I’m having such weird random thoughts it makes me feel so alone sometimes :( can anyone else relate? I know I’ve been posting a lot but it scares me really bad.

Thank you !!! Peter May i ask how you handle a time of distress like this?? I feel so sad and lonely and also most of my compulsions are in my head and they play over and over Sometimes I call my mom and stuff but then I start crying because it feels like something is really wrong with me. Or I talk to doctors or go to the emergency room but then I freak out even more

@JBird88 I’ve had similar experiences. I used to call my mom while I was at school and just start balling my eyes out because I was being tortured by my intrusive thoughts and mental compulsions. There are a few things I’ve learned throughout the years. When you’re in an extreme episode of ocd, it’s good to do some deep breathing. If you’re embarrassed to do it in front of others like I was, it’s perfectly ok to go into a private room or bathroom. There are some cool deep breathing techniques out there, I can describe them more in depth if you’d like. After you do the deep breathing and feel slightly more calm, I recommend using ERP, CBT, and mindfulness methods. Do you currently have a therapist? Also may I ask why you went to the emergency room? Was it a health related fear?

@Peter522 So I think my OCD has been getting worse. I feel so weird and hyperfocused all the time. I have good moments but then I freak out on and off and this has been happening for a long time. I’m on medication and I scheduled an appointment with my psychiatrist too. So we will talk tomorrow. But I’m back in the Emergency room again and I feel like I’m just plain going crazy and it distresses me because I panic then feel very alone and like something bad is going to happen. I also scheduled to do intensive group therapy radical acceptance for OCD but like right now I feel like I’m on crack going 100mph I was taking a stimulant so I think maybe that has a lot to do with it. But my OCD is making me feel numb and extremely depressed I had episodes where I would start panicking and I had a massive panic attack yesterday because I had an intrusive thought about never getting better and just killing my self or feeling so depressed that I might hurt myself and I got sooooo scared :(

@JBird88 I don’t want to die I think I have a fear of death and also I don’t want to get depressed and commit suicide

@JBird88 I’ve been in a similar situation. You feel like numb to the world, you dissociate a bit maybe, you get extremely depressed, I’ve been through it. My biggest word of advice to you, please remember that this will not last forever. Do your best with whatever coping mechanisms or therapy methods you have learned, and really try hard with them, but don’t beat yourself up if you have trouble bringing yourself to do them or if they don’t “work”. You’re going through a rough time rn, and being compassionate and understanding with yourself, even about your therapy methods, is very important. And remember, I say this as someone who’s had a similar experience, it gets better. It just might take some time. If you’d like I could share some resources that I use quite often that are fairly simple?

@Peter522 Thank you for your kind words. May I ask was it anything that made you feel this worse?? Or it just came on? I presume it’s just OCD episodes Oh please I would love some recourses.

@JBird88 Well, I was going through a period where my OCD was very severe, so it was sort of a longer term thing rather than one single event that triggered it. Looking back on it, I think it may have been my teenaged hormones that triggered it enough to make it severe, although I’ve had OCD since I was a child. That’s just a guess tho and that’s just my own personal experience. After years of trying different medications and working through therapy, my OCD is now manageable. I’m still working on it and struggling with it but it’s much better than it was.It is possible:) For resources, here’s some things that help me. Woebot: A virtual AI chatbot that works with people to teach them CBT, DBT, and mindfulness methods to help see thoughts and feelings for what they are and to challenge them. It also helps you to build a new line of thinking. Doesn’t have ERP, however it is a great resource. I know it’s available on the iOS App Store, but it may be available on other platforms as well. It might sound strange but I would definitely recommend it! More in the next comment...

@JBird88 More resources: Deep breathing: this works well for when you’re going through a bad episode of OCD or are extremely anxious. At least it works well for me. You can trace the side of your hand with your finger. As you go up your thumb, breath in deeply, and as you continue slowly down your thumb, release your whole breath. Continue until you get to the other side of your hand, then go back the other direction. There’s also a breathing bubble on the calm app (it’s provided for free). It serves as a visual and you breathe in as the bubble expands and breathe out as it contracts. It’s very soothing. Meditation: Headspace has some free guided meditations on their app right now. They also have YouTube meditations. Calm also has some. And of course, the paid version of those apps are really good if you end up liking them and can afford it. I will say though, guided meditations probably won’t fix obsessions and compulsions, but they are good for relaxing your mind. The OCD stories podcast: This is a really good podcast for getting some good information about therapy methods, education on OCD, the community’s thoughts, etc. He links to a lot of good self help books that people he interviews wrote as well. The mindfulness workbook for OCD, by Jon Hershfield: This was my first OCD self help book I got and it’s a great introduction to the basics of OCD treatment. It also gives really good ERP and mundfulness suggestions for different OCD subtypes (like health ocd, sexual orientation ocd, etc.) And of course, your biggest resource will be your therapist, if you can get one. Therapy is very useful, and make sure they are trained in treating OCD specifically. I don’t know the specifics of why you’re in the ER, or the specifics of your situation, but make sure you stay safe. You are of so much value. ocd is difficult but it can actually end up teaching you so much in my experience. That’s not a full list, there are many other resources, but that’s a good place to start:)

Peter thank you for shining a glimmer of hope I hope to come out of this better than before ?

@JBird88 I hope you do too! Stay strong?

Have you tried reaching out to a therapist on the NOCD app? That may be a good place to start:)

What I mean by that is they may be able to help give some perspective on the situation, and whether that’s just a compulsion or if you’re really in danger. Also be sure to talk to your doctor too

@Peter522 She’s on vacation :( so that didn’t help lol

@JBird88 Oh okay:( well continue to reach out so that once she’s off of vacation she can help you. There’s also a support chat in the NOCD app that may be able to help. Have you tried that?

@Peter522 Yes I saw that!!! I’m actually thinking about going back to the behavioral hospital though but I don’t know what the best option will be now .... I’m only thinking about that because I want to feel safe with myself. :( it sucks sooooooo bad that I have suicidal ocd because I have NO IDEA of when I would be actually suicidal it’s sooo freaking hard