- Date posted
- 4y ago
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Yes it sounds exactly like pocd I have pocd too I know what it’s like and I have the same feeling about trying to accept it how you don’t want to accept it cause you think it’ll make you a bad person.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
really? i am just so scared. im so young. i dont want to be a pedophile you know? i want to be a happy kid. im terrified. is what im feeling sound like POCD?
- Date posted
- 4y ago
also i start to feel like im lying to myself or im lying about my symptoms but im not. i dont know how to feel, or think or anything
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@lilli That’s exactly how I feel I have those lying feelings all the time. While to me you don’t sound like a pedophile I don’t want to reassure you since it won’t last trust me!! But you are not alone and I understand what you are going through it all sounds like ocd to me!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
hi, i need some guidance, do you ever worry about the fact that youre not panicking? or worry if you’re just making your symptoms up or being dramatic? cause thats how i feel right now and i dont know if thats normal.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I’m not a psychologist, though it does sound very much like OCD to me- the confessing can be a big part of it. I know you didn’t want to tell your parents, but a GP doctor can actually provide a diagnosis and give you some direction as to what you can do in your situation- you can make an appointment and request the doctor keep the next info between you and them. Also, this goes against the common treatment of ERP but as you cannot currently access professional help and it seems like you are somewhat new to OCD symptoms and diagnostic criteria, from what I’ve found fear of attraction to a minor is extremely common. The best advice I’d seen other than seeking professional help is to remind people that if you feel so concerned that you are one, that is probably a sign that you are not. I hope this helped, and again I am NOT a professional just someone who has had OCD for a while and knows how much it can be to handle- I hope you can get the help you need and find trust in your self and morality! God loves you and you deserve it.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
thank you so much. im crying because im so freaked out. i feel horrible, and then my brain keeps on making me think its okay to be a pedophile, but i dont want to think or feel like that
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@lilli I’m not sure what time it is for you, but I find my OCD also gets much worse at night, and is easier to refute or argue against when I wake up, even if it tends to be a reoccurring worry. What you just said about worrying you are trying to justify it as being okay sounds VERY much like something I do with OCD, and again, being able to review those thoughts and objectively acknowledge they’re wrong even if you occasionally feel like your brain doesn’t believe it seems to be a sign of true intentions- I like to think of it (being religious) as God peeking through and giving me clarity, or like the rational part of me that actually dictates who I am peeking through and saying “I know you don’t believe it right now, but that’s untrue and ridiculous, you are not like that- in time you will be able to believe you are the good person you try to be” AKA ocd can be brutal and strong, but I feel like those thoughts are sort of your non-OCD side trying to remind you who you REALLY are at heart- how God sees you. I hope this helps, and keep going- it’s tough sometimes but with time it seems it gets easier to deal with, you got this!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@EmWest I’d put a trigger warning on this just in case as it discusses this topic- but there is a Psych today article on this That you can looked up by typing “POCD Psychology Today” that can hopefully help you understand how common it is and how it doesn’t reflect your true character
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@EmWest thank you so much. im just scared, but i just UGH its stressful but thank you.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@EmWest i did, ive read articles. im constantly looking up “am i a pedo” “im scared that im a pedophile” ive read all about it,, and i see my symptoms adding up BUT THEN I GO, what if im a fake? what if i think i have OCD but i actually dont and something is wrong with me??
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@lilli Cool down on the research because that will only make your intrusive thoughts worse. And those thoughts you get (like the “what if it’s not ocd” thoughts) are very common in the ocd community.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@sillybilly okay, will do. and thank you
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Hi! Sounds like OCD- but I obviously can’t diagnose. You know, if you need to find a therapist & think it’s OCD, you don’t need to tell your parents exactly what your fear/intrusive thoughts are. You can lie & say what you feel comfortable with telling them in order to get you to an OCD Specialist. You can be vague- say your obsessing about being a bad person or obsessing over irrational fears that cause you distress or just say you have some other OCD subtypes that you feel comfortable with saying. Your OCD content is personal- you are not required to share it if you don’t feel comfortable. Say what you need to to get an OCD Specialist & then be honest with a trained professional about how you are feeling.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
okay, thank you, does it really sound like ocd to you?? im so worried and scared. i dont want to be a pedo, i dont want to think its OKAY to be a pedo. my brain keeps on trying to tell me its okay but its not and im so worried.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@lilli I think you’re seeking reassurance which isn’t good for OCD. I think it does *sound* like OCD, that being said, I am not a professional, but I think it’s enough evidence to contact a OCD Specialist & explain what you are going through. Let them diagnose you, they have a better idea of what to look for. A lot of people in the OCD community struggle with POCD, so you are not alone.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@catmom i know i know, i just cant be a pedophile. i cant live with it. i feel like ending my life at the thought of being one. its scary, i also dont know how to look for help. i cant tell my parents because they will freak. they wont believe me
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@lilli So don’t tell your parents. You are not obligated to share details of your condition if you are not comfortable with it. Be vague about you OCD or make up an OCD subtype to tell them. Like any other health condition that information is confidential- no one has the right to know but yourself & a health professional. You will be okay. Calm down, take some deep breaths. Try to refocus your attention elsewhere for now.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@catmom okay, thank you so much <3
- Date posted
- 4y ago
im so scared, im so worried. i cant be a pedo. i just want to be normal. idek if i have OCD. what if i dont? what if im just crazy.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
ALSO, NOW i think i keep on checking for a groinal response when i see a child AND I GET ONE. IS GROINAL RESPONSE ACTUALLY ATTRACTION? im panicking anyone who has experience with this i need to know
- Date posted
- 4y ago
No it’s not, it’s an ocd response
Related posts
- Date posted
- 10w ago
Trying not to seek reassurance, but rather connect the dots on my OCD and possible reasons as to why I am the way I am. I have severe OCD (or at least I hope I do) mainly surrounding POCD. I've had symptoms of OCD the majority of my life but this theme has come up more recently. When I was a kid, and i'm talking 6-7, I was first exposed to some really gross adult content online. It was introduced to me by a friend of mine around the same age of me. I saw some really disgusting things that a 6-7 year old should definitely not see. This was not a one time occurrence, as I had been exposed to taboo topics online years to come after that, such as the same friend introducing me to Omegle... And i'm sure you can imagine how that went, theres a lot of genuinely disgusting human beings on there. Coming back to the reason for making this post; is it possible to early exposure to this content could be one of the reasons I struggle with POCD? It genuinely scares me to death because you hear that real p*dos dealt with simular situations when they were kids, so thats kind of making me feel that this could be more than OCD, and I could be a genuinely bad person. My POCD feels so real, that at times i'm fully convinced its not OCD. Sometimes I can't even distinguish the feelings of attraction between a younger person and an older person, except for the feeling of anxiety and fear. Its really hard to explain without going into detail, but it just feels so real. Some feedback on this would be great, thank you all.
- Young adults with OCD
- Students with OCD
- False Memory OCD
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- "Pure" OCD
- POCD
- LGBTQ+ with OCD
- Date posted
- 9w ago
Sometimes I think " do I like kids?" "Would i get aroused if I saw content with kids?""What if I'm a pedo and cant accept it?" "What if I'm ok with these thoughts?" "What if I'm not distressed enough " "What if I enjoy these thoughts?" , i avoid kids as much as i can, i cant look at them bc I'm scared I'm gonna have some groin like response. I keep testing if I'd get turned on or if I'd have some groinal response to sexual scenarios with kids. Sometimes I think that if I took my life this would be over and i wouldn't have to think about this and i wish i doubted something else instead of things like this. I had similar situations just with different topics such as if i loved or found sexually appealing a guy while in a relationship and i kept asking myself those questions for months and i avoided going to school for weeks and when I went I'd cry and have anxiety attacks. I had it with past actions i obessed over and felt the need to exploit every detail and be honest because otherwise i was being a fraud. I had it for sexual things that happened when i was a child. Im not diagnosed with ocd but should i tell this to my local counselor? Can someone help? Give me advice or tell me anything?
- Date posted
- 9w ago
I feel like a really terrible person right now, I keep replaying this, and no matter what I can’t remember what happened, it’s like my brain is purposely not letting me think about it. Without wasting any more time, I’ll get into it. Basically, I was at Walmart, and looking at cards with My Dad, I saw anime ones, took pictures of them for my sister, even ones that were anime kids, because I did my best to ignore it, so I looked at a Hunter x Hunter card, I stared at the black haired kid, being all like “ I’m glad I’m not having any thoughts about this, I’m glad I’m having normal thoughts and not thinking anything” I felt happy, then as soon as I looked at killua (white haired kid), everything collapsed. I don’t know what happened, my brain won’t let me remember. But I’ll give bits and pieces. I think that I had false attraction, and something in my head, said “oh, I wouldn’t mind being attracted.” “He is attractive, and I’m attracted to him.” “I remember a girl thinking he is attractive and he is” “ It’s not wrong to be attracted” “ I don’t care about his age” .. something along the lines of that, and now I’m panicking super hard, because I’m worried if I said those things, I feel like I ruined my life that I’m a pe//do and deserve nothing, idk what to do, I feel terrible… I remember when I was having the intrusive thoughts, I was panicking and was worrying, but it kept playing out, and I kept hearing things talk, it was drawn out too long, that now I feel convinced that I was saying those things, I tested it too, and I can confirm that I didn’t say that, but why am I still not convinced? I know I wouldn’t say those things, I was hoping the complete opposite would happen. My brain kept making me feel like it wasn’t wrong and it was okay. Maybe that’s why I’m so convinced I did that. I’m just spiraling super bad right now, I don’t know what to do or what to think, I don’t know if I said that or not… even if I did test it, I genuinely just feel like I said it, and I wanted it, because I still feel uncertain, I still feel like I said it, part of me just wants to be like oh I did and so I can move on, not because I agree with it, I just don’t know what else to do… I’m really scared.
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