- Username
- Bluestars
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’m with you blue stars. For nearly 6 years I have experienced some of the most horrible thoughts towards the ones that are closest to me and my OCD truly has attached itself to all the things in my life that I truly value. Family , friends , work and all other factors that have truly made my life a living hell. These days I’m happy to say that although the intrusive thoughts still occur I’m at a point where I really pay very little attention to them anymore and I seem to finally be able to recognize what is irrational and and what is rational in my mind. For nearly 20 years I have had severe anxiety disorder, depression and OCD which has crippled me and debilitated me in several occasions. The good news is 95 Percent of all people admit to having intrusive thoughts and the other 5% are full of shit!! When you let your thoughts be they will let you be !! Thoughts can not hurt us but our reactions to our thoughts is where the problem lies and the disorder becomes problematic. Fear is not real! The only place fear can exist is in our minds about the future, and in my case I have wasted the majority of my life fearing and worried sick over things that go through my mind . Yet the funny thing is not one thing that I have thought of , worried about or feared might happen has yet to come true !! Once everyone who struggles learns to accept their brain and not run from there thoughts they will finally start to find some peace of mind in their life. Curtis
@Curtis Love this!!!! Your experience with this will help so many people. I believe our struggles can transform us into pictures of success and happiness if we move through them and don’t let them define us!!! So happy for this reality!
@asdf So what’s helped me is to realize the event we are afraid of has nothing to do with that terrible gross feeling in our gut that comes with our OCD. If we separate the fear and realize the fear is not real and irrational, we can take control back from fear, which is often irrational. Does that make sense? Hope this helped
im still working on thinking this way
YOU ARE SO AMAZING FOR THIS! this literally inspires me and gives me more hope!
@Bluestars first off that’s awesome to hear! And ?yesssssss this came through last night. It’s not the thought but any resistance, or fear of an emotional reaction (or the anticipation of one). For me it’s the integration aspect of this realization that’s helping, because it clicks, but it’s consistently integrating that in moments when a thought arises that is the practice for me right now. Thank you for sharing ☺️
Bluestars- how do you take away the negative feelings attached when you think you may have done something awful in the past and just can’t remember? This one is very challenging for me, as I feel convinced that I really did such awful things..
@ocdistheworst - What I think may help would be thinking that people you love and know wouldn’t do something bad - possibly could have done the same thing. In other words, you aren’t anxious about having done something bad - even though that is the reoccurring thought - you are rather feeling anxiety and guilt for another reason (or for no reason at all which is normal for everyone) and you are trying to rationalize it by putting it in something that is anxiety and guilt causing. Does that make sense? Hope this helps :)
That makes a lot of sense and is very helpful!! Thank you so much for taking time to write back :-)
You are so welcome! Here for you!!!
How do we remove the negative attachment? It’s like my mind automatically assumes it’s a threat.
Helpful
I do really feel like personifying my OCD really helped relieve a lot of the anxiety. That and finding a community of people who are having similar thoughts! Being able to take a step back and name a thought as OCD helped me so much. The anxiety is there as MUCH as it was along with the thoughts but knowing that they’re not MY thoughts helped me with direction on where to go from there. I can now get a thought and tell myself it’s ocd because I know it is even when I’m doubting it. I can say to myself even when I’m doubting the ocd that it’s called the doubting disorder for a reason and feel better. I grew up always feeling ~different~ because of my thoughts but never knew they were ocd related and knowing that felt like putting the last piece of a 600 piece puzzle in its place. It helped me put a name to my problems and be like “wow, that explains sooo much” like honestly a weight has been lifted. For that reason,I know I can get through this gross and horrifying disorder.
Small epiphany moment: It’s OKAY to have intrusive thoughts! It doesn’t mean you want them to come true or accept that they are good. A thought is simply a product of the human brain. Allow yourself to have the intrusive thoughts. Acknowledge them, accept them, and allow the thought to come and go as it wants! Be an observer of your intrusive thoughts. A thought is just a thought! It has no power unless we give it power. YOU are the one who gives meaning to your thoughts!
Something that really trips people up is understanding what intrusive thoughts are. What I see suggested a lot is that intrusive thoughts are just unwanted, unpleasant thoughts. This however isn't really enough criteria to separate the thoughts of someone who suffers from OCD and someone who doesn't as everyone gets unwanted thoughts. Intrusive, obsessive thoughts can be defined by how disruptive they are to your daily life. It's not that people without OCD live without taking precautions, but the amount of time someone with OCD spends compulsing over the thought is very disruptive to their everyday routine. For example: a person without OCD will acknowledge the danger the sun possesses and they will probably put on sunblock to protect themselves. They can do it well enough is a short amount of time to go in with their day and don't really think much about it afterwards. However, someone with OCD may spend hours obsessing over making sure every part of them which can be burned is protected. They may even check to make sure they're not burning as the day goes on. Compulsive behaviors (checking, testing, researching, asking for opinions/reassurance) will take up the majority of their time where someone without OCD will have more "free time" to go about their day. There is no relief for the OCD sufferer in knowing they did good enough. They need to make 100% sure they won't burn in this very specific example. I hope this makes sense for those of you who ask this question frequently as I believe it is very important to understand. Many people deny to themselves that they have this disorder because they can't define these thoughts properly and they get stuck on whether or not their thoughts constitute as being intrusive. Remember: just because you feel you are in distress doesn't mean there's actually any danger.
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