Help. I’ve been having these hopeless feelings for about a month now. They are terrifying to me. It’s an emotion that comes out of nowhere like despair or being stuck and I can’t escape it. The moment quickly passes and I get so anxious and obsess over getting depressed or snapping. I have no other symptoms of depression and love my life aside from the ocd and anxiety. I’ve always been an optimistic person. But these feeling are so scary and I’m wondering are these are just another form of intrusive thoughts that I’m responding to and perpetuating? Or is this depression? If so why would it come and go? Also I get so scared that it’ll come back or I’ll give in to it which seem like OCD “what if” questions? I ruminate out of fear of the feelings. But how do I deal with this? The feelings are so scary to me.

I’m sorry you’re going through this. This is probably obvious, but there’s no replacement for seeking professional advice. Maybe try an OCD specialist? Or just a general therapist? I feel for you. Whether this is OCD, depression, or any other mental illness, these feelings can be overwhelming. Until you can seek help, perhaps try various breathing exercises, distracting yourself/unwinding with movies or coloring, etc. breathing in through the nose to the count of five and out through the mouth to the count of five until you feel more relaxed has helped me a lot. Or repeating silly phrases or quotes. Stay strong and please, please, speak to someone who is a professional! :)

Reading this sounds exactly like me!!! I don’t think you are depressed it just seems like uncertainty ocd .. however seeking professional help is the route to go!!! You can start to help yourself now though by researching all about ocd and intrusive thoughts. Remember that ocd is not you it is the bully. ERP Therapy helped me get over those doom/hopeless thoughts I printed out a few erp worksheets that dealt with intrusive thoughts and began reshaping the way I thought when I felt that way.. good luck you will get through it!

Also, if you can’t afford therapy there are ocd research studies available at numerous universities that teach ERP for free (the recommended type of therapy for OCD). They may even compensate you. I live in NY, and went to a Columbia university study which helped me. Best of luck!

Thanks so much. I spoke at length today with my dad who is a doctor and have an appointment booked with a therapist in a couple of weeks. I have a great support system and when I’m in a more relaxed frame of mind I know I’m not at risk of hurting myself. I just get terrified at the thought. I love my kids and my life. I might get overwhelming feelings but I continue to fight and trust God.

Thanks so much! This is helpful