- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Good luck to you and especially to Kane ☺️. I've been in psychotherapy for years ( not ERP TYPE ) I personally think , just myself , that it's very hard to see positive in especially negative experiences but with effort we can find something good and positive out of practically anything . I'm concerned that because you are feeling so overwhelmed ( rightfully so !!!! ) you might not see that anything positive came of your/ your son's therapy but it has ! You and Kane are better informed , you know what doesn't work and maybe more .. please be sure not to identify this experience as " failure " . I say this particularly because I'm concerned Kane might see himself as the " failure " which is completely untrue , right ? I'm a mother too . I have several psych issues and have taken on the role and identity of " the failure " in some situations and now I can see these experiences as just stepping stones to health and progress , to peace ☮️ I'm glad you wrote in and honestly shared too . Sounds so frustrating and I'm thinking about you and how exausted you feel . I have a son ( grown up now , very successful ) who struggled with high functioning autism and depression diagnosed at two years old . I know that frustration , fatigue , the ENDLESS IEP NAVIGATION ! and the guilt I took on personally because I felt like I could not protect/help my child . It was horrible , BUT he is doing good now . If I could offer one thing , one bit of advice in retrospect of my experience ? Take really good care of yourself 💖 Love and nurture you . Good luck with all
- Date posted
- 4y
Sorry to hear of such a rough time. You guys are trying your absolute best for your son and he is trying his best too! Sounds like you can clearly see this isn't working. I would cease any more meetings, no need for it to continue and only frustrate you all as family any more. Have a chat with a nocd therapist here, it sounds like a great place to have therapy! And it is covered by most insurances 😊 May God direct your sons help and recovery. Pray to God about it too and He will direct the steps 😊
- Date posted
- 4y
That sounds terrible! If he hasn’t gotten help this far and you’ve given the program multiple weeks, I’d pull him out for sure! (I’m no professional, though) What is your son dealing with? I’d recommending trying NOCD therapy again too. I’m so sorry to hear that you’re dealing with this. I know the disheartening struggle of trial and error. But don’t give up! There IS hope! Keep searching for answers for your son until you find them. He’s so blessed to have a family that cares! 💖
- Date posted
- 4y
I appreciate this! Sometimes you have to just “call it” when it isn’t working. You lifted my spirits. Thank you!
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you! That’s good advice on the language we use. Agree it’s not a total failure in reality. I just feel so dumb giving this program a try when there were so many red flags. You get desperate as a parent. And who knows—what if it were great. I just realize that so much of this journey you have to handle on your own as a family. Nobody is going to save the day here. It’s a long long long journey and the most we can hope for is slight improvement, maybe his whole life. I’m glad your son is doing good now. I am scared to have hope. It’s been so hard.
- Date posted
- 4y
You’re the first person to listen and care. This response means so much to me. And hearing your input on ending the meetings is helpful. Agree on leaning on God. He will direct the steps. I’ve been awake all night and yiur post might help me fall asleep. I just wanted someone to care. You did that. Thank you. <tears>
- Date posted
- 4y
Aww wow. Well the God of all comfort, wanted to send you that comfort because He cares so much about you and your family. You've done the absolute best! And one day you will be able to help someone in a similar situation. All the best for the next steps, Prehaps here on Nocd 😊. Rest well, all is being taken care of.
- Date posted
- 4y
Just as I put my phone down I thought of this song.. So maybe it will help you. This helps in my the pits of distress: https://youtu.be/eyHn_KPm3uk 😊
- Date posted
- 4y
@ButterflyStar Wow that is so lovely and perfect and simple. Just pray. About everything. Yes.
- Date posted
- 4y
@ButterflyStar I NEEDED " Your Song " today ...so many days .. sharing this with my loved ones , all. Thank you ❤️ . Everyone needs hope and others and we all need to know there is something much greater than us , or our thought and fears . This song so touches my heart ... again much thanks 💖
- Date posted
- 4y
@cricketbooboo Aw I'm so glad it was helpful. God wanted to encourage you! 💟
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
I've been in and out of talk therapy for OCD-related issues for years, but it hasn't been effective long-term. I am struggling with body image / eating disorder adjacent obsessions and I am really hopeful that ERP might actually give me some relief. I had my first session with my NOCD therapist a few weeks ago. It felt like a good match and I was ready to unpack my obsessions and compulsions to try ERP for the first time. The day of my second session she canceled due to personal illness. Then this happened a second time. Yesterday all of my future booked sessions were canceled without explanation. I went to schedule with a new therapist and the ones that seemed could be a good fit are filled up until at least early April. I booked a slot and sent the therapist a message letting her know I would be interested in starting sooner if a slot opened up. I am just disappointed. I could just meet with another therapist who has earlier availability, but it's most important to me that the therapist be a good fit since I've been through therapy so many times. I feel like I'm in limbo until I have an ERP plan set up and I'm not sure how to move forward in the meantime. I'm planning try out a support group but I need a personalized exposure plan and I'm not sure if that's something I should just try to set up myself? Anyone have something similar happen to them? Any thoughts or advice would be helpful.
- Date posted
- 11w
A couple of weeks ago I went through a breakup and was mental reviewing and ruminating the entire relationship. My therapist asked me if we can’t talk about and focus on the OCD treatment (my main themes). I am surprised that my therapist did not recognize that this new situation in my life is turning into another one of my obsession. And the constant talking about it is ruminating and my inability to sit with uncertainly and discomfort of the breakup (ROCD) is OCD and thus needs to be worked on. I am really beginning to question how much he understands OCD and I’m surprised that as the client I have to educate him on it. I have been working with him for many months and I don’t think I’m making process. I’m also having a hard time connecting with him. I want to terminate. I can’t do this. Also in terms of my main theme, I also had to teach him that to some degree. He also doesn’t know terms like “mental review” or “ROCD”. Like the words we all associate with when it comes to OCD. I’m getting not so good vibes. How do I leave?!?
- Date posted
- 9w
And no one at the company will call and tell me why or how this was appropriate, nor did they follow through and make sure I have follow up care. (I dont have follow up care. I’m too afraid to trust a therapist again. My chart also shows I am severely depressed and anxious.) Instead they falsely charted there was follow up and closure and I only found this out because I REACHED OUT and a random customer service member told me: “Hi Tessa, one of our Member Advocates spoke with you first on Saturday, 5/31 around 10am PDT. After that call, the Member Advocate requested that one of our Clinical Managers reach out to you, in which Arlene (the Clinical Manager) had spoken with you that same day between 10:40am PDT and 11:20am PDT. Arlene had discussed your concerns regarding the therapist directly with you during that time and provided you with resources in your area that could be a better fit for your needs. As mentioned, we have reached out to Arlene again today, who has stated she will give you another call to address any additional concerns you may have regarding this situation.” Once I showed screenshots showing there was no second call from NOCD, and demonstrated that Arlene, who I have NEVER spoken to in my life had lied and falsely charted a resolution only continued to lie more and attempt (and fail) to cover it up by claiming she called me on her “personal clinician phone.” “Hi Tessa, we have coordinated with Arlene to obtain more information in regards to what occurred here. She indicated she had called from her personal clinician phone, which would come through as a blocked number on your end. However, for the call today, she is able to give you a call at 2pm PT and call from the main NOCD phone line, so you can expect the call from our (312) phone number. Will a call at 2pm PT work for you today?” After all this … NOCD negligently failed to reach out to me for a second time this last weekend after telling me: “We would be glad to accommodate that for you, and will have another Clinical Manager reach out to you today. Once we have a confirmed time that person will call you, we will send you an update to make sure you are informed of that call time.” No one followed up with a time. No one called. I had to go back into this anxiety riddled place to beg for a call. Still waiting on the call. Be careful. Don’t expect anyone to help you if you experience an issue. They cover for themselves. Having a therapy company that I trusted to treat me and care for me (for a very hefty price) call my family disgusting and attempt to gaslight me by telling me a story about Arlene that wasn’t based in reality, I.e., “Arlene (the Clinical Manager) had spoken with you that same day between 10:40am PDT and 11:20am PDT. Arlene had discussed your concerns regarding the therapist directly with you during that time and provided you with resources in your area that could be a better fit for your needs,” when that never happened is not something clinicians should be doing to people with mental health issues.
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