Contamination anxiety playing up at the moment. My brother who is living with us at the moment refuses to brush his teeth, wash himself/his hair or change his clothes. He doesn’t take hand sanitiser out with him, he’s been meeting friends without a mask and he only washes his clothes like 1 every 8 weeks. To be frank he does not smell good. It makes me so anxious, it makes me not want to be around him and it makes the rest of my family irritated too. We’ve tried talking to him but he says that it is our problem and that we should just get over ourselves, and that society is what makes us want to wash. I can’t tell whether my ocd and anxiety is being unreasonable or whether I am justified in my ill feeling. Not sure. Has anyone else got experience with this?

flowerboy

Date posted: 5y

that actually sounds horrible especially with this pandemic. i don’t have contamination anxiety but i live in california where the cases are really bad and i know how important it is to stay away from people and be clean. idk if you’re in a place with lots of cases, but either way you should probably talk to him about being more clean and safe for your families and his own safety.

Lola_

Date posted: 5y

Yes so I live in London so we have a fair few cases. We’ve spoken to him but he says no, he says he fine, he says we’re neurotic, and that it’s societies expectation for him to wash but he doesn’t want to. I don’t know what to do, I don’t want to live with him and that sounds really bad but it’s true!

flowerboy

Date posted: 5y

@Lola_ bruh that’s so bad i’m so sorry. the fact that he’s ignoring scientists and doctors💀💀maybe try having a deep talk with him about how you feel unsafe and that you would really appreciate it if he could be better about things

Lola_

Date posted: 5y

@flowerboy The difficulty is that I’ve tried but he just says that that is my problem! :/

ARTnotOCD

Date posted: 5y

Sounds like these would be issues for anyone, OCD or not. I know since I hit my 30s I don’t shower as often as in my teens and 20s. There is a grain of truth to the idea that as societies, we now favor overwashing for what is the healthiest for our skin and hair. HOWEVER, daily grooming (even if not full shampooing or whatnot) is still important and what we as primates should naturally do! Teeth, everyday; face, everyday; when ya smell like BO; wash off those bacteria! Especially if I was living with a sibling’s family, I’d be extra diligent about cleanliness, even without a pandemic. When you’ve talked with him, have you told him that he actually smells? I mean that’s something that he’d hopefully then realize isn’t your OCD. Also, I make a rule in our house: ya come through my door, ya wash your hands. (Only not enforced if someone literally is picking something up with masks on and so doesn’t want to stay or have possible cross contamination.) Good luck with this tricky situation. 💜 (I’m about to go give my pup a bath tonight. He HATES getting wet, but he deals with it. So he sends you clean snuggles if ya’d like them.)

Lola_

Date posted: 5y

Lots of people have told him! He was actually sent home from a job and fire from a job for his lack hygiene and BO. I’m not sure he will change, he won’t listen to his closest family and friends or strangers and even a doctor! Of course I have heightened health and germs anxiety so I know sometimes my standards are high, but I just want the basic cleanliness... thanks for the pup hugs :)

ARTnotOCD

Date posted: 5y

@Lola_ Sorry you have to deal with that, especially in a pandemic! Anytime for pup snuggles! Just reach into the ethers and know he’s sending them. (I was working with him to be a therapy dog before Covid changed social interactions. So he can use the practice even from afar.). 🐶

Lola_

Date posted: 5y

Oh wow that’s a brilliant idea!

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