My HOCD anxieties nearly gone. That should be good right? But now my HOCD is making me think and feel like I’m enjoying these thoughts. Fucking kill me. I don’t want to be gay or bisexual at all

It’s just that these thoughts and feelings aren’t things I want in my life you know? And if I did I only want to be with women. Never men in anyway shape or form. I just honestly wish that these false attractions were fake but they feel so real.

@lypc I just want these false attractions to stop

And I feel like I’m attracted to a friend of 5-6 years. I had no feelings for any single one of my friends before this HOCD happened. But now when I’m taking to this friend I get this nervousness and anxious feeling in my chest and I fucking hate it. I don’t want to be attracted to my friends at all. Also one of my friends asked me if I’m gay and I’m not as scared as I used to be when someone asked me that and I feel terrified at the moment

I don’t know how to deal with this shit. The false attraction feels real man. I don’t want this shit. I get nervous and anxious when I’m around him, and I just want this shit to fucking stop

@lypc I just got a spike of a sweet feeling in my chest when this friend told me that a girl texted on my photo on my Instagram. Worst part is that I don’t know who I got those feelings for. I just want to be attracted to girls and only girls. The last thing I want is to be attracted to one of my close friends

@lypc I don’t want to be gay or bisexual at all. I fucking hate this HOCD shit

@lypc Oh god it’s getting worse. Help me

@lypc I honestly hope that it’s because of the girl. Because I used to have a really big crush on her. I also never had a crush on any man at all. Especially my friends. Thank you so much Lypc for everything. I know how annoying, stupid, angry, and useless I can be but thank you for helping a loser like me

@lypc Thank you so much Lypc. So if I were to ask, and I hope it’s true. Would this false attraction that I’m experiencing (nervousness and anxiousness) be considered genuine?

@lypc I understand. I’m just in a panicked state you know? I’ve never felt any attraction to this friend at all until a couple days ago. And even then it was like I felt nervous and anxious. I don’t want to be gay or bisexual but this HOCD is killing me

@lypc Thank you once again Lypc. I just feel like HOCD has done everything it can to screw with me. I never considered myself to be gay or bisexual at all until this HOCD hit. Now it feels like I’m genuinely attracted to this friend and I’m so scared, and confused. The reason why I ask for reassurance is because I honestly just want to be able to sleep tonight. I don’t want any gay dreams at all and it scares me.

@lypc I’m a Christian. Presbyterian. It’s not because of my religion that i fear being gay

@lypc Ive tried Call me Jesses ERP. I puked to these thoughts multiple times during the erp and when it stopped it made me think I had turned gay