Think I'm gonna keep this as my last post for now: I know that I made mistakes, they weren't my proudest moments, but the mistakes don't define me. I know they're mistakes because I didn't have any intent on such harm for anyone else. One of my mistakes involved exploring sexually with others my age and other mistakes involve coming across shocking content I know I didn't want to see. My thoughts keep acting like the opposite, but it's not. I'm keeping it as this, and I'm taking a break from this app. It just adds onto further compulsions I've been constantly told not to feed. Think I'll be back around the end of the month. Need a break from the usual routine to see if it changes anything.

I feel as long as you've learned from the mistake and no one was harmed just as you said you didn't want anyone to be, I think it's good enough to move on from.

@Valentino Yeah. Its horrible. Trying to live with this sometimes is terrible.

@Valentino Honestly. I feel more scarred with my guilt more then anything with some of the things I've found online and I can't help but feel it was my fault for finding those things accidentally. The other mistake I'm starting to not feel so bad for though

@Hoping for the best Idk, living with these mistakes depends on my mood. On one hand I could feel really happy and not let it bother me and I think much more clearly about the mistakes and see them for what they really are but other times when I'm not feeling it I feel so horribly about it even with the context.

@Valentino Yeah the internet is a blessing and a curse. If I could take back the bad things I had to learn about the internet within my time I would do it in a heartbeat. Even on the safest of sites you could find pretty scary things that go against your will pretty easily. I hate that it even happened to begin with but I'm trying to get over it

@Valentino I just wish I was taught these things with the talk instead of trying to figure out everything by myself.

@Valentino Yeah, probably the same for me. I'm deep into the topic of OCD and it has never been this bad. Before it was just about my past mistakes but now it's escalated into a present mistake I have now.

@Valentino I'll be turning 19 soon. It's good that you haven't done as much as me because compulsions are smaller for you. My only POCD is not so much tied with urges against young children because I know I would never want to see kids be placed into something that isn't meant for them to understand, but I'm more concerned of how much my addiction to porn is messing me up in a way. What sucks is that with all the porn I've watched, there were times I was tricked into clicking on a video that was not meant to be seen or involved me thinking that the video was genuine but ended up not

@Valentino For real, it's a goddamn poison. I have it all blocked so I don't see it anymore but I still have relapses on YouTube. I'm trying to stop completely

@Valentino Yeah, not always a good thing. Hopefully I'll be able to get over all of this soon

@Valentino Hey guys youre awake? I just woke up right now and started obsessing again over my real event. Like what if I dont know my intent? What if was bad?

@Hoping for the best Yeah I'm here. Trying not to think about my mistakes too much. It's good seeing you two, but I hate to give you reassurance.

@BigGip09 I understand. Is just that well its hard

@Hoping for the best It is hard. It really is. Your mind thinks of all these different outcomes that try to confirm something you don't want it to. It makes it hard to even see what's right and what's wrong at all.

@Valentino hey guys how are you doing?