A bit of a vent with SOCD, ROCD and others I’ve struggled through so many forms of OCD before since I was maybe 11 or 12.. I’m 17 now. Harm OCD and POCD most notably affected me badly. On top of those though, Sexual Orientation OCD has just not let up in previous years. One of my thoughts was like “what if I just have general anxiety disorder and not OCD?” I did some Googling (highly suggest not doing that), and it said that OCD sufferers latch on to unrealistic things whereas with anxiety, the concerns are more realistic. That scared me, because I was like, well then if you just have GAD, that means you really are gay. Most people who suffer with SOCD do not see being gay as wrong. To me the fear and distress is not at ALL the same feeling as fears of killing a loved one or becoming a pedophile, because people all the time struggle with their sexual identity. So in a sense, unlike being a murderer or pedophile, this is something that often happens and isn’t irrational at all, and is not horrific in any way. On a side note, I’m also Catholic, but completely supportive of the LGBTQ+ community. I truly believe love is love and people should just be treated as people. It makes me sad because feeling supportive of the community makes me feel uneasy as though I’d want to identify within the community and am just saying I’m an ally, when I’m in denial. I just want to give my full fledged support without feeling so anxious. Anyways, I think there’s no need for hate 94 bigotry because God created people in His image. But I know not all people who are Christian view that in that way, and this has also triggered my SOCD because I’m like why do I feel so anxious about any religious topics? Is that because I’m trying to justify what’s going in my head so I can come to terms with what my thoughts are saying? And if God creates people in his image, then just come to terms with what your brain is saying you are. I can’t even type everything out word for word because it makes me so anxious. I also feel anxious about future relationships. Whenever my friends talk about a boy or being in a relationship, it gives me this pit of anxiety as though I’m keeping something from them. How do people with OCD even approach relationships? It doesn’t help that I ended talking to someone I was with for so many months because the ROCD/SOCD would not leave me alone and I felt I was being unfair to him. This makes me so sad to post. I feel so tired lol. My first session is on Monday, though, but I’m worried it’ll just bring me to a new found realization of myself that I was running away from. I’m not asking for reassurance, because I know it can be dangerous. But honestly writing this, I probably hoped I would get it. But right now, I think I’d just like some prayer and encouragement.