Anyone elsw feel happy and calm but then suddenly a rush of cheating ocd pops out like oh you shouldnt feel calma round your partner because you cheated! But heres the thing how did I cheat if I dont even recall talking to anyone sexually or flirty during the time we became official. I think and think but all I can remember is telling someone I basically couldnt talk to them anymore because I was taking someone serious.

Dude thats the same thing with me i spoke to people close to our official date we got together in July 31 and i remember going back for validation to check the dms to see if i spoke to any of them during my relationship but I didnt but since i deleted the messages I cant go and check anymore then I asked one of the guys I was worried about who was just a hoe i kept around during my single days i never took him serious and i wasked fornproof he said we last spoke on the 28th of july even sent me a date stamp but what didnt help was him sending me a glimpse of the convo which was like a funny dirty meme to which i replied to it laughing and then he had sent me a booty pic i had sent but the thing is he didnt send me a screenshot of the booty pic he just sent me a saved booty pic i sent him and im almost positive I sent that picture way before like in early june but it really messed with me because I fully remember the last thing I told him was im taking someone serious and ill send you girls your way and that was that but my ocd keeps going what if you still had conversations with him once becoming official and it’s like I fully know that I didnt but my ocd and the feelings that come with it are making me doubt my truth so hard

@Ella___ But its not like I can go back to those dms because I deleted them I remember going back to them sometime during early august to check and then being like okay awesome not during me and my boyfriend being official and then for whatever reason i deleted them cuz I said okay well now that I know I dont need these anymore. I dislike myself for doing that though because now I can’t go back to prove to myself again

@Ella___ It seems like you have proof though! That’s good lol I have no proof what so ever. I wish I could go back and see text messages but I can’t because it was 7 years ago smh. I’m so scared that I sent someone a nude or received a nude that first month of us being together. I’m scared of hurting my fiancé :/ I don’t know how to live with this uncertainty. I always wonder if there’s anyone out there that knows that I cheated and isn’t saying anything.. I honestly don’t remember when I last talked to these girls. I don’t know what to do

@One Day at a time See but even if I have that proof my ocd wont lwt me believe it it just keeps telling me what if what if and it’s just making me feel like somehow I cheated ad I reall don’t wana be a cheater Ive cheated before in the past with ex lovers but never my boyfriend but now im starting to believe that I have due to my ocd