Will this ever go away? I feel so hopeless

So the thoughts will never go away? I’ll always wonder if I’m bi? I had a previous theme (I think) and now I get those thoughts occasionally like twice a month. Will it be like that or constantly thinking about it because if I’m constantly going to be thinking about this I don’t think I can manage much longer

@Clementine I don’t know if they ever go away, I’m not really recovered myself. But I think your making a cognitive distortion here in thinking that “if I have these thoughts I will always be in this amount of distress about these thoughts,” when that’s not nessisarily true.

@Nikki1809 It might not be true but I don’t want to constantly have these thoughts for the rest of my life. I can’t cope if that’s the case

@Clementine What are some things you can maybe do to find some hope? Perhaps reading ocd recovery stories? I can tell you that, though I honestly have no idea if these thoughts will go away or not, I definitely used to think “I can’t live with this for the rest of my life.” But things DID get better, and I did get to a point where my life no longer revolves around my anxiety to the same extent. Most days I’m content and happy with my life. Even on my worst days, I’m still glad I’m alive. “Ocd is often a chronic illness” and “I can live a happy, worthwhile life,” are not mutually exclusive statements. When you say you “can’t cope,” what does that mean? (I’m mostly trying to make sure you’re safe, but also a little bit asking what coping looks like to you).

@Nikki1809 I’m safe for the moment I think. I was in a really bad place last night and I meant that I don’t think I can live like this because of how unhappy I feel when I think about a future of living with HOCD but I am safe. I really appreciate you trying to help and I think I will try and read some recovery stories like you suggested. I’m sorry it’s just overwhelming I hate this

@Clementine I get that feeling. My theme is religious ocd, and I definitely wonder a lot if I’m going to ever have a healthy spiritual life again, and I’ve definitely grieved what these past four years might’ve been if I didn’t have ocd. I sometimes worry what my future might look like, too. You’re allowed space to grieve life without ocd, just be careful it doesn’t feed hopelessness. Life is worth fighting for and it’s worth living. ❤️

So I’ll have constant thoughts about questioning forever? Because I don’t think I can live like this

@Clementine I don't know how OCD will manifest itself in the future or how intense it will be for you. What I do believe is you can learn to handle it ☺.

@Ben84 Sorry I know you can’t give me reassurance and I don’t expect you to but if I do have to live like this forever I won’t be able to cope

@Clementine I think you're making the assumption that your skill level will remain the same.

@Ben84 Check out my latest post. See if it helps you at all ☺.

@Ben84 Do you listen to the OCD Stories podcast? It's once a week and less than an hour long typically.

@Ben84 No. Is it on Spotify?

@Clementine Yup ☺!

@Ben84 Every Sunday

@Ben84 Thank you! I’ll check it out