- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I feel you. The month that my POCD crushed they found a 13 y.o. girl that was a victim of a p... then they found and another p... that they were looking for him years. I also have my friends making sometimes jokes on that theme. And then everything calmed down until this month I love theater it's my whole life. When I play or I write I feel happy and I am studying cinematography. This month in Greece it has started a #me too with women and men telling about their sexual and their language abuse that they have suffered from famous Greek actors and directors. And also there is a scandal the last two weeks about a well known actor and director and they accuse him of pedophilia and rape. EVERYONE is talking about that. I have read or heard really despicable descriptions about his crimes. Yesterday night I watched a video of him giving a press conference 5 years ago about The musical Billy Elliot that he uploaded and he was hugging children actors who were around him and I started crying and being really angry with him... Now the theater that I love so much makes me feel somehow disgust. The only thing that makes me feel better is my hope that I will might go to England study theater and work in theater there. I know that everywhere these things happen but at least the English theater hasn't lost the magic for me... Well I said a lot of things you don't have to read them all šš But keep only that I have the same thought. How is this possible everyone talking about that ?
- Date posted
- 4y
Yeah. I just think we notice because of ocd but before I never really payed attention. Im sorry that theater makes you feel disgusted now. It seems like every big holly wood person or actor is some sort of rapist or pedophile and its sickening to here but its also really annoying. I dont want these to trigger my intrusive thoughts.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 17w
i've been very sad these days, i saw a child on TikTok and i had thoughts calling her hot, it seemed like i liked it and i was very anxious and very scared. i cried a lot, i kept replaying the video several times because it seemed like i was attracted to her and only when i was sure that I wasn't attracted to her i skip the video. but then i went to watch the videos of this kid again to see if i was really attracted or not again and i got nervous about being attracted to her "chest" and i kept looking to see if I was really attracted or not š i wasn't, but one thought scared me a lot, which was "you were only attracted because it looked like an adult's chest." i was very nervous, i cried a lot because of this. I'm not attracted to children, I never have been, why does it seem like i am? i don't want to look at children anymore, im too nervous. i'm not attracted to her, all of this makes me sick and sad, it's all very uncomfortable and scary. but I've been questioning myself a lot about the last thought, i can't stop questioning myself. every time i see a child my brain asks if i'm attracted to them or if i think they're pretty. i can't stop crying (sorry for any mistakes I'm using a translator)
- Date posted
- 14w
I was scrolling on insta and I saw a post of a kid, I felt a sense of attraction, idk if it was false or not. I hope it was, I got worried and the kid kept popping up in my head, I kept trying to stop it because I canāt stand not doing anything and feeling attracted, I donāt wanna be attracted to kids, im fucking tired of having to deal with all of this every day. I canāt tell if it is real or false attraction, all of this is so annoying, I canāt even listen to music properly without feelings of attraction showing up. Iām not able to tell if itās false attraction or not anymore at all, it feels way to real to know, I keep hoping that itās all false, and I hope that I have pocd not actual pedophilia because I was never disgnosed, I was also exposed to porn at a young age, and Iām worried it causes pedophilia. Please help me with these attraction feelings I canāt tell if theyāre real or not anymore. I canāt even tell if Iām distressed, panicked, disgusted, or shamed. I donāt feel any of those feelings anymore, idk why, idk how to deal with this stuff anymore, I donāt even know if I have ocd or not, Iāve only ever gotten one short diagnoses that said I have ocd but I lied on 2 questions about feeling arousal which I do, idk why, and the other about liking the thoughts, which I said I didnāt, but in reality I donāt know if I do or not. Also only certain kids trigger the attraction feeling, it makes me worried Iām a pedo because itās only certain kids that cause it, kind of like a ātypeā (edited)
- Date posted
- 13w
I know I'm not attracted to children, there's no proof I am and no indication that I am. Yet why do I still get these sexual intrusive thoughts? Why do I still feel so uncomfortable? Why do I feel disgusting, distressed and confused when I get them? Why do I get them in the first place yet I still don't feel anxious enough? I'm really confused about this. I'm not going to do anything to a child or think of a child that way yet at the same time It gets all over in my mind. Is it just me like uncovering some attraction to children that was buried and where would it even come from I've always been attracted to men that are older than me (not like grandpas or something but 1-6 years older) so why the hell am I even getting these thoughts now? I'm genuinely so confused and I don't want this to happen. It feels I'm betraying everyone especially myself
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond