- Username
- cerulean
- Date posted
- 3y ago
OH MY GOSH SAME!!! Literally my exact concern right now. But my parents say they want me to be carefree and that God knows my heart. IF there is something we need to address, wouldn’t we rather address it like a normal and rational person, not with all the fear and torment and guilt and panic that comes with OCD? Anything we need to address can be taken care of after we can see clearly — which can only be done after OCD’s volume is turned down through ERP. Then we can rationally tell the difference.
that’s a really good way of putting it! lately i’ve been trying to take a step back whenever my ocd flares up. i tell myself “ok maybe this thing really is a sin, or maybe i really am a false convert. but if so, i want to address it with a clear head, so why don’t i try to calm down and come back to it when i’m ready?” of course that usually doesn’t work because my brain is like “but what if you die before you figure it out and then you go to Hell?”
@cerulean I don’t know what you believe theologically but I really don’t believe you’ll go to hell if you die before figuring it out. OCD attaches itself to things most important to us, and salvation is very important to you, so if you trust in Jesus as Savior you will absolutely not go to hell, even if you die before figuring out if something is a sin or not. Plus God knows we have OCD. He wants us to recover. 💖
Hi I understand your fear, but that’s not how it works. Recovering and the journey to recovery brought me closer to God, you’re not making sin a regular thing, you’re just retraining your brain to not be scared of intrusive thoughts,you can get to a point where the thoughts can be easily dismissed and you will have a clearer mind to discern decisions, I suggest you talk to a priest about your ocd as I did and received very great advice, he told me to just let the thoughts be and move on with life. To not worry about them. God knows about ocd more than anyone and He loves you just the way you are right now. Let Him give you faith and grace to be able to do erp as your therapist instructed. Look up Father Tom Santa online and go to his website Scrupulous Anonymous which helped me so much. There’s a verse from the Bible that helped me a lot, there were others but this was what got me to start having faith in the recovery, Philippians 4: 6-7 Do not be anxious about anything,(A) but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.(B) 7 And the peace of God,(C) which transcends all understanding,(D) will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Hey Cesar could I ask you some questions about this?
@Madison Yes
did you ever worry about converting religions? i’m terrified i want to become a satanist. i don’t think i do but it’s making me so anxious. i’ve been christian my entire life and it’s really bothering me.
@ocdm.7 I had those intrusive thoughts, ocd will use anything against you, but God knows your heart and you know yourself, don’t let ocd confuse your heart, ignore the intrusive thoughts, they’re not your friend, God loves you
@NOCD Advocate - Cesar O. ugh thank you. they just feel so real and like i want them it’s terrifying. thank you so much for your help!!! you’re so kind
@ocdm.7 They feel like that but just because something feels like something it doesn’t mean it is a fact, intrusive feelings are like intrusive thoughts we can’t control them but we can control the attention we give them and the reaction, God is always with us, do not be afraid you are not alone.
@NOCD Advocate - Cesar O. thank you!! :)
@NOCD Advocate - Cesar O. Hey Cesar! I’m terrified that I’m going to de-sensitize myself to moral concerns that are actually true. Because now I have intrusive thoughts about things that ARE pretty true. How can I apply ERP to things that are actually right, even if it does come with a compulsive urge? That will de-sensitize me to those moral concerns... how is that morally ok? I’m paralyzed and scared to do ERP because it will make me carefree again, and I’m worried that’s wrong!
@Madison What things are actually true? Are you on therapy and what religion are you?
@NOCD Advocate - Cesar O. I’m Christian and I’m with a NOCD therapist, doing ERP! So for example, I drop popcorn on the floor. The right, moral thing to do is to pick it up; my parents would surely want that. Honor my parents, honor God. But I never had concerns about things like that before. If I dropped food or whatever I wouldn’t normally pick it up. Now I feel terrified and a compulsive urge to pick up what I dropped. If I try to move on, the anxiety surges. But it IS right to clean up after myself — OCD attached itself to something that was right! So if I do ERP, I will de-sensitize myself to something that is right.
@Madison Ohhh wow I used to have this too!! Hopefully this doesn't trigger you but for example clearing away the table after a meal, I suddenly would get intrusive thoughts that I have to do it because it's the right thing, the thing God would want me to do, to honour my parents and help clean up. But either way, if I did it or not (I always did it, but let's say I tried not to for a few minutes) I would feel so alarmed that this is why I'm doing it! Like why was I suddenly having these thoughts that distress me?!!! The same as I would put things into the bin, and suddenly I start to obsess thinking that Jesus wants me to recycle, to take care of his planet. So I would put things into the recycling bin. And if I didn't, that I was somehow disgracing God and his creation. It was sooo distressing and no one would understand, as it sounds so minute and nothing to be 'worrying' about. Looking back it was clearly ocd, but I didn't know that! I guess what I could suggest is bring up these specific topics with your therapist and ask how to do ERP in a hierarchy way. It could simply start with writing down some thought records (available on psychology tools.com or other websites I'm sure) just to see what it means to you. Usually mind always stemmed back to fearing I was not being a 'good enough' Christian, or a fear that I had offended God.
@Madison I know how you feel but honoring your parents doesn’t necessarily mean picking up after yourself, it goes much greater than that, I suggest talking to a confessor or spiritual guide in your church to understand the commandments properly, you’re not doing anything wrong by cleaning up but it shouldn’t be torture to do it or not do it, erp will not make you careless it will get you to the point where cleaning doesn’t create anxiety, you will not lose your values I know this because I also feared that at some point but it didn’t happen, however it did give me the freedom to live my life, God knows you and knows you love Him, He loves you just the way you are if you clean up or not if you recycle or not, you are alive because He loves you always remember that
@NOCD Advocate - Cesar O. Thanks Cesar! I know God loves me, but there are just tons of situations where I fear I’m doing the wrong thing and it feels so real. When I do compulsions and ask for reassurance from my parents, I get confused and overanalyze their answers and sometimes what they say makes me feel like my obsession was true. I’m so scared I’m doing many things wrong, but I never was before, and I’m so sick and tired of having to do “the right thing”/compulsions all the time! The logic to support my obsessions is so convincing... I know God loves me but I hate the guilt that comes with thinking I did something wrong and not fixing it.
@Madison Look up Scrupulous Anonymous on Google and Father Tom Santa
@NOCD Advocate - Cesar O. Will do! Thank you!
Yes!!! And I worry God thinks I'm using OCD as an 'excuse' to sin or not be close to Him if that makes sense 😔😔and I would never want to do that
Don’t you think He knows that without you having to type it? He created you and knows your heart. Don’t be afraid do erp and be determined to beat ocd, God loves you and wants you to be happy
But I’d love to hear everyone’s thoughts ‘cause I’m struggling to do this as well. I’m afraid to do ERP because I will be de-sensitizing myself to current moral concerns and will be carefree again... and inevitably make more mistakes.
yep!
Yessss I’ve had this thought many times
I don’t like the ERP for Harm OCD because I feel like I’m careless purposely to prove something to myself like I feel like I genuinely try to do something. Has anyone else felt this way?
I’m not sure if anyone has had this fear, but i’m worried that if i actually get better with erp and face my harm ocd that one day the thought of hurting others won’t scare me anymore. Has anyone else had this fear?
PLEASE READ. Ok so I’ve had these intrusive thoughts for a while and essentially at their core they’re about worshipping the devil. I’ve always been scared of doing a prayer to the devil (specifically out loud). Recently for ERP practice my therapist has had me say the word “devil.” We’ve also watched videos about people who have made deals with the devil and videos talking about the devil himself. These are really triggering for me but I understand they’re meant to be as ERP. However, this stuff has really amped up my doubts and I’m not even really sure how to explain them. Basically I’m doubting if I even believe in what I’ve considered my core beliefs, and whether or not I would want to worship the devil. Moreover the fear of saying a bad prayer aloud has spiked especially because I’ve already said the word “devil” aloud. Then I tell myself that if I do it as a form of ERP it would be fine, but then i wonder if my doing it would actually be as ERP or because I actually want to, which stresses me out more about doing the prayer. I haven’t actually done it aloud but I’m scared of doing so.
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