I left my partner 3 days ago please help me feel better he’s DEVASTATED and ringing constantly but it was toxic and he didn’t realise he was still emotionally abusing me despite cutting alcohol consumption down (he’s an alcoholic) I feel relieved and sad because what do I do now? I was with him all the time, now what? My ocd isn’t helping either I’m like “OMG what if he gets better and treats a new girl like gold ALL of the time not just in cycles? Why couldn’t he for me?”

He kissed a girl while we were unofficial but a day after he said I love you . I felt we were exclusive based off of things. He acted out of unofficial vs official. Thought because we were single it was ok and if he knew it would have hurt me he wouldn’t have did it he said it was silly meaningless kiss and he wanted nothing with this person. I know he’s telling the truth because he would have lied to me about it but he didn’t . Unfortunately I found out 7 months into the relationship plus he has “no type” and is attracted to women I never ever thought he would be and I think it’s really disgusting . Even in my last relationship I felt this way. So before enter ing this one I told myself no cheating or ones that like these women and here I am …. He didn’t “cheat” but it feels like it. I have been spinning and crying and anxious for over a year now. After I found out I would rotate between that , the women and a transparency thing for a whole year every single day. Asking friends for advice , talking to him , crying , texting all day, even googling . Now I started chat gpt for advice. Whenever I hear it’s ocd I feel relieved but don’t believe it and when I hear it’s wrong relationship I cry uncontrollably and don’t want to believe that either I left him 2 months ago but I’m still in the same position because I love him so much I know he’s a great guy , he tried so hard to make me feel comfortable and he loved me so much but I couldn’t stop spinning . I want to get ba k with him but just picture anxiety forever and questioning am I in love , am I settling , am I forcing this , is this ocd or wrong relationship , could I be happier elsewhere , I can’t see him without feeling anxiety or seeing the kiss but then i can’t picture myself ever loving someone again like him . Our love and connection was so strong . I feel in another relationship as soon as something happens I’m going to want to leave and truly regret leaving my ex . What do I do. I’m starting erp but it’s so confusing to me and I feel like it won’t help and I’m going to be stuck like this forever. I hate waking up everyday because I’m so sad and miserable. Please help me (edited)

Hi - I’ve made a series of posts about my situation over the past few weeks. My bf asked to take a break from our relationship through text the first week of April. We haven’t spoken since. There’s a lot of outward details to this but I’ll try to keep it as simple as possible. My ocd is telling me the worst of the worst. He left me with full uncertainty because he didn’t give me a reason, and his decision felt like it happened overnight and I’m still so confused. He’s never been in a relationship as serious as this before. I’m incredibly hurt and angry, and my emotions get worse on Saturday and Friday nights because that’s when his frat parties happen. I do ERP phrases but my stomach hurts and it’s churning so bad. I deactivated/deleted social media apps for now because it’s too much. I just wish this physical feeling would stop. Does anyone have tips?

hi everyone. i feel this is the only platform where i can vent. i have been with my boyfriend for 3 years. at first, i caught him messaging other girls, asking for their only fans and would message his cousin to text him saying they’re going to the movies that way he can escape with someone else. he would smoke and drink alot. last year, he told me he was drinking after work and wouldn’t answer my calls or texts. he did not get home until 4am and expected me to not be mad. he would aggressively throw things whenever he would be upset. this of course, created a lot of anxiety and trauma. that day, i grabbed my things and left. i ended up giving him a 2nd chance because he was begging me and promised he would change. just last night, he did the same exact thing. he was drinking with his coworkers and i called him because it was getting late (8pm). he kept declining and texted he was w his coworkers and not to pick him up because his cousin was going to pick him up to continue drinking. this of course made me very upset and I told him i felt neglected. I told him I was done with our relationship because I cannot continue to tolerate this. he turned off his phone and got home until 1am. he was upset and said i should just wait for him to get home to talk. today, i packed my bags and left. i do not want to continue feeling anxious or neglected. am i in the wrong for packing my things and leaving? should i have stayed and talked to him? i am super heartbroken as we also had a dog who we both love very much. i feel like i lost my 2 loves and my heart is shattered. i would greatly appreciate anyone to respond. thank you!