Feeling really triggered right now. I was looking on a dating app and saw a guy from school who I liked before. This anxiety has been there since I met him, but even now I question if I really liked him or not. In a way yes, but in a way it's like he's not attractive enough and I over idealized him. Now it feels like I really don't like him. It makes me feel like my HOCD is really true especially after all this time later. I feel like I have more clarity I just never liked him or maybe I did but it's not enough and I'm gay.