- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Yeah that’s super scary. The fact that you know those thoughts are wrong and they disgust you, shows that you’re not a bad person
- Date posted
- 4y
With real event, the memories just came up and these memories were years ago that I have forgotten about.
- Date posted
- 4y
@AmandaM Yeah I've got these too. I get them basically every single day. The reminders never stop and I always think one day I'm going to jail for the mistakes. I feel like I deserve some kind of punishment for the mistakes, even if at the time I feel like they weren't mistakes.
- Date posted
- 4y
Hey you’re ok. Breath. Remember the things you are looking forward to, because you can still have them! Think about how fucking strong you are! You’ve gotten through this, you CAN do this. I know it’s crippling and feels useless and you just don’t want to feel anything anymore. But it will get better. I was in the place this summer where I wanted to hurt myself and end it all too. But I didn’t. And it got better. My head feels better, I’m not constantly sick to the stomach, I can breath, and I have things in life to work towards. You can do this, and you can talk to us, you know we understand and will work through this with you
- Date posted
- 4y
It's just extremely hard. Tbh, I don't know if I could make it 😔
- Date posted
- 4y
@AmandaM Well I’m heat for you. You have harm ocd and pure ocd, yes? I also have harm ocd. Do you want to talk about it more?
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- 4y
@Madison Yeah
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- 4y
@AmandaM Ok well tell me about your harm ocd. What is it specifically?
- Date posted
- 4y
@Madison Well I keep on having intrusive thoughts about harming my family. Also dealing with real-event ocd
- Date posted
- 4y
@annonymous What’s real event ocd? Sorry I’ve never heard of it, I’d like to learn though!
- Date posted
- 4y
Please don't do this, lovely. I've been through so many times where I've felt at such a low ebb with my OCD and every single time, the anxious feelings have passed after a while (even if it's weeks). ERP will help reduce the anxiety if you stick with it. Please keep fighting — there are people out there who care about you, myself included
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
17f Just like the title says. I came to realization that I lost a whole year of life. I remembered my real event in the end of january of 2024. Since then my life has been a living hell. Also kinda made a couple new smaller events through this year. And I know I deserve it cause my event was actually bad. Even people without ocd on reddit agree it was bad. It's still ocd, but I deserve it probably. For this whole year I haven't had a day when I wouldn't think of it. It became my default state to constantly have it on my mind. I walked around, pretended to have fun, talked to people. Most of the time I wasn't really there, I was thinking about my event. My event haunts me when I'm awake, when I'm asleep. I spend this whole year either freaking out, being depressed, thinking on methods to off myself, ruminating, seeking reassurance or trying to distract myself with books, TV shows, social media or daydreaming. Literally barely engaged with reality. So it's so hard to believe a whole year passed... I can barely remember anything that happened during this year. I can't believe this is my life. Probably doesn't really matter cause I don't plan on staying there that long. There is no way I'm going to experience piece with myself. So I will be out in a year or so, since my plan requires some time. Finally will end it all. It just feels very weird. A whole year passed. I was so deep down in my head I didn't even notice. It's scary.
- Date posted
- 20w
Never feels like I can fully put my mind to rest. The problem with OCD for me is once I'm over one worry there's another buried deep into my mind that I'm not fully over. The two events I'm not completely over is when I tried to help a 17 year old with POCD when I was 19 and the topics unfortunately were detailed and even then I explained to them I wasn't comfortable with talking to them. I guess I just had a hard time saying no to someone needing help but it eventually made me so uncomfortable that I stopped talking with them altogether at some point. Then the other thing is being so worried that I committed a crime because my elbow touched someone's behind when I didn't want that to happen at all. I didn't want to listen to my OCD by saying move my arm or something horrible is going to happen so I didn't and then something bad actually did happen. I thought it would just be a light touch while zipping a bag up but then it was worse than I ever wanted it to be and it was so awkward and I hated it. I feel like I just won't be able to get back to the way I was before OCD started all of this. Aside from that I've just had extreme health anxiety but am too afraid to reach out to a PCP even though I need to. Something deep down is telling me I should do this but I'm just so anxious and embarrassed about sharing things to them. I can't even enjoy the things I used to do because this is constantly just messing up my life. I'm hoping I get a start of positivity next time I see my therapist. This just sucks. Feels like others around me are doing so much better than I am and I'm just kind of stuck on these same problems and feeling absolute shame and guilt from the past over and over again. I'm just so sick of dealing with this every single day so I just use escape whenever I can. Even that doesn't really work. I just wish I could go back in time.
- Date posted
- 18w
TW// suicidal ideation There are things I want to do like i have an interview tomorrow for an exciting internship, but i also feel like I kinda don't wanna be here anymore. I'm not actively trying to do things to end my life, but I'm getting more and more tired of the same shit every day and i don't think I even want to come to terms with it and live for the next 40 or 50 years. maybe my constitution just sucks but idk if that's something I want. I don't want to accept OCD. im exhausted and frustrated. I don't want this in my life. But I'm not sure I want a life anymore anyways.
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