we had sex a lot and I never thought about that those thoughts did not even cross my mind at all. All this time I feel like I’m in denial or something. Last year, I did kind of think I had feelings for this one girl. But at the time, I was homeschooled and had been for about five years and I was in a ballet company with all girls and I have never had a crush on a girl once in my entire life. I’ve always been very boy crazy. Last year was just me being desperate for love the relationship wasn’t even sexual in anyway. I came out as bi after that because I had read shit on my astrology chart or something, and I think I was reading that months before last year in the whole girl situation happened. And something on my charts that I had bisexual tendencies or something and I was like “oh that has to be me since it says that.” I just remember being extremely confused and I actually ended up in a mental hospital shortly after I came out as bi and it doesn’t really feel natural to me in any way. Like I feel like if I was truly happy I wouldn’t of been at the worst mental state i’ve ever been in in my life. Shortly after that, I went to high school. Remember I was homeschooled before then, so I started up my junior year at a new high school I haven’t been to school in five years. I went boy crazy and dated two different guys before the boyfriend that I have now. I never did fall for a girl or anything. I was just very very confused about my sexuality from after last year happened to about January of this year. I was always confused and questioning. I was also addicted to lesbian porn for about a year. So I think that has a lot to do with what I’m going through now. So anyways, in January I kissed this girl in my English class just for fun or whatever and I did touch her but it was kind of like a thing where she said “you won’t do that” and so I did it just because she said I wouldn’t do it. I guess I don’t really get grossed out about the thoughts it’s just a lot of anxiety that comes with the thoughts that I’m experiencing now. I haven’t even thought about last year and stuff like that until I started having this thought to come out to my boyfriend and come out to my family and it’s very annoying I’ve been having suicidal thoughts I started new medication I just..... it’s just so hard. Have you experienced any of this in your relationship if you are in one? I really love my boyfriend with everything that I have. With every bone in my body. I don’t doubt that. Because in times that the thoughts don’t bother me, I feel the love between us and even when they are I still do feel the attraction. But those moments where nothing bothers me or even when I’m still thinking about it but things the anxiety isn’t there, I know I love him.